Where do I start? Too many qns - worried mum. Pls help

[KrazzyMum]

Hi all,

I know this is a wonderful community, and I often browse through but this is my first post.

Having issues with my DS , aged 9 ,

• with spellings - ( vpoor :( scores good for spelling tests if prepared v recently, but just cannot reapply. Different spellings each time sometimes. )
• english grammar & structure (just cannot remain focussed. Sometimes sentences just dont make any sense at all. But very few instances, he just surprises you. )

-Maths - (better of the lot.. can do homeworks himself and but sometimes just forgets the very basisc.. very scary. )

• in general no organisation, tidyness, eating, forgetfulness and no concentration etc.

He is a lovely boy and very cheerful and liked by all, but I am nowadays showing my desperation on him so much bcos it is just not getting anywhere.. Not even sure how that is affecting him. Feeling like a horrible mum, but I really dont know what to do.. I am prepared to do anything but am worried if I am too late in attempting anything. I wish he was in Year 1 where we could start all over again, but unf we are in Year 4 !!! And so many exams around the corner :(

I really dont know what to do. He goes to a reputed school but feel am not getting much help from school. And feel his form teacher is a bit cold, and even otherwise they only love their high achievers.

Pls help someone. Do I need professional help for him? If so, where do I start? Or will he come out of all this himself.. do I just have to be patient and watch..

Thanks !!!

Hello

Its not too late for your son, I did not learn any Maths at school and have very poor grammer skills, I was sat lost in huge class until i moved aged 9 to a private school where they were doing weekly spellings like "abhorrent" and French which I had never ever done.

As for the school I would kick up one almighty fucking stink.

Why should they pay attention to him if they arn't so inclined, YOU need to make them. The teacher sounds awful,

I would be in there tomorrow with a sense of urgency, this boy needs to learn and he isn't and I want to know why the hell not. Its his whole life on the line here, what the hell is going on.

And you unfortunately May find you have to turn into pushy mum

Pushy mum

I think if my DD was not learning anything by 9 I would turn into the Godzilla of Mums and not give a shit.

We are as responsible for their education as brushing teeth and everything else.

Krazzymum you could be describing DS. His reading is absolutely fine, in Yr 3 he had an amazing teacher who had worked out something wasn't right, but wasn't sure what. I asked if she suspected Dyslexia? Because the teacher raised the issue, the school performed testing and he was diagnosed as borderline dyslexic.

DS learned his phonics well. He can read because he can decode the words, his problem is that he can't "see" how to spell the words when writing so relies on spelling things phonetically. This means it is usually spelt wrong and takes a long time. The result us a child with a very advanced vocabulary produces work his 6 yo sister could better because he reduces everything to the least possible number of words.

Talk to school. Remember to use words like "I perceive", so you don't sound as though you have already diagnosed.

Writing the various issues to be discussed would probably help.

Incidentally I was told that the problem should be dealt with by age 8 or it is harder so please push hard.

Could be worth downloading an app....Dyslexia Quest.

It is basically a series of games, each one looking a different areas of learning i.e. Visual, processing, cognitive etc. It is child friendly and fun, with the children earning coins and progressing through the stages (A yeti going up a mountain!).

At the end it will give you a score on each area and an indication of how your child learns and if there are elements of Dyslexia. It isn't a diagnosis, it won't confirm if there is a learning difficulty, however, it will give you a better idea of whether there may be a problem and that could be a good starting point and make you feel happier, particularly if he does well because then you know he is fine!

We have ours on the iPad, dd sat down and did it quietly as a new game and enjoyed it, she has done it again a couple of times, but really you shouldn't keep testing, give yourself at least 6 months between times.

Best of luck

It was our SENCO that identified in it in DC here in London after only a short time being at the school. I agree, ask the SENCO to run some specific tests and, if they refuse, pay for it privately if you can afford it.