DD ending reception soon and still hates reading

[Chestnutx3]

Will she get it eventually? I'm at a loss what to do, signed up to reading chest for the holidays, she gets a book a night at school to read but she doesn't seem to have the love of reading.

I read all the time, house full of books. I was like Matilda, a house with no books but I was very academic, I just can't understand her.

She would never read given half the chance. She loves listening to book CDs, and loves all sports but doesn't like picking up a book. She is read to every night. I've tried everything. I'm so sad she doesn't love reading. She loves being with people, she is a real extrovert I think its her ideal of hell curling up in a corner and reading a book.

I've tried backing off for a term but she got worse at school and seem to go backwards in reading level, the teachers noticed. I do feel like giving up again as I think she has to get there on her own but she is falling behind at school.

You mentioned she loves audiobooks and I think you've got a big plus there. They can expose your child to more interesting stories and vocabulary than they can yet read to themselves.As others have said, just relax a little, especially if she is learning to read well.

My ds was a capable reader (level 3 yr 2) but was about 8 before he became what he is now - an absolute bookworm - and it was the 'How to Train Your Dragon' books on cd which kicked it off. He reads 600 page novels easily now but still likes books on cd. I buy books, but borrow audiobooks from the library because they are expensive. And now his choices can range from picturebooks/Dr Seuss through to adult fiction or heavy non-fiction (now aged 11). Just try not to worry/be too prescriptive about what counts as 'loving books'!

She sounds very like my DS (was good at reading for his age, loved being read to but hated reading himself). In his case he found reading a chore at this stage and was frustrated that what he could read himself was so much less interesting than what mum or dad could read to him.

He started enjoying reading half way through year 3. Of course I am now sorry for what I wished for as I seem to be going up every night and telling him to stop reading and get some sleep!!

The one thing I will suggest is to get reading for pleasure going is to give your child books that she will find really easy - kind of like as an adult you would go for light reading rather than War and Peace.

Another mum here with a struggler through reception and year 1!! Its all clicked this year (yr 2) and she is now exactly where she should be with reading. Iam so very relieved!!!!

I found that the reading challenge held at the library every summer was brilliant last year. I just let her choose her own books and she loved the prizes they gave out every time she read two books and brought them back.

I tried to hold on to the belief that the fact that she loved stories even though she hated reading was always going to be a good sign

Unfortunately books that DD would find easy are also the very boring ones, she is ORT 5/6 now towards the end of reception. How she got there with so little practice is beyond me. However she started off reception already on ORT 2/3 so she hasn't made as much progress as the teachers expected.

Are her old picture books still in her room? My ds rediscovered his when he could pick out the words for himself!

More messages of hope for you, Chestnut

I have read with all of both my dds' classes since Reception, and there are many kids who just don't enjoy reading much at one point or another - for some its Reception, others (boys especially, I noticed) around Y1 when other interests kicked in more. My dd1, an early reader, went off reading completely in Y1 - I was in despair, sad, etc (like you an avid reader since age of 3) and then backed off on the trying to make her like it bit. I gently insisted on some reading so as not to backslide, and she's gone back to liking reading - in spurts - since Y2. Now in Y3, she has just spent a whole day reading, by choice, and was unreachable for an entire afternoon with nose in books.

Your dd may well decided she likes reading later on - all she needs to do for now is not go completely off it, and be able to do it! But even if she doesn't, here's my kid brother as an example: he loathed reading all the way through school. Did it because he had to, never for enjoyment. Now, as an adult, he always has a book on the go and once even wrote a novel

Honestly, end of Reception is not a time to give up hope!

I think some people just use reading functionally rather than for enjoyment. My DH never reads for pleasure, it's just too passive for him. He likes playing strategy games on the computer or doing DIY or making models but he can't just sit and read. A film will just about hold his attention.

I love nothing more than curling up with a book or some sewing. Dd is still too little to read but it's taught me that regardless if whether she's like me or him so long as she can read and write fluently whether she loves it or not doesn't really matter.

Bribery worked really, really well through the dull books...

so long as she can read and write fluently whether she loves it or not doesn't really matter.

I absolutely agree with you, HappyCamel.

And there are times when we just have to see our children for who they are and what they are fabulous at. I'm a mathematical and outdoorsy person and used to joke about what I would do if any of my children struggled with Maths or hated hiking. Now they are here, I accept that they are individuals and not extensions of me and feel special pride when they are good at things I am rubbish at!!

We have a new game with DS (yr1). He's telly obsessed so we've started bringing up the Sky planner and going through asking him to read out the names of highlighted programs. Not book reading but it helps his reading

I also got him a "special" workbook for his non-school reading. He has the entire Roald Dahl collection and we've just started reading George's Marvellous Medicine together. When he's read 3 or 4 pages, we get his special book and write in it what he's read. I then get him to write what he enjoyed about it. We made the book extra special by covering it in wrapping paper together to prettify it. He doesn't have much reading stamina at the moment but he's getting better and he loves taking the special book to school to show his teacher how well he's doing

My OH started reading for pleasure about 5 years ago and he is much, much older than your DD

can I just say though, being at stage 5 at the end of reception is really, really good.

She may be bored with the books but she is doing really well.

Personally, I can still remember that the book that ignited reading for me was 'Five go down to the sea', gievn to me on my 8th birthday by my friend. I can remember being bored to death by 'wide range readers' reading scheme for years before that

Of course there's nothing wrong with not being an avid lover of books (she says through gritted teeth!) but it's far too early to write off OP's dc as such yet - until she is a fluent reader (and possibly even after then) you cannot know whether she will love reading as a leisure activity or not!

It's never too late ...as my OH demonstrates

Aha, ORT Stage 5/6. Well, the books IME (disclaimer for any fascinating books at this stage in other reading schemes and ORT ones that haven't come my way), are pretty DULL at this stage. It's a means to an end still- ie you need to get through that stage to learn to read but generally the books will not excite and stimulate a bright 5/6 year old who has been read to. Why would you want to read books like that when you can listen to a parent read something a lot more stimulating .

So.... hang on in there...... I bet this time next year she'll be reading all sorts of stuff. Yes, she does need to learn and keep going, but there's no big rush. And once you get to Stage 8/9/10 you can get off the scheme (at home at least) and onto all sorts of other books that are exciting and interesting and IME both child and parent enjoy together a lot more than the ORT etc stuff.

I think the tip to try to read some old picture books- together if she likes is a good one. I struggled to get DS to do this but he can be found reading them sometimes now. Some of it is confidence and this comes as their phonics improves- they may not have learnt enough at school yet to get that much further than the stage she is on easily.

thank you thank you thank you to the OP and all who replied so reassuringly! I am in the same place as OP with my YR ds and beginning to despair of a child who used to love picking out letters and words who now groans "boooring" when I talk to him about practising his rapidly back-sliding reading.

ds is like an alien to me when it comes to reading - I could read at age 3, never had my nose out of a book and famously packed 20 books aged 10 for our summer holiday and still didn't have enough to last the fortnight. He does enjoy books but when you've been enjoying Roald Dahl being read to you, who the hell wants to read for themselves about bloody Floppy and Biff etc.

you have all given me the courage to stop flapping and nagging and let him find it in his own time!

you're welcome, DU!!

I feel like its a calming batton being passed on.... MN was a sanity check for me over the last few years and, as always, the advise was spot on.

advice

It is so reassuring that quite a few of us are in the same boat. I do realise that my DC will be different to me, I had such a difficult childhood I had nothing to do other than watch TV or read books (like Matilda from a young age I went to the library on my own from a young age) and they have so many more opportunities. Reading DD The Secret Garden before bedtime, a book I didn't even know existed when I was a child, I think I'm loving it more than DD.

I feel the same about my DS and have done for years! DH and I (like a lot of people) read a lot and there are a lot of books in the house but DS has never been interested and has always seen reading as a hobby of ours that we try to infllict on him! He was always capable-I think he left Reception on ORT stage 5, got a level 3 at KS1 and is now a L5 nearing the end of Y5, but he just isn't very interested. I now take it as a personal mission to try to find books that interest him!

The Captain Underpants, Mr Gumm and Diary of a Wimpy Kid books grabbed him, but he doesn't like 'boy spy' books which a lot of the boys' books are focused on. He also enjoyed Series of Unfortunate events, some Pullman, Horrible Science, and some funnier ones like The Phantom Tolbooth and Origami Yoda. He likes audio books-particularly Harry Potter and Anthony Horowitz which I think open your mind to the scope of books available if you set your mind to it!!

I read to him a lot (I have two younger children as well-so often read to all of them) and try to cultivate a love of books rather than forcing him into it-but the expectation is that they read/listen to stories or go to sleep when in bed, so it's the lesser of two evils ;)

Don't worry! A boy joining my class this year (Y2) had to be bribed to read by his parents every night. They persevered. I persevered. He persevered. Last week, when he moved up a reading level he chose to take two books home to read that evening. He's got it! He's found reading is easy!

It's lovely!

I don't read for pleasure (unless you include mumsnet :) )...never have done.
I excelled academically (ending up in Maths/sciences). Don't worry. So long as she CAN read she will be fine.

It makes me sad reading this , I assume your DD is 5!

In most other countries children are not formally taught to read until they are 6 or 7. Research seems to suggest that this would be a more appropriate age to learn formally. There are many here who say they didn't read until 7.

My DS (now 7) refused the school reading books in YR. There was about one every 1/2 term and the teacher just said that he was doing fine. She was right - he liked the jolly phonics and did the reading at school but apart from that nothing was mentioned and no pressure.

So, if you say the task of YR is to foster a love of reading then the teacher shouldn't mention levels at all and leave her to learn at her own pace - R is still foundation stage!

I was getting nervous with DS in Y1 and after Xmas I made him read his school books, he did, he is average - but hated reading. Now at the end of Y2 he is still average and still hates reading.

He also prefers non-fiction. Now (at 7) I have started teaching him a bit more formally in his minority language (German) and he seems to take to it like a duck to water. He reads almost as good as in English, enjoys grammar, word games and I have started to give him texts (edited) about subjects he enjoys (planets, sea creatures etc) and let him colour nouns/verbs, black out words and he puts them back in, cut up texts/poems and he puts it back together. By the time we have finished with one text he has probably read it 5 times.

Maybe for some DC its just too early and they let you know.

Why does it make you sad that you want your DC to enjoy reading even at a young age?