Parents evening,...yawn, I know

[MrsSham]

But dd had, what would in retrospect seem like a really positive parents evening. However I'm very despondent to what should have been positive, was portrayed very negatively.

Bearing in mind she is only just 7 years old this month and She is 3a in literacy, feedback was wonderful, a very engaged and clever girl due to her love of reading. However there was a massive BUT....not quite level 3 in numeracy, I felt an over whelming disappointment being transferred from her teacher. And my response was. Is she happy? Is she progressing? And is there support to come up to target? Yes yes but until the final question, well no as she is way head of where she should be nationally....so why tell me in such a disappointing manner that my dd is doing well above what is expected.

For goodness sake, why didnt I hear great things that she is a whole year ahead in almost reaching level 3 and she should be proud, rather than disappointment, that she didnt quite make it. And incase any wondered no support as she is way above target... can't we just be proud of these 7 year olds that love school and do their very best. I for one am proud my dd is almost level 3 in maths even though she just isn't quite there.

What do they say to the parents who's children are bang on target? I dread to think.

I loathe parents evenings with a passion that is ludicrous.
I equally loathe tests/sats/cats the same way.
My DD is a bright girl, very bright and will do well when she gets to exams.
When teachers give you the 'disappointed' face because she didn't perform as well as expected it pisses me off no end.
I have a three way tomorrow - really it's what it is called, with all of DDs subject teachers.
I am not looking foreword to it. DH is no help whatsoever. He teaches at her school and won't come with me. TBF, he will be in the same hall and we have to consult him about her.

BUM. I saw this in active condos, DD is Y7 so not at primary anymore...

This is conjecture of course (and it?s a shame the teacher didn?t articulate why she was disappointed) ? but I wonder if the teacher was disappointed because she felt that for your daughter ?almost? level 3 was disappointing? Based on the level she started this year and the progress the teacher feels she is capable of.

It don?t think it?s really helpful to compare an individual child against national standards (except to get a feel as to where they are in the broad scheme of things) ? you need to compare them against how they are doing themselves. I?m immensely more proud of DS?s ?expected? level in writing (because every ounce of it has been achieved by huge amounts of effort and determination) than DD?s ?well above average? level (because she finds writing totally effortless and coasts to a certain degree).

I would assume the same as redsky. Because your teacher was disappointed for your dd as she thought she was capable of more.

With dd2 one teacher told me she was disappointed that she couldn't award her the grade she deserved as she was getting carried away in her writing and failing to punctuate it properly for her level. The disappointment was that she could not award her a better mark, which she felt she was more than capable of, not how disappointing the actual mark was.

The same teacher was estatic with a friend's child who achieved his first level 1 (in year 2) because she felt he had worked so hard to achieve it-and she was right, for him this was a massive achievement.

And you don't need the teacher to spell out that 3a is an achievement-you know that already.

Possibly although I'm not to sure that was the message the teacher was giving. I just felt she was viewing it in a negative light rather than positive. I was approached by another parent this morning who expressed the exact same before I had even mentioned it too.

Sorry to hear that you had a negative experience. Agree with last two posters - it sounds as though the teacher felt the Maths level wasn't a true reflection of your daughter's ability. It was probably meant as a compliment in a weird way, but I can totally see why you left feeling upset.
Bear in mind the majority of teachers have never worked much with adults outside of academia, and sometimes forget also that parents don't know all the internal jargon and expectations and things - they can assume and thus convey things badly at times. I know I have been guilty of that with friends when I acronym at them and they yell at me!!
Your daughter IS doing really well and that should undoubtedly have been stressed more though. Congratulations to both of you! :) And I'm sure she will continue to make great progress as she clearly has a great attitude to her work.