My ds has glue ear and is currently waiting an appointment for his third set of grommets. He's a young one in his year, and is now in year 2.
It certainly can be counted as a special need, I suspect what you were told is that it wouldn't get a statement.
Basically (as far as I know) special needs can be in the form of an IEP (Individual Education Plan, i think), School Action, School Action plus, Statement. That's in order from lowest special need to highest, the higher you are roughly the more intervention you can expect as a rule of thumb. (Someone with more knowledge may correct that).
Ds has an IEP, it states that he needs to sit near the front, the teacher needs to be aware he may not be hearing, and that he has a TA for (I think it's 10 minutes 3x a week) developing his speech, and particular targets for his current speech (I think it's ch sound at present). This is updated regularly, and I have a meeting with the teacher (brief usually) to talk through the new IEP, assess the old one, and I have to sign and agree it. This happens more often than once a term usually.
What I would do is go into the local schools. You may or may not have much choice of school, but it can be worth considering a less popular school with fewer people, if they are on the ball with special needs.
Ask to speak to the SENCO. Ask them how they would support your dd. If there is SALT in school (a lot of SALT is done in school round here when possible).
Look at the layout of the school. open plan is a nightmare for hearing issues. Ds found year 1 easier as they all work together more formally, whereas in year R they work a small group at a time while the rest play. So he was always struggling to hear over the playing going on (as well as being distracted).
Ds found lunch a real problem because of the noise. He loved the play, but the whole noise caused him real pain. It's worth knowing things whether your dd can have a quiet area they can go to when the noise gets too much. Ds used to sometimes get permission to go to the library just to get a bit of quiet.