You all sound very reasonable and calm. DS and I often end up yelling at each other. He is now yr 4 but is still arguing with his yr 2 teacher about a spelling she marked wrong, his grandma about the fact that she put mushrooms in the shepards pie at Christmas, etc. He never let's go and it is very wearing. My current strategy is to make him do his homework, but let him do it alone, if he gets it wrong, well that shows his true level of understanding to his teacher. He hates this but has hated all the other strategies i've employed over the years, so what to do to improve things?. Both his nursery and now his school describe him as exceptionally stubborn. He does not get on with his teachers, except for the yr 3 one who was brilliant. But now we are in yr 4 and I am exhausted through arguing with him, even though I try hard not to.
If he is disagreeing about an easily proved fact my method is to state the fact (aiming at a neutral tone) and explain I am 100 percent certain of it but that I will not argue and walk away. This is starting to work, the sulk that results from this strategy is reducing in length.
If he is arguing about something that is none of his business (he has strong views on disciplining his younger sister, what telly program's should be on and what I am cooking for tea) I tell him it is none of his business and if that doesn't work send him to his room, otherwise I'm unable to finish my conversation with DH / cook anything other than meatballs / watch anything but sport on the telly. This isn't working but I haven't got a new strategy yet. By the way I am fair about telly time- he does get his share, and I do cook him his favourite meal quite often!
The problem is that as a working mum there really isn't time for all the bro-ha-ha that goes with his homework. We simply don't have the hours and hours that his arguments require.
Oh dear, this thread is too close to the bone and I have typed an essay for which I apologise...