Primary school insisting my child takes water not squash to school, despite there being a medical reason for it

[TheOriginalNutcracker]

My ds is 10 and suffers from frequent migraines. He takes daily preventative meds for them, and we try hard to manage them by eliminating triggers.

Obviously, dehydration is a major trigger, and so I need to make sure he drink enough during the day. I send him to school with weak squash in his water bottle, as he is not overly keen on water, and so will not drink enough of it. I know this to be the case from seeing him drink at home.

School are kicking up an almighty fuss about it. I have spoken to them countless times explaining why he needs the squash, and have also written a letter insisting he be alowed it, abd again explained why.
Today he was pulled into the heads office because of the squash.

I went in after school and asked to see the head. I was told she could only speak to me for 2 minutes. She came out and right away knew why I was there. She just went on and on about many people not liking water and getting headaches, but that other kids would think it was ok for their child to bring in squash also.
She then said that my ds had promised earlier that day, to try and drink only water next week. So basically they got him to agree to this in a meeting with no parent present.

I explained again about his migraines, but she basically insisted and just said that ds had agreed now.

Is there anyting I can do about this ? I think their treatment of him and his condition is appaling. We have also had issues where they have made him wait for calpol when a headache starts.

People have such low expectations of children. It's a shame.

Hmm. I don't actually think a 10-year old is anywhere near old enough to really understand the consequences of not drinking enough water. Plenty of adult diabetics, epileptics, etc, still don't really understand the consequences until they kill them, let alone a 10-year old boy with friends to play with and water to ignore because it doesn't taste nice.

The 9 year old insulin dependant diabetic in my class would probably beg to differ.

Honesty just send him with two bottles of squash everyday everydaythen if the teacher checks that on may get poured away and he drinks the other at lunch.

They will get bored long before you do, I don't think our school ever lasted more than two weeks moaning about what was in water bottles.

DD2 just took lime squash

Show me a 3-year old diabetic who is capable of managing his condition and I'll show him to you at 15 when he's rebelling against it.

Quite likely rabbitstew but it doesn't alter the fact that we have children from nursery to y6 who monitor and manage diabetes on a daily basis as well as children with allergies and chronic conditions

curlew - yes, people do have low expectations of children. They put flavouring in their calpol and make silly and ineffectual attempts to make dioralyte more appealing. They have low expectations of adults, too, by sugar coating a lot of their pills.

A battle is only worth fighting if it's really important, not just a point of principle. I don't think a school insisting on water and nothing else is more important than ensuring that a child is well hydrated enough that they don't need to take more medication than absolutely necessary, personally. Either the school has to force the child to drink the water so he's well enough hydrated, or let him drink something he's willing to drink himself without being badgered. It's all rather self righteous to tell a 10-year old it's their fault they are taking more medication than necessary, when they really aren't going to understand properly that in the long term, controlling a condition with medication rather than sensible behaviour is a foolish thing to do. At the age of 10, you are still enforcing sensible behaviour in this regard without full understanding, you are not expecting them to take on full understanding and responsibility themselves. So, either the school spends more time ensuring he drinks water, or it lets him drink something he is happy to drink.

I suppose I think that a child is not going to get dehydrated in 90 minutes. And yes I do think a 10 year old is more than old enough to accept that it's water only in class.

And I have a migraine sufferer too. But I don't pander to him- he has to learn to deal with a condition he will probably have all his life.

curlew - the 10 year old does accept it's water only in class. He also appears to accept getting dehydrated. As a parent, I would still think him young enough that I would want to do something about this behaviour, rather than accept that it's his choice to take more medication, which is really not good for the health or control of his symptoms in the long term, but a necessary evil. If the school isn't going to help ensure he's drinking enough water, then the school should allow his parents to seek alternatives, rather than taking him out of parental control and leave him to harm his long term health.

If a 3-year old diabetic didn't want to control his condition, would that be OK? Would the teachers leave him to it and call the ambulance when necessary?

The school is. The OP said that the Head had had a word with him and they had come to an agreement that he would try to drink more water- but the OP was outraged that the ahead talked to her son without a parent present.

The point is that a 3 year old should obviously not be left to manage their condition unsupervised, but if they can learn tat that age what they should and shouldn't eat, then a 10 year old sure as hell can learn that he has to drink water for the 90 minutes or so between juice/squash opportunities.

And if, despite your firm belief that a 10-year old sure as hell can do something, he sure as hell isn't doing it, what is your plan B?

Bribery. Sanctions. But certainly not changing the rules or telling him they don't apply to him.

Erm can't you just add a little dash of lemon/lime or something into his water?? Or is that a no no ? I don't mean actually making your own fruit juice, I mean just adding a little bit of fresh lemon juice or something similar.
When I make my fruit smoothies in the morning, I make my children a glass of water with ice and when I juice the fruit I add a tiny dash into their water glass just to give it a bit of a taste for them.

They have school meals and get milk at breaks and other drinks at lunch, so I never had to take in any form of drink for them at school. So feel free to correct me if I am wrong and you are not allowed to add a bit of flavoring to the ones you bring in. It is what I would do personally.

Erm I think 3 year olds vary.I had a 6 year old newly diagnosed diabetic in my class who struggled to manage her condition.

I think the key words are newly diagnosed

The thing with the water only rule is that it isn't only mrz who is dehydrated all day... But hey, who cares? Rules are rules, even ones that whilst claiming they are for the sake of your health, are actually bad for your health, because the rule isn't that you keep hydrated and make sure you drink regularly, the rule is that you have water in your beaker.

If teachers don't have time to ensure their class all drink regularly, I wonder how they find the time to sniff everyone's beaker for evidence of illicit substances.

I'd be surprised if many 3 year olds could manage diabetes with zero adult monitoring.No way would I have handed it over to any of my 3 even my super sensible twin.

Teachers don't have to rabbitstew there is nothing more indignant than a class mate who realises someone has juice in their bottle. Personally I don't carewhat is in water bottles but let's not pretend that there is a medical need for the OPs child to have juice.

How did they manage at nursery and school MrButtercat or did you pop up regularly?

I remember school in the 1980's , I felt constantly thirsty, no such thing as water to drink in class. I had whatever drink from my packed lunch and that was that.

Where were all the migraine sufferers then, these things seem to be on the increase.

idiot55 - I think these things genuinely are on the increase. Besides that, dehydration is not good for the health or concentration and I think most children get dehydrated at school - by the time you're actually thirsty, after all, you've been dehydrated for quite some time.

Funny how schools will interfere to the extent of insisting on water in beakers and insisting that parents ensure a beaker of water is taken into school, but won't interfere to the extent of ensuring the water is drunk.

mrz - a classmate has no need to feel indignant if they understand how important it is to drink water, because it is so much more healthy. Surely they would just feel pity for the poor child with the rotten teeth?

Ah, but rabbitstew, you can lead a child to water....