who would you move?

[kilmuir]

I have a quiet DD in a large primary, Y2, and a more outgoing DS in reception in our village school. Some concerns raised by nursery that he may be displaying aspergers but educational psych not overly concerned. ( we lived in UAE, at the time)
Well we have been told this week that both schools have spaces for each child at respective schools!
I don't know what to do. I have to put son in before and after school club as both schools start at same time, so feel a bit out of, especially as he does not mention any friends in particular. But lovely feel to the school.
My dd's school is much bigger, 3 x30 intake etc. They do have more on offer re after school clubs etc and she is doing well.
Would a smaller or larger school best suit my DS as he gets older. Larger school more help available or is smaller more personal. All the older boys say hello to him in the village which he loves.
Help. Sorry its long

agree ds would benefit more if dd happy.

DD is happyish at the school, but said she would move when I mentioned it to her before.
I think my real concern is my DS, he is very sociable and doing well with regard to reading etc but as years progress will small school be best place for him

No real experience here, but some hearsay.

A small quiet school may appear to be best for your DS, but could hide any difficulties he has. This could mean they only really come to light when he moves to secondary. Whereas putting him into a larger school now lets you see if he copes, and if he doesn't you can sort out what support he needs whilst he is still young. This level of support could transfer with him to secondary.

A lad at our single form primary coped (just at primary, but was unable to cope at secondary, and is now being tutored by the LA while they work out a statement and appropriate support.

Small school, every time. Much more attention, much more of a community, all the adults know and look out for every child, not the many petty rules you have to have in a larger school.

i am still dithering. DH says keep them both where they are!