No info at all from school re starting reception. That's crap, right?

[herbaceous]

I'm currently composing a stroppy letter to head of DS's new school, about the fact that we have had no information about the start of school, such as term dates, inset days, rough timetable, curriculum, uniform, lunch arrangements, whether/when he'll do PE/music, what he needs to be able to do, what he needs to bring, or even when the school day starts. Their website is two years out of date, and thus useless.

This is shit, right?

There was a meeting for all new parents, at which you could buy the uniform jumper, but as there were 120 families, one person selling, and five minutes to do it in, no-one stood a chance.

We met his teacher for a grand total of ten minutes, and there was no chance to meet other classmates or for him to look around. It contrasts so starkly with some friends' experiences of home visits, information packs about stuff, organised picnics for new parents, etc etc. I just feel we're leaping into the void.

And remember, it is the school holidays. There will be no-one in the office to take your calls or check e-mails or the answer-phone. If you are lucky the caretaker will be in and teachers are generally around and about but the office staff aren't paid over the summer so won't be there!

Pop over and see if you can leave a message with someone. In addition, the school will almost certainly be open the days before the beginning of term ( the county website will have the term dates on-just google --shire school term dates) .
If you haven't got any of the information you need, there must be 119 other sets of parents with the same problem!

Herbaceous:

OK I think a quick e-mail to the school is necessary:

ESSENTIAL INFO:

DC NAME
DC Date of Birth
DC Reception Teacher's Name

Ask them to let you know what day he will be starting and what time school starts. Explain that you haven't received a prospectus and ask if they could e-mail you a digital copy. Explain that the urgent issue is the uniform code, which you don't have any information on.

I don't expect you'll get an answer soon - but the point is it is a written communication.

I also think that the school may be very complacent. They know they'll be sending information to new parents on X date -but haven't explained that at the meeting (or you didn't hear it).

The thing that really surprises me is that is the essential information that the school should have provided at the new starters meeting for you in July.

Thanks again PSBD - you've been so helpful.

There's no point emailing, however, as I've never got a reply from any emails I've sent before. Either the email address given on the website is wrong, or no-one every checks it. Hence the letter, now worded to be a helpful enquiry, after an email to the one parent I do know to see if they've had any information.

I know the day he's starting, and the time, thankfully, as his teacher told me that. She is now in Australia for the summer, and anyway I wouldn't want to pester her - surely it's not the teacher's job to tell parents about jumpers, and other tedium.

I suppose PFB-style angst re singing, PE, etc, was just born out of wondering what, if any, after school activities to book him into (as they get full so far in advance), which would depend what he does during the day. Thinking about it, he'll probably be too knackered at the end of the school day to do anything much.

The problem is there won't be anyone around to read/reply to your email until school returns in September

Does the school have a Facebook site, or Twitter or anything?
Also, just an idea but if you have a local Facebook selling site you could ask on there if anybody knows what the uniform is for the school?

Just an idea

What is the issue re uniform? Do you not know what the uniform is at all, or you've not been able to purchase it?

I know the uniform is black trousers, white polo shirt and red jumper/fleece. However, the red element has the school logo on. And seems only purchasable through the school office, which is shut. And his teacher told me they were changing the logo anyway, so there wasn't any point buying one until September. Thus I'm assuming I can just buy any old red jumper, but don't want him to get told off.

I also don't know if I have to buy black shoes. He's a nightmare with shoes, and won't wear anything new so don't want to force the issue if it's not necessary.

It doesn't have a Facebook page or Twitter account. I've asked on the all the local parents Facebook pages for info, and to see if any new starters wanted to meet up, and have drawn a total blank. It's as if the school doesn't exist!

I'm hoping the head, or someone, will be popping into the school now and then to prepare for the next term.

99% of primary schools specify black shoes, no trainers. Avoid lace ups unless he can tie laces -30 pairs of shoes to tie can take a lot of valuable teaching time.

Don't worry - you seem all set for uniform and if the sweatshirt is changing it is best to wait until September when the new stock is available, rather than having bought it at parents meeting and find it is the old stick soon after your child starts school. Agree that black shoes are the way forward; Velcro not laces. Maybe it is best to get them a few weeks before start of term to wear them in if he stresses about new shoes.
Many, many children start school without having met their peers before. Parents work and childcare arrangements make meet-ups impossible. Many children will be in the same boat and your child will be fine.
The lack of information is not ideal, I'm disappointed you haven't had a welcome pack. But don't assume the worst. A new head who is not (or barely) in role yet could be the making of the school once they settle. Lots will have fallen between the cracks during transition and it may not be that they just don't place a high priority in giving you information about starting school. They may not even know there is a problem, they may have sent packs and it has gone astray or maybe so much is changing that the information has just not been ready to send.
Going down your concern list:
term dates - check LA website, they have LA wide dates
inset days - usually first day of term, then ask as soon as you can most schools have them tagged onto start or end of various holidays.
rough timetable - I don't know many teachers who can give that yet, hall timetables for PE need agreeing, staff need to get to know the children. EYFS isn't as straightforward as 9.30am phonics, 10am maths, 10.30am playtime.
curriculum - EYFS, as followed nationally. What sort of information do you want? Once the teachers know you child they will be able to give that information in more depth. We can't discuss what topic we are doing if they are child led, or which phonics we are covering until we know what they want / need.
uniform you appear to have this sorted now.
lunch arrangements did you fill in a school application form? Ours asks what lunches you want. If not send the money in a named envelope stating it is dinner money.
whether/when he'll do PE/music - it is part of the curriculum, so yes, but too early to answer the when
what he needs to be able to do - as a previous poster mentioned - socialise, basic self-care, etc.
what he needs to bring - himself, PE kit to leave in school all week, maybe a fruit snack
even when the school day starts - even if the website is out of date this should be the same

Hopefully this is calming your stress levels a bit. PFBs starting school is stressful, even for teachers. Be careful your DS doesn't pick up on that stress or he could pick up negative attitudes to school.

Good luck and let us know how he gets on.

Well, I've emailed the one other parent I know starting reception in September and she hasn't had any information either, and also thinks it's a poor show.

Hi herbaceous:

Glad to hear the advice you've been receiving has helped and just to say please hang in there.

My feeling is if no information has been given to anybody, then either:

a) it might be coming, but nearer to starting date

b) they'll give you a mass of things to read on day 1.

Our school was woefully chaotic with this kind of thing when DD1 started but persistent parental feedback that information has to be clearer, briefer and more directed toward relaying essential info clearly to parents has meant that a welcoming pack is now given to all parents (or posted/ e-mailed) at the new starters meeting or individual parent/ teacher meetings for each new Year R pupil.

The thing I would push for once you're at the school is improved communication with parents - especially digitally (website/ twitter/ e-mail). Our school now e-mails all letters/ newsletters to parents - this is advertised as 'saving paper' to help their 'eco-school' status - but they also explain to parents how non-paper system is making savings in the schools stationery budget, which can be spent on more classroom supplies (and is now).

I think the thing to take away from talking to another parent - is that although you're absolutely right that not having this kind of basic information is very frustrating/ nerve wracking - other people are in the same boat and that must suggest that aside from being there at the right time on the right day, there isn't a lot more the school is expecting from you.

I'd do a packed lunch for day 1 - as a safeguard - but you can ask about cooked dinners before/ after school and try and arrange for that shortly thereafter. Hopefully you or your partner can make drop-off/ pick-up to ask these questions.

However - be patient - you may find all this kind of thing is explained in letters sent home with your child on day 1. Certainly our DD1 came home with dinner money letter, clubs information, field trip letters, information on where to get uniform items (many schools let you order direct from supplier & the items ordered are delivered to school or they have a supply you can purchase through the office), etc.... We spent the first evening reading letters from the school, filling in envelopes/ cheques & putting a very tired DD1 to bed early.

One piece of advice: pay by cheque. We made the mistake of paying in cash (since there was no information on paying by cheque) for half-term school dinners & milk money and all our money handed directly to the new Year R teacher disappeared. To be fair the Year R teacher confirmed that we did give her this money when we received a rather nasty letter a week later about not paying for school dinners - but we never got to the bottom of this 'issue' and we had to pay again. Since going cheque only - we've never had a problem.

Although it is normal practise for children to visit new schools some children start without a visit. I'd visit the school on inset day and speak to staff if available.

It will work out as everyone has said. It is magnified by 100 because it's a first child starting but as said before it will work out. Your little one will be fine. As this was your fifth choice did you ask to go on the waiting lists for your 4 other schools as there is often movement over summer.

When you don't get your school choice, you are much more aware of all the negatives - I know I was. Nobody will be answering emails or the phone at the moment because they just aren't there.

Ring on the first day of term, and find out then. Be nice - it may just be a cock-up and in any case it is best to save being stroppy in case you have a bigger issue later.

I don't think dc need anything like as much preparation as they get. Both my dc were late starts - I had two days' notice of the start time in both cases. They were absolutely fine with that - though I was really worried about it.

Also, ring school admissions to find out the start of the school term plus holidays - they will have that info. I would also tell them I didn't know the school uniform - they may be able to help.

I know you're right about being hyper-aware of negative aspects, tho for example not knowing the uniform had meant, for example, forking out £42 on school shoes, just in case he needs them.

Re emails, I've emailed the office twice and the deputy head twice, in June, and got no reply. At the same time I left four messages on the office answer phone and no one called back.

Are the initials for the school EW?

Nope, MG! Are you in the same boat?

It does sound bad - surprisingly so. But some schools are poor with parents but great with kids etc. I would keep as open a mind as you can for now. School shoes sound like a good bet in any case. You will probably find that they either don't do PE or don't get changed for it in the first weeks. Go on the first day and pop into the office to ask any questions and find out your start date. Reception dc don't start on the first day in dds' school, and even if they do in yours, he won't exactly miss much.

No but someone I know is.

Surely he'll need school shoes wherever he goes? I don't know of any school which has uniform and not school shoes.

Yes, it's pretty bad, but at least if a place comes up in one of your preferred schools you won't have shedloads of uniform you can't use!

Re shoes, during our (brief) visit, the reception kids were wearing all sorts. Some proper school shoes, some trainers... So don't know if there's a rule you're supposed to stick to, but failure is tolerated, or whether they don't really care either way.

God. I bloody hate this school already.

Most schools say black but there's scope for a variety of styles.

I think you need to take a big breath and a step backwards. I know it's normal to want to know all these things but your DS will be there for years probably and there will be lots of things that drive you batty, but you just have to get on with it.

They probably don't care then - our current school doesn't but the previous one did. But no school tells you they are slack on uniform - you just have to work it out. Generally reception kids start off smart and go downhill from there.

I was a late entrant but did still feel irritated I didn't get the info pack. I still think it was bad but I love dds school and the teachers. You might too. But you don't sound that relaxed - I'm not either - so the loss of control and lack of certainty is going to bug you until your ds is settled. It is pretty hellish tbh, but it does get better.

I'm not relaxed, no. At least, I would be a great deal more relaxed if I actually liked other aspects of the school so far. When I came home from the parents meeting and visit I bawled my eyes out. The site was chaotic, the other parents cold, and it was so far from what I'd wanted for my PFB. Meeting his lovely teacher allayed my fears a little, but with the general air of chaos, and lack of information/care, I just feel I'm letting my little baby into the lions den. Irrational, I know.