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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

Leave declined for wedding....

178 replies

eleanorrubysmummy · 04/10/2013 17:08

Oh dear! My husbands brother is getting married in Feb (on a Friday), been planned 2 years, hub is best man & DD is bridesmaid. just moved up to year3 at a new school so did the right thing & applied for authorized day off......declined & also intimated that an application to fine us will be made if we go!! I'm so stuck......can anyone help/advise/guide us for this pls???

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

shebird · 05/10/2013 19:48

jellypudmum seems like the word 'exceptional' is being interpreted differently by HTs meaning with some saying no to any request for leave for weddings etc. and some saying yes. This means some family's are being discriminated against by being penalised for taking time off when others have leave authorised for the same reason and are not penalised. How is this fair?

Phineyj · 05/10/2013 20:00

I think if you book a wedding for a week day you have to accept some loved ones will not be there - that is the price of saving the money. It is annoying to have to take a day of annual leave (or expose yourself to a fine, like the OP) for the sake of someone else's budget.

With 13 weeks of school holiday a year I can see why heads have to be firm.

I think people with close family abroad have more of a point, however.

shebird · 05/10/2013 20:14

Phineyj What about the importance of family and the right to a family life? Not everything in life can be planned to happen within the 13 weeks school holidays as there is a whole other world outside of education. Many couples getting married do not have children and so are not even aware this is an issue when deciding a date. Most families only have a few rare occasions that they would want time off for, these are special important times and families should not be penalised for this. I am sure a teacher would be allowed leave to attend a family funeral.

ravenAK · 05/10/2013 20:25

Ring school on the day & explain that dd has come down with pronuba & won't be in.

(tis Latin for bridesmaid ).

rabbitstew · 05/10/2013 20:35

prh47bridge - who has defined what an "approved educational activity" is? Or is this at the discretion of the HT? Maybe some HTs would only regard taking part in the Olympics as exceptional, whereas others would regard watching the ATP tennis finals as an exceptional educational opportunity for an aspiring tennis player?!...

Perhaps the DfE should have made more effort communicating with parents, so as to avoid a mangling of their intentions by random HTs.

rabbitstew · 05/10/2013 20:37

So under the old legislation, you couldn't even attend your own mother's funeral????

shebird · 05/10/2013 20:46

Anyone know how religious observance is defined? Do weddings, funerals etc. come under religious observance?

rabbitstew · 05/10/2013 21:17

I don't think all weddings and funerals count as religious observances - even atheists get married in registry offices and have to have something done with their bodies after they've died...

shebird · 05/10/2013 21:24

But if you are a particular faith and the service is being held in a church of that faith then surely this is observing your religion.

rabbitstew · 05/10/2013 21:26

How about a day trip to London to visit a special exhibition at a museum? Is that an "approved educational activity"? What about a trip to the US to do a tour around the White House and visit the Smithsonian? Are these less educational than doing your grade 2 piano exam, or just too time consuming/too much like a holiday/too much like something that ought to be able to be done in school holidays (but actually can't always)?

rabbitstew · 05/10/2013 21:27

Personally, I wouldn't view attending my own mother's funeral as being primarily about religious observance... largely because I would be doing it for personal need, not because my religion told me to.

mizu · 05/10/2013 21:31

Have read this with interest as my sister is getting married in November on a Thursday and I haven't asked the school yet - yikes!!

I have 2 DDs who are going to be flower girls and I suppose I ought to go and talk to the head mistress...........

shebird · 05/10/2013 21:33

It's crazy that this legislation is even making parents define if attending the funereal of a family member is an exceptional circumstance or religious observance. There should be no questions it's just human decency that someone should say goodbye to a loved one or celebrate their marriage

rabbitstew · 05/10/2013 21:36

Human decency is not an exceptional circumstance (I hope). Computer says no.

TheIncidentalGoat · 05/10/2013 21:46

Just to correct a post waaayyy down the thread. The fine is per parent per child per offence (not session) so is not a multiple of the days taken.

The offence is failure to secure regular attendance and in most LAs you would be issued with a warning notice to improve attendance before getting fined.

teacherwith2kids · 05/10/2013 21:52

DD's school is very clear. WATCHING a sporting (or e.g. dancing or music) occasion is not authorised. Taking part in a sporting (or e.g. dancing or music) event is allowed IF it is overseen by appropriate authorising body - so music exam taked under auspices or ABRS or Trinity is fine, as is a dance festival organised by that governing body, but a disco run by the neighbour is not.

DD has authorisation to take part in local panto (under licence granted by county). Dance exams are marked as authorised absence, whereas the panto is under some other code (DD had 100% attendance the last year she was in the panto, despite missing 10 ays of school).

No, it's not logical. Being in the panto is NOT more educational than watching the Olympics.

shebird · 05/10/2013 22:07

And by the same token that puts being in a panto above being a bridesmaid and attending a family wedding or visiting a sick family member living abroad

teacherwith2kids · 05/10/2013 22:10

Exactly. Definitely not logical - especially as DD's absence, 1 or 2 day blocks spread over more than a month (with very late nights prior to school days), is FAR more disruptive than a block absence of a week or fortnight.

teacherwith2kids · 05/10/2013 22:11

(I did raise this concern with him - expecting the answer 'no way can she do it', but he was fine..... bizarre.)

shebird · 05/10/2013 22:13

Might get DD to audition for panto and head off skiing for a week

teacherwith2kids · 05/10/2013 22:15

Hmm, I do have to send her licence into school to get the absence authorised so unless you are prepared to go that far, get the part and then pull out, possibly not a goer!

skyeskyeskye · 05/10/2013 22:31

Found out today that a parent going to America for three weeks, booked it eleven months ago, only recently asked for time off. If she had asked at the time it would have probably been authorised no problem. Asking in July, was told by headmaster that they can have one week ok, second week is half term, third week will be classed as unauthorised absence. But they will not tell her what the fine might be.

shebird · 05/10/2013 22:38

Only joking teacherwith2kids if only I could afford a ski trip!

Would love to know how many cases of sickness will be reported on the Friday before half terms and just before Christmas. Perhaps I will post in a few weeks and see what the teachers out there say.

rabbitstew · 05/10/2013 22:39

So "educational activity" really means, "linked to the unlikely scenario that this child might actually one day become a world famous concert pianist/tennis player/dancer/actor, and has proof that their activity is linked to one of these things," and the authorising body overseeing said event has put a lot of political pressure on the legislators at some point to allow such activities.

ModeratelyObvious · 05/10/2013 22:39

If she had asked at the time there is a good chance that wouldn't have been authorised, Skye, as it's ten school days off early on in the school year so attendance would be well below 90% afterwards.

One week is pretty generous and I think July was before the rule change (?)

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