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To Kumon or not to Kumon. That is the question.

999 replies

megabored · 17/06/2012 00:28

DD is starting school in September. Below are the Pros and Cons I have been debating recently.

  1. She is bright, so should be okay without extra help in school
  2. It is too early to put her through this
  3. Kumon is expensive and time consuming.

The Pros

  1. It may give her that bit of extra confidence at school
  2. Earlier is better as then she can grow with that system
  3. Its not so expensive as to be prohibitive.

I really cant decide either way. Please someone help?

OP posts:
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CecilyP · 20/06/2012 13:08

I think you will find that phonics is the only way you will reliably be able to work out new words for yourself. If you have a great visual memory, of course you can remember words you are told, but no more than that.

i am not happy seeing dds lack of confidence when put against a say another kid in class who does kumon and therefore is ahead of the rest of the group. No matter how many apples and cheerios we count, my dd will not be as fast in mental arithmetic due to lack of practice.

OP, go to Kumon if you want, teach your child to write if you want (just make sure you teach correct letter formation) but I think you are worrying totally unecessarily. I think your dd will do really well at school for the following reasons:

1 She is a girl
2 She is old in year
3 She is able to make recognisable drawings of all sorts of things and chooses to do this - just not in preschool
4 You have already told us she is bright.
5 She has intelligent, educated parents
6 She has interested parents who will make time for her

Will confidence come from being good at maths? As someone who was good at maths in early years, I would say it is pretty irelavent. The confident popular girls seemed to be the ones who could make up complex fantasy games that lasted the whole of playtime - not something you can really get from a class.

Chandon · 20/06/2012 13:19

phonics did and does not work for my dyslexic DS, at all. It works for my other DS though.

So defo not the only way.

megabored · 20/06/2012 13:20

cecily you may be right. That I am worrying unnecessarily. All I am trying to do us decrease the probability that I am worrying un - necessarily.

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mummytime · 20/06/2012 13:22

The other key thing about Asia, especially Chinese and Japanese culture, is the lack of our British idea of some children being naturally "cleverer" than others. They expect every child in a class to be able to "do it".

morethanpotatoprints · 20/06/2012 13:28

But what is the point of pushing even further if the child is already capable. I can see the point in giving/offering extra support when needed. The school day is long enough without pushing academics further.
If my dd came home and said "Please mum can I do some maths worksheets theyr'e really fun", then I might consider it. All too often parents think its coming from the kids but more often its the parents pushing.
I had same problem with dd and music. However, she considers herself a musician not somebody learning to play instruments. If they consider themselves mathematicians then yes of course you would support and encourage all the way. But surely not to be the best in the class just for the sake of it when they could be having fun. There will always be somebody better than you at something. What are you going to do, push every subject you find.

PooshTun · 20/06/2012 13:34

@Cecily -

"Will confidence come from being good at maths? As someone who was good at maths in early years, I would say it is pretty irelavent. The confident popular girls seemed to be the ones who could make up complex fantasy games that lasted the whole of playtime - not something you can really get from a class."

Nothing to do with Kumon but my niece as a child was naturally gifted at maths. Her older sister was the popular and funny one. She was also the sporty one and the pretty one. She was, as some people might put it, the complete package.

Being good at maths didn't make her popular but it gave her confidence because she knew that in this one area she was better than everyone else.

My point? Being good at something gives you confidence even if it doesn't make you popular.

exoticfruits · 20/06/2012 13:39

Each to their own - if you are convinced of the merits of Kumon then I dare say it will work.
On the inflexibility - it wasn't the fact that I was insisting they use my method but just that their mind was blocked in that the Kumon way was THE method for everyone.
My DS got top marks at GCSE and A'level without it and the really top Maths brains that I have taught e.g the yr 5 boy going to the secondary school once a week for Maths never touched it - he was however playing chess for the county.
By all means use it if you wish to pay out and like worksheets, but it is only one way - I wish that I had come up with it and sold the franchises because there seems little competition!

PooshTun · 20/06/2012 13:49

The other key thing about Asia, especially Chinese and Japanese culture, is the lack of our British idea of some children being naturally "cleverer" than others. They expect every child in a class to be able to "do it".

I've never lived in Japan so I can comment there but during my time in HK it often struck me how the people seem to have no limit on their expectations or aspirations when it comes to their children. If the child isn't academic then you enrol him for extra lessons. If the piece of music is too hard to play then increase the time you allocate to practice and so on.

Its 'funny' how we roll our eyes and go pushy foreigners because the flip side of the coin is that they look at us, roll their eyes and go [I'll leave you to fill in the blanks] :)

megabored · 20/06/2012 13:52

exotic why r u and other posters stuck on being anti worksheets?! How many times and in how many ways do I have to say that 'yes, we r already using other metjods', including door number counting and image native play such as playing 'Shopping'!!!! Hmm
I am really exhausted by this conversation. Again going around in circles!

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exoticfruits · 20/06/2012 13:55

It depends on your DC - mine wouldn't respond well to the Chinese/Japanese way and neither would I. We tend to see the success stories and not the casualties.

megabored · 20/06/2012 13:57

posh it is not the Chinese or the Singaporean or the Indian growth that is suffering. I wonder why?!

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exoticfruits · 20/06/2012 13:58

I don't know why my views on worksheets are upsetting you! By all means use them if you want to. If you believe in something it tends to work. I don't like them so they tend not to. I am not against them altogether_ everything has its place.

exoticfruits · 20/06/2012 13:59

I had a wonderful visit to Singapore - loved it but I wouldn't want to live there.

PooshTun · 20/06/2012 14:03

"By all means use it if you wish to pay out and like worksheets, but it is only one way"

I never said that it wasn't. But I still have no idea why people are against it.

I get it that the Let Children Be Children Brigade are against children being pushed at that age so I am assuming that they are against other methods as well and not just Kumon.

Assuming that you see the value of paid tuition, what turns you off with regards to Kumon and how does your preferred method turn you on?

As it is, all I hear is anecdotes about how it didn't work for some children.

megabored · 20/06/2012 14:06

exotic why not? I bet the Singaporeans would be flexible and would LOVE to live anywhere (within reason!) to broaden their horizons! Hmm

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PooshTun · 20/06/2012 14:08

"I had a wonderful visit to Singapore - loved it but I wouldn't want to live there"

Same here. It was kind of weird waiting to cross a traffic free road in the middle of the night and no one would cross because the crossing lights were still red.

I'm not sure whether it was because they are indocrinated into obeying rules even when it doesn't make sense or whether the Singaporean traffic enforcement officers hide in the bushes ready to hand out jay walking citations :)

megabored · 20/06/2012 14:13

posh no, they are against kumon. The name. It does not make sense! What did Shakespeare say about a rose?! As I said earlier, if I was purchasing cbeebies books or spending same or similar amount on printer ink trawling day after day for 'free' workbooks, no one would bat an eyelid. This is the same sort of snobbery as buying second had designer goods but turning snobby at buying brand new items at ASDA!Hmm

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exoticfruits · 20/06/2012 14:15

I think that we just need to agree to differ. If people think that Kumon is wonderful they shouldn't need everyone else to validate it. Mine are long past needing it. If I felt they needed extra I wouldn't use Kumon. I don't expect everyone to come to the same conclusion.

I really don't think that Singaporeans would want to live anywhere!
I wouldn't say no to a couple of years -but no more.
It is too hot, it is city living, I wouldn't want to drive , it was too crowded and the DCs would go to international schools anyway. My friend's DC s were getting an education just like at home. The DD was in the middle of AS levels.

megabored · 20/06/2012 14:17

I've lived in singapore and love it. It's a lovely piece of heave in the chaos that can be Asia. I would not want to go to school there. But that is not this thread! Grin

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exoticfruits · 20/06/2012 14:18

I never saw the roads clear - you would have taken your life in your hands to cross on red! I didn't like the fact that we never saw the police but were told they would be there in seconds if needed!

megabored · 20/06/2012 14:19

I do not think kumon is wonderful. I do not need any validations. I am trying to understand people's prejudice against it and the branding of people who use it.

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exoticfruits · 20/06/2012 14:21

I have said mine and then they get pulled apart line by line! It has done nothing to change my mind and so I think we need to agree to differ.

megabored · 20/06/2012 14:23

exotic okay. That's fair. Maybe I will
Come to the same conclusion after
Trying it and you can tell me 'i told u
So'. But there we are.

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exoticfruits · 20/06/2012 14:26

One thing is for sure you won't know unless you try!
I believe that you can get free taster sessions sometimes.

PooshTun · 20/06/2012 14:28

"I never saw the roads clear"

It depends on where you go. Its like London West End. One moment you can be dodging buses, taxis and crazy messenger bikers on Oxford Street and the next you can be down traffic-light Waldour Street or Curzon Street.

"I didn't like the fact that we never saw the police but were told they would be there in seconds if needed!"

It is a virtually crime free country which is partly due to its socio economic situation, a zero tolerance towards anti social activities (chewing gum in a public place is a fine-able offence) and a populace that will stand there walking for the lights to change, even though there are no cars coming and its in the middle of the night.