How much time do your dc spend on the computer/wii/ds etc.?

[twoplusthree]

My ds is 7 and wants to go on all the time. I have limited it to mid week and weekends, but in between days he goes on and on about it. A lot of his friends at school talk about pokemon etc. all the time, and i think it is really sad and preventing him from wanting to play with other things. How do you manage computers because i think i am failing:(

Don't think you are failing at all. You are concerned and asking how to deal with it and not just letting him do what he wants, isn't that what most responsible parents do?

Our DS is just 8. We have a Wii but ita a family Wii and he can have an hour a day. He doesn't have a DS, but his Dad has one and he can use it sometimes, like if we have to take him to his sister's ballet class.

He does sometimes have computer time on top of the Wii time but to be honest the only thing he wants to look at usually is the website they use at school.

When he'd had his tonsils out a couple of years ago I let him play on the Wii for as long as he wanted. After two days of serious gaming he'd had enough and was begging me to do something else, perhaps that's something to try in the holidays .

DS (also 7) has between 30-60 minutes a day after school. Depending on what else he/we have on and whether his sister wants to use them also! He tends not to watch TV after school though, if he was watching TV as well, I think I'd limit this.

Can have up to a couple of hours a day at weekends.

I'm sure a couple of hours a week is fine.

Thank you for replies and reassurance. The problem with my ds is that he is really reluctant to come off the computer and then goes on and on about wanting to go on again. He can't seem to go on it then move onto something else without a fuss.

DS does that too. If he has unlimited access for any reason then he says it's boring.

Usually, I try and do the opposite - pack them all off in the garden to play. Then if they've had a few hours running and playing in the garden, done their homework, changed clothes, washed etc. then I let them have whatever they want. Usually, it's bedtime by then.
Weekends - saturday - they are busy all the day , in the evening I let them do whatever they want. Sundays I let them have whatever they want but still get them in the garden for a few hours.

They both love the mathletics site and cbeebies (still!!) on the family pc. Other than that there's the wii, the ipad, laptop and my mobile Everything has tons of apps on them. Hopefully, in app purchase is disabled properly....

Does he have a scooter or something that he enjoys? Is he an only? Mine start squabbling soon enough and forget they were whining about the wii.
DS loves to ride his scooter up and down at the front. He's allowed 2 lampposts to turn back in (He's 6).

My DSs are not allowed the Wii or DS during the week (Mon - Thu) and are only allowed on the computer for homework. (The exceptions are when they have playdates ) They are allowed unlimited access from Fri - Sun. It seems to work well as we are out and about over the weekends anyway :-)

He scooters to school and back, but is not at all keen on the great outdoors! We do get them out for a walk/bike ride at the weekends. Dd2 is 5 and very functional on the computer - she can go on for 30 mins then comes off of her own accord and go and do something else, but ds would happily be on all day every day if i let him. (I have given him unlimited access in holidays before, but he never seems to tire of it).

When the Wii arrived at Christmas, we asked the dcs to set ground rules themselves. Gobsmacked, but they said Saturday afternoons would be fine! So that's all they get.

They use my laptop for mathletics maybe once a week, but DS1 (8) is busy with clubs, and DS2 would rather watch tv if he is offered screen time.

My DS would happily spend hours and hours staring at the computer. We would let him because it was easy! However, he was ratty, not sleeping well and our consciences were prickly...soooo..we've reduced computer times to Friday nights and an hour each day at the weekend..the rest of the time, we have been hoisting ourselves off our backsides, bought a few games off ebay and everyone is a lot happier (after a few initial protests) and we are polishing our halos! (This is my story btw..not for a minute suggesting that you are just sitting around , just saying that we found it so easy, and he never seemed to get fed up with it, so we took it upon ourselves to do something because it really wasn't right)

Thank you so much for replying Mrsmuppethead, I think i have been lazy and a bit weak in allowing ds to spend what is obviously for him, too much computer time.
He has also been ratty and cannot get to sleep, and i have been feeling guilty that we don't do enough together. So you have convinced me that there is life beyond computer for ds. How does your ds cope now when his weekend hour comes to an end?

None in the week. I have 3 kids and it just causes too much arguing, plus the older two have lots of homework.

Too much screen time causes children to become grumpy and weird in our house.

twoplusthree

We had similar issues with DS & Computer games at home and so came up with some simple to follow rules..

Our solution was Monday a.m. - Friday PM (so school days) - no computer/ DS & tv

weekends they're allowed time on PC/ DS - but we try to keep it under 1 hour. To be fair they usually are more than happy with this. We usually tend to use DS heavily for long car journeys.

We've found this system is easy for them to follow and means all sorts of reading/ school work gets done during the week and we can have a relaxed weekend.

I limited screen time for my children (4 & 8) because they were getting hooked on it. I agree with what Mrsmuppethead says.

When their time is up if they won't get off the computer I turn the screen off and warn them that they will lose time off their next screen slot if they make a fuss. (the 4 year old still doesn't realise that the reason the screen stops working sometimes is because I have taken the power cable out of the back ).

You will probably have to deal with some strops but DS1 has started to get into reading now we limit screen time.

I set my phone alarm for him, and also point out the time on the clock when he will need to come off (not that he can tell the time, but guess it must be somehow educational to do this!). I also pop in when I know the time is running out just to prewarn..and I have something lined up to do when he's off...board game/cake making/swings/bath with millions of bubbles/running round the house pretending to be alien invaders (play that one with my DH too). He isn't always ecstatic about it all..and if his game has 2 mins left I'll wait for him to finish..but won't get into 'just one more' discussion. Getting easier and easier all the time . Well done for facing up to it though..it's a very easy habit to get into, and it is so so nice when you get a bit of time to yourself even if its to do exciting things like washing up..but we really are happier now and I feel like a brilliant mother just for playing snap!

I have some of these
sand timers

I find that if I put the 10 min timer on for the last 10 mins of the session it gives the children a visual cue that their time is going to run out.

We also restrict to weekends and an hour at a time. When we first got heavier with the time restriction ds1 (7) had massive paddies when it was time to come off . we used a kitchen timer, gave warnings , but he was still a pain. Now, we time his moaning and that comes off his next wii session- so far so good and the paddies have magically stopped!!

I love the timer idea and especially the timing the moaning idea. Thanks so much for the support. I have felt that i should do something for a while now, but been too lazy and too worried about ds's reaction, but i am definately going to be be strong!