6yo girl hates reading - any advice please?

[millingtonsmummy]

My 6yo is a bright and generally well behaved little girl. She's progressing wonderfully at school, her teacher is full of good things to say about her and her reading age is well above average. But she hates it. She has never in her life chosen to read voluntarily. She brings a reading book home from school every evening and the expectation from school (and from me) is that she should read everyday. I insist that she does and I literally force her to do it. Most of our 'reading time' is taken up with her slumping in her chair, staring into the distance, telling me that she'll only read x number of pages etc. etc. When she does read some words it feels like she's not trying, she often reads half a sentence looks around the room for a while, talks about something else. She's not interested.

I know I don't help as I find it horribly frustrating. I do start off being positive, tell her I like the look of the book she's chosen today, talk about what we can see in the pictures, talk about what we think the story could be about or what happens next etc. But she wares me down. I've fallen into terrible habits of correcting her, interrupting her when she's saying nonsense and not registering that the word she's saying is totally made up. I always praise her when she tries hard or sounds and blends words she doesn't recognise.

She chooses her books at school independently, the number of books, styles, interests she has to choose from is vast. We go to the library every week and she chooses books to take home but never reads them, never even opens the front cover.

I read to her and her little brother every evening. She went off picture books but we're working through Enid Blyton, Roald Dahl etc. She seems to love these books and being read to.

I've used sticker charts when she was younger with rewards given once she earned enough stickers. This did get her reading in the school holidays but always with the attitude mentioned above. She seems a bit old for that now.

I've tried talking to her about her attitude on numerous occasions. Today she insisted that she enjoys reading. I told her that her behaviour suggests otherwise and that the experience is horrible for me as well as her. The outcome of our conversation today is that I've told her I'm only going to read with her from now on if she wants to and the first sign of the negative behaviours, we stop. I've also said that I will be reporting all this to her teacher, who she craves to please and if no reading is done at home, her teacher will know the exact reasons. I'm hoping that she'll be shamed into at least doing some reading but I'm not convinced.

When reading is such a pleasure, how can it be such a horrible experience with my daughter? Where did it all go wrong?

I'm guessing the books are boring OP or she is at home and school has officially finished for the day . Is there anything she is into at the moment? My Ds was similar until we made a deal that when he read his school book I would read a few pages from a book of his choice afterwards (inconvenient at times but helped) , now he disappears with the book and reads from where I left off.

Relax. You are doing a fab job - and she'll discover reading for pleasure in her own time. At the moment, the focus on it at school is huge ... and so the pressure may just be a little too much.

In the meantime, I'd recommend this expert's tips - Paul Jennings.

Reading per se isn't a pleasure until you can do it fluently. She is stil learning, and probably tired when she gets home from school.

Stick to 5 mins practice a day, and be relaxed.

Firstly, please don't make reading a battlefield.

Young children are often tired at night after a long day at school. Don't get her to read to you at night unless she really wants to. She enjoys listening to stories, so read one to her. She'll enjoy it, you get to spend time together, and it can encourage her to want to read more. I'd rather a parent allowed their child to read a comic book every night than have a fight about reading the classroom books. Kids magazines such as the National Geographic Kids version, or even magazines that are about something she is interested in (horses, gardening, etc?) are also an option.

Have a look for some different types of books. Herve Tullets 'Press Here' and others of his are great interactive books which are more of a game than a book and this book is currently the favourite in my classroom. We're doing lots of other activities around it, and the students are working in groups to write their own books in this style.

Reading isn't just about books. Get her to help you cook from recipes, read instructions, look up shows in the tv guide, anything at all that involves reading something. If you're driving somewhere print out the driving directions and get her to read it out to you. Kids love to feel they are helping.

Plays are a good way of encouraging her to read. You all pick a character and work through it together. You could get her to actually write a play for you all to perform together as a family.

Good luck OP, but please don't stress too much. If she's not having difficulties with actually being able to read, then reading for pleasure can come later.

My almost 8 yr old is exactly the same she hates reading and I ve found out why.

1. she is extremely active- hates anything still very rarely watches tv or a DVD. If anything she only watches newsround and a program on 5 called family.
2. she is very nosey and inquisitive and loves real life and sitting down with her nose in a book means she is missing out on what is going on outside.

I adore reading and always have a book on the go and I get frustrated that you cant enjoy losing herself in a book. I usually read her a book or a chapter from a book but she doesn't really take it in as her mind is always on something else. I just hope one day it will click and she will realize how enjoyable reading can be!!!