Ahhh- help! I keep changing my mind about a school dilemma!

[Schoolworries]

I really confused about the best decision to make regarding my dd who has just finished year 1. I will need to apply for a junior place for her within the next few months.

We live in a semi-rural village with a lovely infant school, but no junior school. All my neighbours with children older have had horrible problems getting their dc's into decent schools. However, after months of appealing they do seem to have gotten places.

I have put dd's name down on other schools waiting lists for the past year but she is right at the bottom of the lists.

However we found out a school that is approx. 17 minutes drive away in my dad's village has just come up with 5 spaces as a lot of children have moved to private or abroad.

It is the best school on paper out of all in a 5 mile radius, the SATS results are in the high 90's and it is a feeder school for one of the best secondary schools in the area.

So we have applied for a transfer.

However Im getting cold feet... the hour of driving every day back and forth will cost us about £1300 a year and that is a lot of money to us. Im worried about the drive being to much, especially as I have a baby.

The other issue is that the secondary school requires to you attend the feeder and live in catchment but the prices are sky-high and unless we can afford the extra £100k to move within 5 years the only way we will get in is if not many people apply to the secondary the year that we do. If dc doesnt get in she wont be able to attend with her new friends.

Im so torn.

Do we take the opportunity now for an excellent school , and know that the driving and cost is the sacrifice or do we keep dd where she is for now and see if she gets offered the junior most people go to?

Ahhh! I appreciate any thoughts. Thank you :)

Is the other school a primary? Sorry, completely baffled as to why you are on all sorts of waiting lists for junior schools when you shouldn't even have applied yet...

She is at an infant school in a village? You are contemplating moving her in September to a primary that is 17minutes drive away, instead of applying in October to potentially oversubscribed junior schools for sept 2013, and leaving her where she is for another year at the current infants (y2) ? Is that right?

If it's such a great school, why have 5 spaces suddenly come up in y1, why are they choosing to pay to go private, if they are in a fab primary?

She is not on waiting lists for juniors, just other primary schools.

Yes we are thinking of moving her this September into the good school- or the alternative is too keep her where she is and apply for the junior as normal.

I have no idea madwoman! I think a majority are moving abroad, Im not sure about why the others would now choose private.

Ah ok, that makes much more sense.

Is dd happy where she is? Do all the other kids in the primary live in your dad's village?

I drove 3 kids to three different settings for a few years. I was bloody grateful that they then ended up at the same primary, a hundred yards from the house. This year they are all at different places again, but there are buses. (we move a lot)

I think because mine have moved so frequently, I'm fairly sanguine about trying to make 'be-all-and-end -all' choices. They never are, and there are always other alternatives if it doesn't work out. A lengthy commute for school is a definite pisser though, especially where siblings are concerned. Are you likely to put the baby in a separate setting or go back to work within the next five years? Will the baby start yr r whilst dd is still at the primary? Is there a sibling priority rule? Or a likelihood that the baby won't get a place? I know it's faintly bizarre to be thinking so downstream, but tbh either you say you'll suck it and see, or you try to analyze to the nth degree.

Dd1 actually started school in a town we'd never been to at all. it was fine.

She is very happy where she is and excelling! That's what makes it diffcult.

I have thought about baby too already but that just gives me more headaches! From what I understand the school is normally very popular, this year is just an exception so unless we have managed to move into the area Im not sure if she would get in too, I suppose as sibling she would but it all depends. However Im not sure I would want to keep such a trek up and would probably apply for a nearer primary that time around.

Im worried that right now if we dont take the school place, we will be the unlucky ones who get given the awful school and still fail the appeal :(

Maybe its how it works here but from what i gather from the lea admissions booklets and people who attend seperate infant/junior schools here is

the infant is normally a feeder for a linked junior.

so here in my suberb we have 2separate schools 1 infant and 1junior same name , different heads, but next door to each other , think they share a playing feild in this case as looked at this school myself the infant head said transfsferal was automatic unless we decided to apply elsewhere

The words I think were common transfer agreement.

daughters freind goes to separate infant junior again locally.

in this case same name, different heads but down the road from each other and staggered finishing times so if picking up from 2 sites its doable. again from what i gather one linked to the other so kidds who attended the linked infants have priority.

I myself moved towns at age 7moved from a village primary to new town but junior school which hated at first as nearly everyone came from same infants.

They seemed to have moved away from that now and the whole county where mum still lives is all primaries.

I prefer primaries as more continuity.
its why I picked my eldests a small va rc primary.
another factor for me was 3kids , commute.
my 2nd child starts the preschool within school grounds in sept so one place to pick up and drop off and the local private nursery where hoping son will start in jan be less than 15mins away.

Good luck with what you decide. personally i think i would hold fire speak to the lea as seems daft to have no feeder junior as all the freinds made in infant be split and as you say shes doing well.

Thanks mam29.

There is no feeder at all. There a number of infant schools fighting it out for the juniors!

It does worry me as quite a few from dd class will be ahead of us now on the admissions with sibling links when they apply. As dd is my eldest I wont have that advantage.

Even if she gets into the school, there is the chance not all her friends will. Even if she gets in, she might not get a place on the school bus so I will have to drive 40 minutes a day anyway.

Tough one...

When we were in your situation (sep inf with no feeder and an array of juniors) dd1 went to the out of county juniors, with only one girl she knew. It was fine. The rest of her cohort (58 children) were spread between the other four more local schools.

We moved after a year anyway. She's in her seventh school, and will start yr 8 in her 8th. her choice this time. For the first time.

Mad how long was the drive to the out of county juniors? If it was a long drive was it ok?

Well, I had dd2 in nursery, which was about a ten minute drive, then ds in infants (which was only five minutes from the house - twenty minute walk, but had to drive because of the other two) then the juniors was about fifteen minutes from there - during the school run, anyway. Faster all other times

I then drove forty minutes to uni myself. Had a mixture of child minders, after school clubs and nursery until 6pm so that I could get home (longer in the rush hour). Some days I had to go to dh's work after the drop off's to change car, as he was going to do the pick-ups and car seats etc... so it wasn't as easy as just one school run and done, it was an ongoing saga.

It was possible, and I did it, but it wasn't much fun. Mine were past squalling stage, too.

You should be able to find out through your local council whether the school in your dad's village has sibling priority. Whether it does or doesn't, it might change in the next few years.

Personally, I wouldn't do this. But if you want to, could Dd stay at your dad's sometimes, maybe 1-2 nights per week?

Agree with finding out about the sibling rule. If that was the case, I'd probably go for it. 17mins drive is nothing really. Esp if you live in a village with no schools beyond primary level. A drive is pretty much unavoidable, isn't it?

Re-reading your post, I actually think you're gonna need a long-term strategy here. You say even bringing the baby into it makes your head ache, understandably, but the secondary catchment issue is a problem too. Sounds like a move is going to be inevitable and if you can't afford the secondary catchment then it might have to be a move further afield. Is that a possibility? if so, just go with what keeps your daughter happy and settled for now and look to planning ahead for a move that makes more sense, because where you are now sounds like a whole load of problems to come. Unless you can swap houses with your dad maybe?? Assuming he's in catchment for the good places.

Thanks for the posts. I did a test drive and it was only 10 mins and that was the long route.

I think we will keep weighing our options up.

Try working out the dates, but there will probably only be a one year overlap between your children at school, unless you have others inbetween. It's not so bad if just for one year. Also what happens at secondary level, is she still likely to get a place somewhere? Lots of children around here go to different secondary schools, and they all cope, many secondaries mix up children in classes anyway, so she might still not be with her closest friends anyway.