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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

Has anyone else's child started having accidents after starting in reception?

20 replies

WidowWadman · 26/09/2013 21:39

Daughter has been potty-trained for well over 2 years, and since she started school has had about 4 accidents. She's been in full-time childcare since she was a baby, so being away from home isn't new. She really loves going to school, too, but seems more tired than she was at nursery.

Just wondering whether it's normal, or whether I need to do anything about it?

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AbbyR1973 · 26/09/2013 21:53

Yes it's very common for children to start having accidents when they start school. Is she having wetting or soiling accidents?

louby44 · 26/09/2013 21:55

I'm a reception teacher and have 2 children who have wet themselves today. They just don't go in time or are distracted in their play. One poor little thing did it in assembly because he didn't know he could put his hand up to go.

I have lots of spare pants/trousers/skirts etc. parents get really worried but its normal.

hinkyhonk · 26/09/2013 21:55

We've had a few too and loads of pre wee too. I think it is the fact it's a environment and they concentrate so much on he teacher and what is going on they forget about going for a wee (I hope).

Fingers crossed it will get better

MousyMouse · 26/09/2013 21:59

yes
it's very common.
it's a big change, lots of peer pressure as well.
it will get better :)

Original poster

WidowWadman · 26/09/2013 22:03

It's only wet accidents. Overall school seems to be doing her good, and she seems very happy and confident, that's why it's so surprising.

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Wigeon · 26/09/2013 22:07

Happened with my DD when she started Reception last year. She didn't seem at all anxious about school and definitely seemed to be enjoying it. She'd been potty trained day and night by 25/26 months with literally no accidents after that, so I was really surprised. School was not in the least surprised! They had a stick of spare clothes specially for such occurrences. She only had 3 wee accidents I think, and one thing which possibly helped was drawing a tiny picture with biro on her hand before school (eg a star), and telling her that that was her reminder to go to the loo during the day!

Original poster

WidowWadman · 26/09/2013 22:28

That's reassuring. Thank you

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freetrait · 26/09/2013 23:39

It's normal. Bit shocking I agree, 2 years no accidents and then, eh, what's going on! DS did this a bit I remember. I think being in a YR class if very different from full time childcare re expectations of fitting in/keeping to routines/being independent. This is stressful even for children who seem to take it in their stride. Stress induces accidents, or as a pp said it can just be not enough brain space left/anxiety about asking in a big hall of children. Give her time, she'll sort it out.

AbbyR1973 · 26/09/2013 23:41

If it's just new onset of wetting accidents since starting school, I would suggest the following:

Talk to DD about going to the toilet at every break time and not holding onto go to the toilet.
is there an issue about using the school toilets- does she actually go to the toilet at school, what are the toilets like, are they near to the classroom, is she worried about asking to go
make sure she is drinking adequately,filling her water bottle regularly.
can the teacher remind her to go at breaktimes.
get a urine sample dip tested by the GP just to make sure she hasn't got a urine infection.

pyrrah · 26/09/2013 23:59

Endless - pretty much every day.

Had a chat with DD and she said that she just gets carried away playing till it's too late and that she tries to go at break but can't wee at the time.

She's been dry for years and we didn't have the same issue at the primary nursery class last year. I'm hoping it will settle down when things aren't so new and exciting.

Adikia · 27/09/2013 12:15

DD has had a couple of accidents, when I spoke to her she said it was because she didn't want to miss anything when she went to the loo so she tried to hold it. I've seen quite a few kids go home in PE kits so I think its a pretty common thing.

Jellyandjam · 27/09/2013 13:07

My DS hasn't started having accidents in school (he has had one but that was when he was told he couldn't go to the toilet when he asked grr) but he has started bed wetting which he hasn't really ever had a problem with before. It's happened 4 times in 2 weeks now but he seems happy to go to school.

MrsFlorrick · 27/09/2013 13:14

Yes. DD has started reception. She has only had two accidents at school. However she has started wetting the bed.

I think she is so tired she doesn't go. The bed wetting doesn't happen at weekends or beginning of the week only towards the end when she is shattered. She's only just turned 4 and youngest in her year.

She actually asked me for a nappy last night. She said "I am so tired mummy it would be so much easier with a nappy then I wouldn't have to get up". I refused and she wet the bed.

RomanMum · 27/09/2013 22:35

Poor littl'un! My DD also just turned 4 and wet herself on way home from school last week - DH picked her up that day haha. She forgets to go just before she comes out of school and we have had a few times of getting to school gates and having to go back - or using tree halfway home. I'm hoping it's just because everything is so new and it'll settle down soon.

NutcrackerFairy · 29/09/2013 00:06

I have just started a thread about this....

My DS is soling himself at school [only started reception this month].

It is reassuring to hear that other normally continent children are having accidents as DSs school have been insinuating that it is not normal that he is .

MrsFlorrick · 29/09/2013 00:43

Nutcracker. It is normal!! It's utterly ignorant and downright rude to say otherwise!

Toilet routines are often disrupted when DC start reception. As in lots of distractions and new stuff plus they may forget they need to go or feel somehow embarrassed to ask and therefor hold in poo and end up having accidents or end up constipated and have both poo and wee accodents.

Is your DS one of the younger ones??

My DD have poo withholding issues in pre school because of the change in routine. School have been brilliant about it and that is now sorted but I do have to keep my eye on any constipation (as in make sure she poos daily). I feel like the excrement police

She has wet herself a couple of times in reception due to not making it in time. I am working with her to ensure she knows when to ask and I have spoken to her teacher about it (my request). It will be fine.

DD has also been so tired she has wet the bed because she hasn't woken in time.

DD has only just turned 4. And your DS??

I am for you that your school says this. Someone else will be along with more sage advice shortly.

tethersend · 29/09/2013 00:45

Nutcracker, I have just posted on your other thread. The school are wrong. Angry on your behalf.

PedantMarina · 29/09/2013 00:54

Normal. DS is 3.5 and though [daytime]trained for at least 6-9 months, had an accident the other day.

I think it's just the excitement of a new environment, etc, that puts their attention:bladder ratio back a bit. It will pass.

By "accidents", I thought you meant falling - this too has been been happening a lot in the last week or two. Apparently, some of the children have ear infection. DS doesn't, but in his case, there's so much to run around and do that he just doesn't pay attention to where he's running.

HTH

Cat98 · 29/09/2013 08:18

Ds had accidents frequently in school all through reception year (thankfully they seem to have stopped now he's in yr 1 - touch wood!) so I sympathise.
We saw a paediatrician in the end who ruled out medical problems (barring slight constipation) - he was just too busy/lazy/distracted to go to the toilet! We tried everything and it was very stressful. He also did it at home too so slightly different to your situation - just wanted to share for possible reassurance as apparently ds was still considered on the normal spectrum with no obvious medical issues and was still having accidents!

Original poster

WidowWadman · 29/09/2013 19:12

The strange thing though is that the accidents don't happen so much at school, but mostly at home. She had two in the after school club, and wet herself several times at home. Twice this week.

Her wee doesn't show any sign of infection - I have to test it regularly anyway for another unrelated reason.

The nutcracker school seems odd and not ok.

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