Principal slammed desk at 6 yr old ( statemented in mainstream)

[Carrie5608]

Ds is P1 in NI ( reception in England?) we kept him back a year so should be P2.

He has receptive language issues and a statement which details this and behavioural issues. He is doing really well in mainstream but still has behaviour issues in the yard. On Friday he got sent to the Head for pushing another child into a wall. He had done this two days in a row. Teacher brought him to head who slammed the desk at him

Apart from this we are really happy with this school.

School have asked for input from the education boards behaviour support unit before should I request this again? Or do something else?

4 days left in this academic year and a new much better ( I hope) teacher next year.

The head "slammed the desk" at him witnessed by the teacher? Was your son hit by the desk and was it the teacher that told you what happened? I think you need to make an appointment with the teacher and the head to find out exactly what went on and what measures they are putting in place to supervise your ds at break to ensure his and others safety.

Can you be more specific? Slamming the desk as in putting his hands on it quickly, doesn't sound like a problem really.
What is bothering you exactly? Do you feel your child shouldn't have been spoken to about his behaviour?

I assume you mean the head slapped the desk hard with their hand? surely that isn't much different to someone clapping their hands hard to get attention or as I have seen parents do to dissuade small children from doing something smacking the floor once hard to make a loud noise to get their attention.

I agree you need to hear it from the teacher to know exactly what happened but behaviour problems or language problems do not excuse pushing another child into a wall two days in a row. Imagine you were the parent of the other child? If I was then telling me that the child who attacked my child has problems isn't good enough as then I would be asking why that child was in mainstream education if it meant my child wasn't safe.

Unless the head hit your child or pushed a desk into him (it would have to be a light desk to be able to do this IMO) then I do not personally see that the head was wrong. The school are probably at the end of their tether with a child who is hurting others whether he is trying to hurt them deliberately or doing it without understanding. The head is also probably aware that the other child's parents will need speaking to, calming down over their concerns and so on.

Ok Thanks. I don't excuse Ds hitting or pushing at all but Ds has a behaviour management plan approved by Educational Physchogist. I don't feel it is being implemented.

Ds told me Head slammed his hand down on the desk. I thought that was a bit extreme.

I phoned the head last week about Ds behaviour he assured me it was under control. "no need for a meeting at this stage" he said.

Teacher never mentioned what happened. I heard ot from Ds. Do I phone again or let them get on with it. I really think next years teacher will sort this quite quickly.

They have sorted it effectively before but not with this teacher.

"Slammed the desk at 6 yr old" and "slammed his hand down on the desk" (according to ds) are not the same thing. If you feel they are not implementing his behaviour management plan then you need to take that up with them.

The SN boards are good at this kind of thing and what sort of advise and support your ds should be receiving. If your ds is hurting other children in the playground then the school are not providing him (or other children) with the support he needs. How did your ds feel about the head slamming the desk? Was he overwrought about it or just shocked? Unless he was really upset I would leave the whole desk slamming thing but maybe ask for a meeting about the implementation of his behaviour plan. Without knowing your ds and his problems it is impossible to say whether the head was being reasonable or not.

I think the teacher is being a bit lazy in that rather than implementing a behaviour policy she sends him to the head. Ds i doing really well at this school but change of routine towards end of term with less structure and more outside time is unsettling him.

Ds is just bewildered as to why the head was hitting the table. He understands 3 to 4 word sentences. Whatever was said was lost on him he justs knows he wasn't happy and he wasn't even connecting it to the pushing incident. They need someone in the yard dealing with this on the spot and they do get 2 hours one to one to fund this.

2 hours 1 to 1 a day that us.

ok in that case I would ignore the desk thing and ask for a meeting to discuss the implementation of the plan and ask if the teacher for next year can be present too so that you can ensure he/she knows how they will have to handle it next year.

also if he needs short sentences then perhaps you can agree with them what they should say when he is in trouble.

if you can agree set sentences they can use which will explain to him it was wrong, he can't do that then he will know where he stands and they will know what to say without confusing him.

Slamming a desk at a 6 year old is not acceptable but slamming hand on desk would be, However you have said that whatever was being said was lost on your son and that he only understands 3 and 4 word sentences so with all due respect maybe mainstream education isn't the best place for your son at this time? I don't mean that in a ruse or offensive way just merely an observation that it isn't going to work out for him at the moment.

You're more concerned with the teacher slapping his hand on his desk to get your child's attention, than the fact that your child has shoved two children into a wall? Why is that?

I phoned the head last week about Ds behaviour he assured me it was under control. "no need for a meeting at this stage" he said.

I am not sure which bit of this you don't get.

Slamming the desk is a sign the school are not handling this well when I know they can.

I don't agree with intimidating 6 year olds, he cries if he loses a smiley face of his sticker chart. They know how to control him. Unfortunately I don't get to go to school with him.

But you don't really know what happened only what your ds has told you. Presumably, if he doesn't connect being taken to the headmasters office with the pushing incident then someone else must have spoken to you about it.

You need to make an appointment with the head and the teacher to discuss this and his behaviour management plan.

I think that perhaps last week there wasn't any concern, if the 2 pushing incidents happened since you spoke to them then they didn't know they were going to did they? So therefore last week there wasn't a need for a meeting at that time.

I have to say I am inclined to agree - 3 or 4 word sentences must make mainstream school pretty difficult for him, perhaps he would be happier somewhere he understood better?

Hmm... Is behaviour the principal problem here? I recommend visiting the ICAN website as they include a lot information on the impact of communication needs on all aspects of education (including behaviour). If the school do not 'get' his communication needs then he will behave badly and procedures to address his behaviour won't work as they are not addressing the cause of it. How much speech and language therapy is he receiving? Is this being integrated into his curriculum? Two hours of 1to1 seems very little if it is meant to include break times. I think you should call a meeting but not about behaviour. The meeting should focus on his communication as that is the real problem, overcome this and the behaviour will follow.

Just to update. Met with teacher and Principal all resolved as mainly a misunderstanding. Only one incident Ds was involved but was one of four boys spoke too.

Head quite happy Ds in correct placement.