Year 6 awards assembly......

[Keiza]

Sorry if sound like a pushy Mum but

My DD had her assembly yesterday where awards were given to pupils for their achievements of the past year, one of the awards they receive is for attendance, I watched as several of her classmates got their certificate but none for DD, why? I asked, well its because she had ONE day off for the whole year so it wasn't a 100% attendance. The day she was absent for was when she attended her Aunts funeral, am I right to feel somewhat aggrieved that she has been penalised for this. I know it's only a small thing but she has worked so hard this year and I think it's sad the school couldn't recognise this.

dancergirl, its easy to say that if you don't have a child with a chronic (and my DDs case a life limiting) condition. The awards may not be aimed at people like us but unfortunately its a fairly large brush to sweep through a school and we most definitely get caught up in it

Even at 5 DD is well aware that she is 'different' to her friends and I have lost count of the times she has told me she wishes she didn't have to take all the medication she does and just be like everyone else. This is likely to translate over time into anger towards the condition.

So imagine how she will feel over the next few years that at the beginning of each September, knowing will never get 100% attendance all thanks to the annual hospital review she has to have all because she has this condition? I kind of feel she is going to resent it even more.

If she has to take a couple of days off sick due to a D&V bug or chicken pox say then I actually don't have a problem with her not getting a certificate as these are common childhood bugs and its just the luck of the draw as to who comes down with them.

For her and others in her position, some sort of recognition should be given for them getting into school on every day they possibly can outside of hospital appointments and admissions. As I've said before, kids with serious health conditions actually probably make more effort to get into school and at the moment their endeavours don't have much chance of being recognised

Mintyneb I'm so sorry to hear about your little girl, feeling emotional today anyway as my dd is leaving primary school but your post made me well up

I do take your point but these attendance awards are only one v small aspect of school awards/rewards in general. She will probably never get an attendance award but she could get awards for countless other things. And how do you know that she ISN'T getting recognition for her attendance? It may not be in the form of something official like a certificate but do you not think her teachers really admire her? Or she might have got a mention in assembly or something like that. There was a girl at our school who had a lot of time off due to a leg operation. She didn't get an attendance certificate but I know for a fact that the whole school knew about her and all staff and pupils were incredibly proud of her. That must surely mean more than a certificate given out with other children...?

I do think these days, schools seem under a lot of pressure to please everyone. Parents, children and staff. Years ago, there wasn't so much parental involvement and I really do think it worked better. Schools are there to provide education for your children, keeping parents happy shouldn't really come into it. Yes of course it's good to be involved with your children's education but to question/complain every little thing the school does is a bit OTT.

And with awards, where do you draw the line in terms of 'fairness'? Is it fair that some children get awards for good effort when there are probably many children who work consistently well throughout the year? Would you really like a culture of 'everyone's a winner' and give out awards to everyone? I know it's a hard lesson to learn and no-one likes to see their children upset or disappointed but like everything in life there are winners and losers. And as some people on here have admitted, it's often the parents who are more upset about these things than the children!

But it is discrimination isn't it? My daughter has a chornic illness which is covered by the Disability Discrimination Act (DDA), meaning that it is recognised as a disability and she is protected by the DDA. Say she attends every single day of school apart from those two or three hospital appointments per year that cannot be arranged outside of school hours. Surely that is discrimination, the only reason she'd not be receiving the attendance certificate is directly due to her disability. To me that is discrimination against a disability. It doesn't matter that there are plenty of other awards she might qualify for, the point is that due to her disability she is being excluded from potentially receiving or even trying for the attendance reward, something that other children without a chronic illness are not excluded from trying to achieve. We're not asking for "everyone is a winner", we're asking for concessions with chronic illness hospital appointments so that our children are not discriminated against.

No, Dancergirl, it's NOT that the parents are more upset than the children, it's that we are upset BECAUSE our DC's are upset about this.

They already have enough shit to deal with, without being made to feel like they are going to fail at this.

My DS2 will never get a certificate for sports, as he isn't very good at them due to his muscle problems and asthma. He won't get an award for academic things as he has LD's. And he won't get an award for attendance, because his will be unlikely to ever even hit the 95% that is required at our school.

What is left? He puts in effort - but they always reward the 'naughty' DC's with that one...

He gets upset, hence I get upset!

Tbh I felt worse about the friendship prize being given to the boy who has mercilessly bullied my ds.

couthymow, I wasn't directing my post at you but someone did say above that the parents get more upset about this sort of thing than the children. But even if it is the children getting upset, it is about managing that upset/disappointment. Many, many children not just those with long-term illnesses or disabilities never get awards at school (I was one of those children!) and it is up to parents to boost their self-esteem in other ways and reassure them that in the long-run it doesn't matter at all. Would getting a certificate for good attendance really make a significant difference to their happiness at school?

And whilst yes of course it is unfair to children with long-term illnesses (or even with short-term illnesses), there are many, many MORE children who take time off school for poor reasons and those are the ones that these awards just might make them think twice about. I suppose ideally they should take into account unauthorised absences only but maybe that makes it complicated. Isn't it a good thing to encourage good attendance for all, even if it isn't your child winning one? What about the child whose attendance is normally a bit lax but has made a real effort to get to school every day?

NO ... it is so simple, really ... why can't people comprehend this?

100% attendance in a primary school age child is more like a fluke than good behaviour that should be rewarded.

My dc have won the certificate once or twice. But that would probably be in a spring or summer term when they weren't sick with a very bad cold, d&v, ear infection, chicken pox etc.

It is nigh on impossible for a healthy child to achieve, let alone a little one with a condition that results in a lot of illness or the need to attend a lot of appointments.

It is an utterly stupid and indefensible "carrot" used to tackle lax parenting.

My children got awards for their attendance this year - but it is rewarding the luck that they have only been ill at weekends or holidays this year.

It is largely a reward for parents for not taking their DCs on term time holidays.

Whilst I'm all for increasing school attendance this really does seem pretty pointless. It is clearly discriminating against children with disabilities or chronic illnesses, which as others have said much more eloquently than me simply wouldn't be allowed in the big wide world. Plus the average child will fall ill at least once or twice a year.

Also as an incentive to increase attendance, those who can't be bothered to ensure their children attend well aren't going to give a damn about a certificate. And those who want to save money by going on holiday in term time aren't going to trade in that saving to get their DC an attendance certificate!

So brolley should we stop trying to reach out to those families whose children have poor attendance because 'they won't give a damn about a certificate'? How would you suggest better attendance is encouraged then?

It seems to me that sometimes we are so concerned for our own child/children we sometimes forget to look at the bigger picture.

Re the DDA, I have a question purely out of interest: what about awards for sports for example if you had a child in a school who was unable to take part in any PE due to disability? Would that count as discrimination?

tiggytape if there was only an achievement award for sport and not improvement, would that bother you regarding discrimination?

Similarly, if there was a most improved attendance along with a 100% attendance award, would that seem fairer to you?

The whole award system is riddled with issues whichever way you look at it!

DS didn't have 100% attendance because he spent three days off doing 11+ exams or going to look at secondary schools at the beginning of Year 6. He was within the education system just not at his school. Given that he also had to do 11+ exams on Saturdays, personally I would have said it was all education-related activity and should not have been counted as absence at all.