When should my DD start wearing a bra

[minesawine]

Hi - I have a DD who is just finishing Year 4. She is very slim but over the past few months her breasts have really developed. She is very shy about it and wears her vest all the time, even if it is really sunny.

She will be going into year 5 in September and the boys and girls will still change together in the classroom for PE. She is so conscious of anyone seeing her and I know it will be worse next year.

I think at 10 she is too young to wear a bra, but if she is developing then perhaps she should, but she would also hate for the boys to see her bra. Maybe a bra with a vest over it is the answer, but would that look really silly.

I am not sure what to do for the best.

How about a crop top style bra, its a good compromise between bra and vest IMO.

I'd actually contact the school about this and say that the children need to change separately (not unusual from yr 5, surely?).

Imo year 5 is too old to stiol be chamging together. From yr3 we changed in the appropriate toilets.

Could you buy her some crop top type bras and a few white vests to wear over if she prefers a vest? Am just thinking for support.

Even if you succeed with ensuring separate changing, she will still need some "support", ideally. Usually girls want something to stop nipple chafing, too.
DD is in y5 & some of her classmates have worn a bra since start of the year. Almost all of them already wear crop tops, they feel very self-conscious about their chests, no matter how flat & undeveloped. Even though they have girls only changing for PE.

(British people are so shy about their bodies!)

If she needs a bra she needs it. It's a physical thing.

I think that this is too old for the kids to be changing together. I'd have a word with the school.
You can buy little crop top things from M&S and other places which are ideal - the cover up, stop rubbing, but aren't really bras.
She may think a vest too childish.

Thanks for the advice. I am going to speak to the school about separate changing. And I think I will buy her some crop tops for support.

What about a vest with built in support? Hmm. At our school, it's only Year 6 that change separately. My year 4's still change together in the classroom. TBH, if she had a crop top on and a vest over the top that would give much more coverage than a bra and a vest. Definitely let her pick though!

My DD (in y5) finally got a bra this Easter, at just turned 10y. TBH she could have done with one before then, but she was wearing cropped tops for a year before that.

There is absolutely no way DD would get changed in front of a boy now - I doubt she'd have wanted to last year either as she was already developing quite obviously a year ago. DD is in a girl's school so we don't have this issue but surely ALL primary schools should have separate changing facilities for this age - it's not fair on these young children especially at a time when they might be feeling very conscious of their changing bodies anyway.

Speak to school and ask them how they can manage this. It cannot be the first time this issue has come up - lots of girls this age are developing.

A sports bra top would be ideal !

I've worked in schools where the boys change in the cloakroom and the girls in the classroom. It is do-able and necessary imo.