reception DD so tired!

[whattodoo]

My DD is in her first term of reception. She was 4 in March, so not the youngest of the class.

but she is so tired, every weekday morning and after school is one long moan, dawdle, plead for TV, begging me not to make her go to school etc.

She gets up at 7ish and has a good breakfast. We then either walk 20mins or car to school. She has school dinners which I know she eats well.
When I pick her up at 3.15, we either or car home.
Snack and drink when she gets in and some days we do her reading homework, some days she is too tired to concentrate.
Tea at 5pm followed by bath and then bed at 6.30.

I'd rather walk than drive to and from school because I think it is better for both of us, but it takes longer each day and we have a falling out every single day. Today it took us 35 mins (with scooter!) and I was late for work.

She and I are both fed up of my nagging her "hurry up, come on, we'll be late" and yesterday she was absolutely horrid to me - so rude that I couldn't excuse it and she ended up with no TV and a in bed by 6pm. (obv, I gave her lots of cuddles and explained why I was so cross, still love her as big as the world etc.)

I've already decided that she needs to be in bed by 6pm at least for this week. She used to go at 7/7.30 before she started school. This was after an 8-6pm day at nursery, so its not as though she was inactive previously. n

Any tips to get me through the next few weeks until Christmas? I really am dreading them ...

Is she well? DS1 was like this last winter, and it turned out that he was brewing chickenpox and was also having asthma symptoms.

An inhaler helped a lot because he was sleeping better, but also lot of the rudeness and silly behaviour can be caused by oxygen deprivation.

Might be worth getting her checked over?

Unfortunately the only tip I have is "grit your teeth and bear it". The last few weeks before Christmas always seem like very hard work (my DC are older and we still get this every year). The only other suggestions I think are things you are already doing - cut anything out of school down to a minimum, early bedtimes. Unfortunately it's only likely to get worse (sorry) as the run of Christmas plays, fairs, discos, parties etc kicks in.

It's the pre end of term grumbles. They go a. It demob-happy towards the end of term and get tired and grumpy. I remember dragging DS to school when he was little (about the same distance) and him bawling on the way home that he was 'sooooooo tiiiiireeeeddddd!'.

I did wonder whether she's a bit off-colour, but don't want to make excuses for her. I'll bear it in mind keep an eye on her temp etc.
I'm going to take a banana with me to pick up so she can snack straight away and not fall into an energy slump.
Lots of cuddles, lay-off the homework midweek and early nights.
Just wish that the short amount of time I spend with her weekdays wasn't so fraught - had plans for magical mother/daughter Christmas crafting sessions and tramples through the autumn leaves gathering holly etc.

DD3, also reception (but one of the youngest, 4yo in July) is an utter utter nightmare at the moment. She's so tired and whinges constantly! She's also picked up a horrid snotty cold on top of having had shingles just before half-term so i think she's a bit rub-down. I've got a multi-vitamin for her now, to try and help her out, and am just gritting my teeth till the holidays. You have my sympathy!

I had this last year.

The TA told me that it's a recognised thing, and warned us in September that come November The DC might moan about being too tired for school.

I did keep DS at home the odd morning when he was just so tired he couldn't function.

The school were fine about it. It was literally 2 mornings, I let him sleep in to recover a bit.

DD1 is like it too. A grumbling whinging tearful nightmare at the moment. At the school gate this morning she burst into tears because I pulled her hat down a bit on her head . I can't wait till the holidays to get my nice child back.

Yes, sorry but think this is normal for this time of year in YR. I remember the playdates got postponed last year due to the kids all being too tired and grumpy . Not sure you can do much more about it- watch out for signs of illness, lots of sleep, maybe a bit more chilling out than normal. Unfortunately all those wholesome mother type activities go by the board and survival becomes of the essence!
Good luck. I'm with you with the walking to school thing- I get mine to walk unless they're poorly, but maybe there is a limit- how far is it? We only have half a mile which takes 15-20 minutes when they both trot along happily (just 4 and 6) or 25-30 worst case scenario. I provide after school snacks at school gate as I figure this is a good compromise re I'd rather walk than go in the car. I rarely get bad moods/falling out with the snack. HOWEVER..... I remember at the start of term I got bad behaviour, grumps/rudeness etc from both kids and I was really strict in that if they behaved like that there was no telly- trouble is often they behave like this when they are most tired and most need to chill out, so in some ways not such a good punishment- I feel your pain, hang on in there......only a few more weeks to go!

I would drive just to get over this hump. It's an awfully long term and it's very cold. All my DCs are tired and grumpy by the end of term.

I would also take a snack for when she comes out of school for extra burst of energy for hard bit getting home.

DD1 is a 7pm - 7am girl and in her first term at school fell asleep on the carpet at reading time and fell asleep on the toilet at school. They had to climb over the cubicle to wake her up

Well, strangely she was a treasure today!
I took her a little bag of teddy bear multivitamin chews which she had as soon as she got out of school

I think she may have remembered yesterday when we were both so cross with each other and taken on board that its better to do as your told and have a happy (albeit snails pace) walk home rather than play up and be miserable.

It's 0.75 mile walk/scoot home but maybe i'll drive once or twice a week, particularly on PE days and Fri.

Roll on Christmas!

I am now 32, however, my mum always tells me that for my first term of big school she had to take me home for a 45 mon nap at lunchtime.

I've always been a huge sleeper (13+ hours a night) and simply couldn't cope. The teachers would find me curled up in the book corner so just caved in until I got better .

Prob wouldn't happen nowadays!

DD has a cold and has been basically asleep most of the day (or on the sofa under a blanket) for the last few days. She's 3 and just started nursery for a few hours a day, but I think it's just been a bit much for her. We sent her yesterday and apparently she spent the entire time crying or sitting on a TAs knee, so we kept her home today.

My March born DD is also shattered. Poor things. They get very run down at this time of year.

I think a twenty minute walk in this freezing weather is too much for a four year old. If you have a car then I'd use it. A lot of children are very tired towards the end of the winter term.

Good news, I bet you're pleased! My dd is the complete opposite - full of beans, would happily go to bed at 9pm, only needs max of 10 hours sleep and when we get home she asks 'what are we doing next mummy?'

So both ends of the spectrum can wear you down

I think a twenty minute walk in the freezing weather is actually quite healthy MOST of the time. However, I think just having that little bit further and a 4 year old who is at school everyday (mine only goes to nursery 3 days a week), might just tip the balance. Play it by ear as you say. Doing a mix of walking/car is fine .

I had tears from my little one on pick up today (she does full days when she goes), due to tiredness I think, but she walked home beautifully and her big brother boogied and sang all the way. So, we really enjoyed our walk and the tears would have happened if the car had been there too.

MY DS goes to bed at 6.10pm and wakes at 7am. He is so exhausted beyond description and we have done a fair number of half days. He really doesn't have the stamina to walk to school, so we don't. Expect things might pick up slowly as he gets bigger.

Were your kids at nursery/pre-school before starting in Reception? How tired were they then?

DD currently goes to the School Nursery from 9am-3.15pm and then to a private nursery till 6pm.

She is still raring to go when we get home and if she goes to bed before 9.30pm she gets up again at 11 and won't go back to sleep to past midnight. She gave up naps at 6 months and failed to read the manual that said that newborns sleep a lot.

Can I expect a miracle next year in terms of knackered child, or more of the same?

That's not much sleep for a young child Pyrrah! Does she thrive on that, no tears etc? I guess they are all different.

pyrrah my DD went to private nursery 8-6 three days per week. She used to go to sleep about 8pm and wake about 7am.

When she started school, I wad warned that she'd be knackered but I didn't believe it because she'd been bouncing around at nursery since 8 months.

I can't explain why, but she's certainly more tired than ever before. I'm sure she'd happily sleep 14+ hrs per night if we could squeeze it in!

Y4 teacher here. Also very tired! It's near the end of term, it's all go at school and it's dark and cold in the mornings and the evenings. We have lots of colds and coughs going round as well.

I have a very tired dd in reception, she's always liked her sleep. She has fallen asleep at school once this term. With the odd exception I think she copes pretty well. What works for us:

I send her for a sleep after lunch on a Saturday and she has about 3 hours and still sleeps at night.

We walk and that is not a problem. I think the fresh air wakes you up after the oven that is school. I really think you shouldn't shove a snack in them at the school gate. They get plenty of food at school - a school dinner the same size as an 11 year old would get or your own packed lunch plus a fruit snack. Lots of parents do this and the snacks are ridiculous - family sized packs of sweets , 100g bar of choc , monster size pack of crisps/mini cheddars seem to be most common here! They are going to get a come down from all of that as soon as you get home. Mine have milk and a small plain biscuit/slice of bread/fruit when we get home if dinner is going to be a while.

Some nights I have to accept she needs to be in bed by 5.30 so she gets dinner made early for her (and sometimes for her siblings) and then in bed as soon as I can manage it.

My older DS was not like this. It means life is really just school and a few snatched hours :( Good luck.

Sorry haven't read all the responses yet.

Could you just drive her until the end of term. 20 mins walk is quite a long way at the begining and end of a school day. Could you take a bus part way?

My DD1 has just started reception and she is very tired. She can be foul to me ( mean mummy, threats to punch me, blaming me for anything and everything) when she gets out of school, on the way home and until bedtime. I do anything I can to get us back quickly so we can chill out or try to indoors. We have a ten minute walk.

I take some snacks to have on the way home. On days she is not so tired these give her the energy she needs to get back. I have my DD2 in a puschair as well and have been known to let her ride back in the puschair for the last 5 minutes whilst DD2 walks.

Occasionally DD1 has said she won't move another step and I worry that I won't be able to get her home. I even offer to carry her part of the way. In the final analysis I would call a taxi if I had to and pay the minimum charge.

Most days we make it back before a meltdown occurs. Thursdays for some reason are the worst day of the week.

I make sure DD is in bed by 6.30, earlier if she's falling asleep on the sofa.

I can't wait until the holidays.

"I really think you shouldn't shove a snack in them at the school gate. They get plenty of food at school - a school dinner the same size as an 11 year old would get or your own packed lunch plus a fruit snack"

Accept what you are saying in theory but a lot of 4/5yr olds don't eat much of their school dinner anyway. When I send my DD in with a pack lunch I can see if she hasn't eaten much and she can eat what's left on way home or a snack or two.

Don't agree with giving them big bags of sweets but nothing wrong with a cereal bar, raisins or a smoothie especially if they are likely to be too tired to eat much for tea.

My DD has school dinner, but comes home starving - eats a piece of fruit & a sandwich, then I refuse her anything else till supper which she eats as well