'Magic' tricks that are really just mean tricks - is this worrying?

[lecce]

Ds (Yr1) has just moved schools due to a house move. I have always worried a bit about him socially as he had few friends at his old school and didn't seem (to me) to fit in all that well. I should add that his teachers always told me that everything was fine and dh (sahd - did all school runs apart from the odd one) concurred.

Anyway, he came home today and told me that his new friends love magic tricks. I asked what they were and he explained that you put the wrong colour lid on a felt pen so that someone is tricked into using the wrong colour. Or, you offer a pen in such a way that the person ends up just with a lid. This was accompanied by much fake, ott laughter .

It has left me feeling uneasy. Is it 'normal' childishness? I would (and did when we discussed this) discourage ds from doing stuff like that which could annoy/upset others.

On the other hand, I could well be being paranoid...

I agree, if the silliness is played out equally it is not that worrying, if it is just him, I'd tell the teacher.

At that age, they love practical 'jokes'. There's not a breakfast when I am not offered a 'boiled egg' (empty shell) or a tangerine (empty skin). Oh how I laugh.

Her dad showed her. And is convulsed with laughter.

I think that it sounds like very normal behaviour for boys that age. I would only be concerned if they are only doing it to him and not any other children and are also carrying on doing it despite him showing that he doesn't want them to. Children that age can be very silly and don't think of the impact of their actions on other people but unless your son is upset or it sounds like they are bullying him I don;t think you need to be worried. Stay alert though.

I very much regret showing my ds's the empty shell/ boiled egg one.

I think it sounds pretty normal too. My DD (6, Yr1) would think all of those things absolutely hilarious. As everyone says, it's only if the jokes are targeted at a single person that you need to worry.

Does he think it's funny, or is he telling you a little trembly on the bottom lip?

Because if he thinks it's funny, the chances are he's laughing with them, and is feeling they're friends.
If it's upsetting him, then they're potentially laughing at him and it could be nasty and it would be worth talking to the teacher.

Also if he's laughing with them, but he says it's always at the same person or they're getting upset you also need to talk to the teachers.

At that age, children don't always get if their "tricks" aren't funny to the victim, so it's worth making sure no one's upset, but it's the sort of thing that one child does and for a while all the class does. Thinking it's terribly funny and driving the teacher mad.

You don't make it clear whether your ds is doing this, too, or just having it done to him. He does describe these children as friends. On the face of it, it sounds like utterly normal, irritating, childish behaviour to me, and only mean if you transplant adult (female) minds into the bodies of children, but I guess the details are important to interpret the reality, and no-one on here can tell you what the reality is! Also, you know your ds far better than any stranger on the internet does. Do you think he was upset by it, really?