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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

DS separated from friends. Good or Bad?

7 replies

SummersHere · 21/06/2013 15:09

Ds had his school induction day today, he has attended the school nursery for 2 years and has a core group of around 8 friends though he plays with other children too.
So it turns out that none of the children he's friends with are in his class (p1). Please tell me this is a good thing! He himself does'nt seem too bothered.
Anyone have any similar experiences they'd like to share?

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Periwinkle007 · 21/06/2013 16:05

I think if he isn't bothered then I wouldn't worry. It can work both ways, sometimes it is comforting to them to have friends in their class already but then they either stay friends with them or make new ones anyway or don't bother to try to make new ones and just stick with their old ones which can be quite limiting OR they prefer to have to branch out on their own, mix with everyone and then still see their old friends at playtime.

Original poster

SummersHere · 21/06/2013 16:52

Thanks for your reply. The more i think about it i actually think it might be a good thing, less distraction! Ds is very confident around other children (not so much adults) and always makes friends easily at the park etc so i'm hoping this won't phase him too much.

OP posts:

GrimmaTheNome · 21/06/2013 16:56

Its fine. He'll make new friends in his class, and may keep some of his old ones too.

Fuzzymum1 · 21/06/2013 17:53

DS3 moved up from reception to year one last september and was separated from his two closest friends - I was really worried but it has done him a world of good - he is much more confident and significantly less reliant on them now.

beanandspud · 21/06/2013 19:46

I wouldn't worry too much, friendships at that age are fairly transient and it is likely that he will still see his nursery friends at playtime and for some classes.

DS's reception teacher was telling us that they mix the classes for Y1 and I think it's a good thing and gets them used to mixing with other children.

harryhausen · 22/06/2013 07:14

This happened to my DD after nursery, although to be fair she didn't have a huge core of friends. The ones she did seem to click with were in a separate class. I have to admit it worried me stupid. Not to mention there was a very competitive mum going around telling all parents that the classes were of different ability and her ds was obviously in the 'advanced' one that my dd wasn't in Although my logical brain told me it was utter rubbish it really niggled me and added to my angst.

Dd is now in y3 and couldn't be happier. She's doing incredibly well academically and she's really popular . She's not a very 'girly' girl so gets on really well with boys and girls. I think it was the best decision and now I couldn't imagine it any other way.

If in honest, I think a lot of my worry was that I got on better with more mums in the other class (apart from competitive mum of course!)

Your ds will be absolutely fine.

DeWe · 22/06/2013 13:29

I think it depends so much on whether it's a good thing or not. I've heard parents saying it was the best thing ever happened after the even having been upset at the time. And parents who say their child never settled because they were always looking over their shoulder to see what best friend was doing, having thought it would be a great thing to be separated.

If he's happy, then I wouldn't worry.

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