My daughter is 7 and in year 3.
Ever since we started pre-school, she has cried and got herself in a state in the mornings. She cried and had to be peeled off me every single morning, through 18 months of pre-school, reception, year 1, year 2 and into year 3.
We tried a number of things over the years, but she was a determined little so and so, although we've recently managed to crack the crying with her new year 3 teacher.
All fine.
Except, she's now started crying and getting herself worked up at bedtimes and at home in the mornings
She refuses to go to bed, stay in bed and go to sleep. We've had the same bedtime routine for years and she's always, until recently, been really good at bedtime (bath, supper, bed by 7.15pm, 15 minutes of reading, lights out and sound asleep by 8pm), but she thinks that by refusing to go to bed/sleep, she'll be too tired to go to school the next day - she's still up messing around until midnight sometimes
In the mornings she's impossible to get up. Refuses to eat breakfast, I have to fight her into her clothes, make her clean her teeth, and lately she's been late to school as she just refuses to walk (won't ride her bike or use her scooter either). She just flat out refuses. Tantrums and sit down protests aplenty and she's getting too big and strong to shove under my arm and carry her.
We did have some initial success with a sticker chart - we gave her stickers for going to bed, staying in bed, going to sleep, getting up, eating breakfast, etc and if she got a certain amount of stickers she got to hold her hamster when she got home from school, and also to earn extra PC time. Now when we remind her of her stickers she doesn't care
She does have some special needs and is currently being assessed (this has been ongoing for sometimes now) - initially, it was thought she was dyspraxic (she ticks every single dyspraxic box) but following an OT assessment they are now looking at ADHD and Aspergers, but the trouble is she seems to have a foot in the door of all developmental disorders so untangling her is taking it's time.
In the meantime she's getting further and further behind at school, the gap between her peers is widening, she's beginning to notice this and she's finding it massively frustrating.
She has zero concentration, no working memory, her maths is awful and reading even worse. Her spellings consist of words like bus and cat (which she still consistently spells wrong) and she's noticing her friends are on stuff like orchestra and shuttlecock.
School are fantastic - she's on an IEP, gets 1-2-1 time every day, gets a lot of 1 on 1 help in class, they've provided twiddle sticks, coloured sheets for reading, a wiggle cushion, a privacy board, sloped desks, a pop up tent where she goes when it all gets a bit overwhelming, etc, etc.
She's happy when she's actually at school. She's very sociable and is popular, has lots of friends and gets on well with everyone. Works hard, tries even harder and loves her teacher who is very supportive but DD's very disillusioned and disheartened
I was so pleased that we'd cracked the crying, but we just seem to have transferred it to evenings/mornings at home, so any ideas please?
Thank you!
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Daughter absolutely hates going to school - what can I do?
19 replies
freddiefrog · 14/11/2012 09:35
OP posts:
LindyHemming ·
15/11/2012 20:50
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Welovecouscous ·
17/11/2012 10:46
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