8 year old DD hates school

[MinionDave]

My DD is 8 and in primary 3. She absolutely loved school for the first 2 years and couldn't wait to go there every day, but this year has been completely different.

She says she doesn't like her teacher at all, cries every morning and cries in the evening about it too. I've questioned her regarding the teacher and she says she shouts a lot, not a her but she says she shouts so loud 'she makes me shake'.

DD doesn't have a problem with the work at all, in fact she is in the top groups for all her subjects so isn't finding anything difficult, and she is a people pleaser, in that she will do what she is told and as she does not want a row. (Wish she was like that in the house ).

What would you do? I want to go down and speak to the school, but DD is adamant that I don't. Part of me is saying she will just have to suck it up as there is only 9 weeks of term left, but I hate seeing her so unhappy, and don't want her to think I'm not there for her.

For what it's worth, DS had the same teacher last year and disliked her too, although not to the same extent. He has a different teacher this year and is a totally different boy, loves school again and can't wait to go.

Sorry for the long ramble, trying to write from my phone!

Don't tell her that you are going to speak to school but do go and speak to school

Shouty teacher might mean difficult to manage children, in turn this might mean a child with undiagnosed SN or one who needs extra support, your going in might help school put evidence together to access money.

Or maybe your child is experiencing bullying from her peers and that is making her extra sensitive to tone from teacher?

Just a few random speculations, prob way off!

Thanks for the reply. I have asked if there is anything else bothering her and she says no, but think I will go and speak to the school anyway. I won't accuse them or anything but might ask generally if anything has changed.

Good point about the SN, it's food for thought.

I am not sure that there is much you can do. I doubt if a shouty teacher will stop being shouty because you go into school to speak about it. There was one in DS's school and the shouting was almost constant (luckily DS was in another class but could hear her shouting all day through the classroom walls). I think maybe reassure your DD that it is just this teacher's way and count down the days till the summer holidays.

That's what I used to tell DS last year, some teachers just have different styles. It's amazing what the change in teacher has done for him though, he is very shy and quiet and his current teacher has encouraged him and supported him and there has been a big change in him because of this.

I think I will go to the school just so I can rule out any other cause, and if it is just the teacher then she probably will have to suck it up. I've explained to her that all through her life she will meet people like this and just have to learn how to deal with it. Still it nice though and It's sad seeing her cry every day. Thing is, she goes to dancing and gets shouted at by her dance teachers (they all do) and that doesn't bother her in the slightest!

My dd2 was the same for primary 3-5. Hated school, faked illnesses etc. All teachers were known to me as teachers of dd1 and ds (and former pupils of mine for years back!!).

It turned out that dd2 was trying to avoid homework! She thought piano and violin lessons were homework!

She's now in P6, loves her teacher, is reading books big time and top of the group in maths.

She's not top of the class, but is big in other areas, and the teacher is promoting this!

You never know what goes through their heads, eh? Glad she is happy again.

I'm pretty certain DD has been faking illness too.

I'd tell the school. If two of your children have reacted badly then she probably isn't great and both her and the school deserve this feedback.

I'd tell the school. If two of your children have reacted badly then she probably isn't great and both her and the school deserve this feedback.