What do you do after school up to bed time?

[BoysRule]

DS1 started reception in September so I am new to all of this. I am finding the time when I pick him up from school to bed time a bit difficult. I think the weather doesn't help.

He is too tired to do much but doesn't want to watch tv. He'll do something structured with me (like painting or making train tracks etc) plus his reading for ten minutes but then just whines a lot and is listless. Two nights a week he does a class, which although a lot of people say they are too tired for, he doesn't have a problem with and is a lot easier on these days. I think he just doesn't cope well with a few hours of unstructured time when he is tired. It makes me tempted to do more classes just so there is more structure (he currently does swimming and sports)

What do you all do?

DD has just started full time reception this term. By the time we get home (3.30 at the earliest but late if we have to nip to the shops or something), there doesn't seem to be much time left. I make tea, she and younger DS either watch tv, draw at the table or she goes upstairs to play a bit on her own. They have tea about 4.30, then we play a game together and it's bathtime. She's asleep by 7 at the moment.

She has swimming and ballet two afternoons, but I couldn't cope with more, even if she could!

Watching with interest. Will post properly later

DD can't cope with her reading yet. That's a weekend thing for now (although we read to her of course).

I have a yr 1 and a reception child

They are home for about 3.45

They play or watch tv until 5 when it's tea

Then either more play or tv or bath

Followed by reading then bed at 7

DS1 is 5 and in reception. We're home for 330, reading/maths/writing til 4. 4-5 collecting DS2 from nursery. 530ish tea then tv til bedtime (bath couple of times per week).

I think the issue is that he can't play on his own very well and if he does he gets incredibly frustrated and whiny with what he is playing with. I put it down to tiredness but it may just be him!

I can't sit and play with him for 3 hours as you can imagine - so I just don't know what to do with him.

We walk home, which takes 40+mins
She watches tv while I make dinner
Eat together
She reads to me and we practice her sight words/number recognition/whatever her target currently is
Play a game of cards or a boardgame
Start bedtime

we are home by 3:15ish (one child in R and one in Yr1). They have a snack, get changed and play for a bit. DD2 does her reading, DD1 does her spellings, they watch some TV and play. Dinner is at 5:45/6ish, bath 6:45/7ish and bed 7:30 (supposedly - both are awake now though, little one is in bed, big one is reading to herself upstairs). We have activities after school for one of them a couple of times a week and it will shortly go up to more evenings but they seem to cope ok with it.

DS is in yr 1. We usually get home around 3.30 unless we go to the playground on the way home. Then he has a snack and watches TV, then reading/homework. Then I make dinner while DS plays/draws/farts about. He's really not great at playing by himself either so I cook as quickly as possible...We might play a game while dinner is cooking. Then we eat, maybe a bit more playing after dinner, then he watches about half an hour of TV before bath at 6.30 for bed at 7ish.

To be honest, the after school time flies by, especially in warmer weather when we go to the playground on the way home or he can play in the garden.

Sometimes family members come round after school. Or we walk to the library.

op..why don't you structure it a little more...might help you and him...for e.g

mon - drink and cake in a cafe on way home
tues - library visit
wed - even something as mundane as going to the supermarket will get your shopping done and keep him busy - give him tasks or his own shopping list!
thurs - park or soft play if he's not too tired
fri - visit family or jobs at home, clean bathroom, hoover etc

also, get him to help you do dinner a coue of times a weeek - make his own pizzas, lay table...honestly the greatest give you can do is get him to help you cook.

i say this as my dh has been spoilt by his own mother and we both agreed our sons would always help around the home and get involved in cooking the family meal.

apols for typos - stupid phone!

My dd's school doesn't finish til 3:30pm. We get home around 4. I give tea as soon as they're in, something like beans on toast or sandwiches etc as they have hot school dinner. They then play in the play room for about half an hour. After 5pm they're allowed tv for an hour. At 6 it's bath time and stories etc.

DD is in reception, on a day with no clubs it's,
3.15 - 4 Walk home.
4 - 4.15 ish We sit down and I check through her bag/read homework diary/ask about her day
4.15 - 5, Reading, homework, practice spellings
5 - 6 TV or playing
6 pm Dinner.
6.30 bath
7 pm -bed

DD has clubs twice a week, on those nights it's homework dinner and bed.

On a Friday we might leave the homework and stop for hot chocolate and cake on the way home instead (although I've promised DD it will be stop for ice cream instead as soon as it's warm enough)

My dc are older, dd1 is now in high school (S2), but ds is in P7 and dd2 in P6.

Monday - ds has football practice, dd2 has school choir (3-4)

Tuesday - dd2 has violin lesson, then ds and dd2 have scouts.

Wednesday - dd1 has school running team training.

Thursday - ds and dd2 have cross country training. Ds also has swimming later and dd1 accordion lesson.

Friday - all have piano lessons between 5 and 7.

Saturday - all swim.

Sunday - church.

They're busy, but there seems to be plenty tine to do homework, chill, watch tv, go to cinema, do hillwalks etc. even dd1 with (!!) boyfriend seems to have lots of time!

I think when they are not used to structured time you need to help them to learn to play on their own - so set him up with something, jigsaw puzzles are great, sneak away when you can. Eventually he will get used to the idea that he can enjoy time playing on his own.

I think it is essential that children have downtime and get used to initiating play.

Long bath? Play with him and read for a bit then let him get in with it

I agree with horse that some children need to be taught to play on their own - my DS really struggled while my DD was always happy to occupy herself with toy animals or paper and pens and stickers.

With my DS, he had a massive box of small plastic animals so I would get him to sort them on the kitchen floor while I prepared tea or looked after DD - he would sort them big/small, fierce/friendly, put them all out to graze under the table. All he needed was a few suggestions while I did other things - 'That panda looks lonely - can you find another black and white animal to be his friend?' After a while he had enough ideas to play independently.

We also had massive traffic jams of those model cars that snaked around the sitting room.

Time goes pretty quickly here from pick up to bed time!

We get in about 3:30 and I've been at work so I whizz round the house cleaning and doing washing whilst he re energises with a snack Infront of the telly or on his innotab.

We then do his reading book and practice his words list, which some days takes longer as he is tired.

He then has tea and then goes up for a bath and before we know it it's bed time (6:30)

Next week, we start swimming lessons and I am looking for football afterschool. God knows how we will fit that in

As a treat on a Friday we sometimes go to softplay or the pub for tea - roll on better weather !

My DS is in y4. He dropped a few after school clubs this term as he felt he had no time to play, do his homework, spend done family time before bath and bed. He dropped athletics and football.

So now:

Monday - tutor for 40 mins of maths. If he has maths homework that day then the tutor further explains theory and encourages him to complete the work.

Tuesday - no clubs. A fairly relaxed evening tho I encourage homework to be done as soon as possible.

Wednesday - karate. This is a tight fit to get homework done and depending in the subject he may well have to carry part of the homework over to the next day - he has a truely lovely teacher who is very understanding.

Thursday - cubs. Again a late night for him but he does have time for tea and homework beforehand unless he decides to procrastinate

Friday - no clubs at all. Family movie/games night with a takeaway. And play date day where friends come to tea.

He had to read every night in addition to alternating maths and English homework.

Usually not a great amount of own time - but I encourage him to play with Lego or toys rather than electronics which we leave for a weekend treat.

Weekend - he has karate and cricket and extra swimming.

In the school holidays I now tend to play down his activities and not over plan his time giving him days when he is "bored" and has to find his own entertainment. We do have play dates which i try and mix up with school friends and out of school friends and often go out on our bikes and he has a few nice friends In our road which is a safe culdesac so he able to play outside with them often on bikes and scooters with us mums taking the opportunity for a natter and cuppa whilst covertly supervising them ;-)