Support for ds who has stopped engaging in school

[LadyInDisguise]

Really my question has 2 parts.
1- ds is good in maths (he is at a level 4c in Y3). His teacher acknowledges that his reasoning is excellent, there are no issues with his understanding but he still making mistakes so she is reluctant to make do things that are harder. In her opinions, the mistakes are because he wants to go very fast and he doesn't treat the exercises seriously. He has stopped progressing (her evaluation of his level was already a 4c in February and she says others are catching up with him when he was way ahead a few months ago).
Seeing how he is at home, I think he is bored and has started to disengaged from it. He enjoys challenges and thrives on them. Give him something difficult to do and he will make few mistakes. Give him something easy and he won't be careful, do things quickly and wo care.
Obviously there are just a few weeks left of this year but the issue will still the same next year and his teacher has already said that they will spend the first few months gong over stuff next year anyway. Which will not help the situation.
Not sure what to about it or how to address the situation. Any idea?

2- Different subject: spelling. How do you 'make' a child applying what he has learnt re spelling? ds spelling isn't good. On paper is doing quite well (again well above average) but these are 'spelling test' where they are asked to write words down. He also knows all the rules etc.. (when to double consonants, how ending are changing depending on blabla). But when it comes to writing a text, all that goes out of the window and his spelling is bad.
What can you do to help him apply the 'rules'?

bump

I think you might get some more help with the maths question on the g&t board, as there are people on there with more experience of that kind of thing. Have you spoken to the school about the boredom and what did they say?

Re. the spelling thing, I've had it explained to me that writing a long piece, it takes children a while to learn to keep everything - plot, sentence structure, handwriting, spelling - in their heads while they write, and spelling is generally the one that gives. Although in my DD's case it's the handwriting... Again, I'd ask the teachers whether they think there is a problem.

I am just coming back from a meeting with the teacher...

I tried to explain the issue re being disengaged and thriving on challenges but she always came back to 'yes but he is making mistakes so I can't give him stuff that is more complex'.
She said she would be talking to another teacher (who is also the SENCO) and see what could be done. Also have a word with next year teacher.
I did emphasize that I wasn't sure what is the answer and wanted to work with them. And that my issue isn't about grades (which it really isn't) but about what he is learning about work ethics/methods/attitudes if he is already disengaging.
So no real answer yet...

re the spelling.... she had nothing to say apart from the fact that he 'just need to apply the rules he knows'.
I have noticed though that they do some writing work. She is reading them, commenting on them but words that are spelt wrong aren't highlighted and he isn't made to correct them.
So he keeps writing them wrong which just reinforce the 'wrong spelling' iyswim.

I have similar thing with dd2 in year 3.
She is, and always has been, naturally very good at maths, but dashes it or daydreams and doesn't complete it.

I remember giving her a word question in year R which involved her working out about 3-4 steps, including division. She got it all right until the last step which was 14 + 1 to which (having lost interest) she said 19... no 20.
That was absolutely typical of her. Do all the hard bit then fall down on the easy bit!

Last term after parents evening I spoke to her about her maths. Because the comments were, "good understanding, doesn't usually complete, makes silly mistakes".

She's competitive, so I explained to her that these issues were going to make others beat her in tests. We worked out a task for her to do on her maths. She looks at the questions and tries to do as many right in the first 5 minutes. She then checks those.
If they're all right, she then works out how many she did in 5 minutes, and how long it should take her to do the lot, and gives herself that challenge. Because she is concentrating just on doing the sums and not on chattering and maybe thinking about doing the sums, she generally gets them right. Since then she's often the first to finish with them all right. It's worked so far.

If it was my child I'd do the more complex stuff at home and make little home made workbooks for him to take to school with his working in. I'd also make sure the work we did was exciting, imaginative and entertaining, the type of stuff kids just love to talk about.

Then I'd explain to him why the teacher is so inflexible and just won't do this kind of work with him because he keeps making little mistakes in his easy work. She doesn't like it and if he wants to do exciting maths with her he needs to try really hard with his easy work and not make mistakes. Then I'd practice working really hard with the easy work with him and have plans of how to check that no mistakes have been made or how to find and correct any.

Essentially, I'd motivate him, because clearly the teacher is inflexible.

Yes I have been mulling over it and though I would be doing some 'work' with him at home.
Things that he enjoys (maths,calculations etc...) whilst teaching him some basic skills in 'presentation' (atm everything is all over the place which is also one reason why he is making mistakes).
I also have been working my way through similar threads re spelling issues and will start to do some work with him on that too.

BTW what I am hoping is that he will avoid these 'easy to fix mistakes' (according to her) so that there is no more reason not to 'challenge him'.

And try and restore his love for maths by doing some at home.

Interestingly enough, she has being moaning that 'ds did his subtraction the wrong way' saying his dad had showed his how to do it. And then said that if I was teaching him something new, she would very happy if I was telling her because then she would build up on it.

bump for the afternoon. If anyone has any ideas :)

I'd been pondering this too, and thinking that I'd do about that - spend the summer fixing the weaknesses so that she - or whoever you get next year - has no excuse. Some online stuff might make it fun.

But I'd also find some activities which are stretching but completely different - I have no idea what your DS likes but we've been recommended a young astronomers club for example - to remind him that learning isn't just at school and is interesting. That might help with school in the longer run too.

Thanks one.
It is difficult to handle.
I saw his teacher this am. She was telling me about some experiments they did yesterday, where they were looking at how long it would take a 'stone' to absorb a certain quantity of water.
Apparently ds went to see her and explained there was an issue with the experiment because the surface of each sample was different and therefore the amount of water/time it would take to be absorbed would be different.....
I am not sure that there is anyway she can address that sort of discussion in a Y3 class....
That's what makes the 'oh but he is making mistakes' even more difficult to deal with. We all know there is no understanding issue underlying them.

I will look at clubs like this in the area. Not very hopeful as it is a bit the back of beyond but I might get surprised.

Goodness. It is boredom, isn't it. In which case it is a) rather more school's problem and they need to address it and b) a sit down as suggested above explaining that he has to do the ordinary stuff too might be useful.

Could you suggest to school that they give him something more difficult anyway? Although if he's moving up to a new teacher next year, that might be a fresh start for everyone.

Also, does your county do g&t extension days for science? Ours does starting yr3, and perhaps you could persuade them to send him to those.