Dismayed at Dd's plan to homeschool

[hamble123]

Hi - this is my first post on Mumsnet, but I am apprehensive about my daughter's plan to homeschool my grandchild (who will be 4 this year).

My daughter is a single parent and due to a nasty break-up with her partner, had to leave her job. To to my dismay she now quite happily lives on benefits (although her 'ex' is always turning up as he resigned from his job and he too now lives on benefits and has never paid a penny to support his child, yet seems to find enough money to chain-smoke and smokes weed).

She is a free spirit who likes to go to festivals and is into 'alternative living'. For some unknown reason she has a major distrust of anyone in authority (eg. medical and healthcare profession, education etc.). She had a homebirth and hates 'big pharma' and it alarms me that my gdd has never been vaccinated. My daughter has never allowed any health visitors to see my gdd either and tells them that she 'doesn't require their services'.

My daughter has no intention of sending her child to school and plans to homeschool and says that about 3 hours of instruction a day will be sufficient. She knows that if you don't register a child for school then she won't be monitored by the authorities. She has no money for resources and I'm concerned that it's all going to be art projects and little else (she doesn't see the need for subjects she doesn't like herself eg. science and she doesn't like maths).

Ironically my daughter enjoyed school herself, she has a degree and had lots of vaccinations when she went trekking around Asia during her Gap Year. I don't know how she can home school if she will be expected to be a jobseeker when her little one is of school age?

When I search online for homeschooling the comments and reports are always positive - surely it isn't all roses? (I do know some American homeschoolers but the parents are religious, motivated and quite strict with very compliant children).

How can I ensure that my grandchild won't fall through the cracks without antagonising my daughter?

At the age of your GD reading aloud has a huge impact on future literacy and imagination. I know many HE kids who are streets ahead educationally because they love to read. I would relax for now as she is so young and just be part of her life, play with her, cook with her, take her to the park to climb and run and read, read, read. She will be OK with two very well-educated women loving her and educating her.

I hate figures of authority after some fairly major incidences of being let down. I don't vaccinate as per the guidelines and I refuse HVs. I have reasons for this.

I regularly consider HE because I know I could do a better job of Educating at least one of my children and the inflexibility of school attendance requirements infuriates me.

I go to festivals and had a Homebirth (not sure why you're concerned about these two things though tbh).

Her decisions are really not that off the wall. They may have been made flippantly but they may equally have been made with good reason.

One thing I would ask myself if I was you, is, given her tendency to steer away from advice from figures of authority, do you, yourself represent such a figure? Because, if so, you need to be careful about what you advise.

I wouldn't like it either, hamble.
But if you can't beat them, join them. I would offer to help with math & science & brainstorm over ways to make those learning thru play.
Good luck.