When to tell school DS1 (Yr2) is leaving to go to indie school

[iyatoda]

Need help with this especially from people who have BTDT. DS1 and DS2 have paased their 7+ and 4+ assessment to start in Sept 2012 and wonder when is the best to inform DS1's current school, also I need help with

• Who to inform. Class teacher or Head teacher?
• Do I need to write a formal letter or is face to face adequate?
• When should I tell DS1 to let his friends know. DS1 is very social and is friends with all 13 boys in his class.

Please this is my first post, and will appreciate helpful comments. I have gathered a lot of useful advice on this thread but have not come across one on this topic yet. Thanks

Tell everyone - school head, teacher and other DCs all at the same time -because IME they all talk to one another, so it's best to just decide when to let them all know at once.

Moved my DD in the middle of Y3 (from one state primary to another). You need to tell the school in writing. They don't need more than half a term's notice because they won't hold the place for more then half a term for someone new anyway - so telling them after Easter would probably be plenty time, but then if the move is certain you might as well tell them sooner.

But probably also good to talk to the class teacher too, to thank them, etc at the same time.

I did find that once DD had told a few people it very quickly got round the class and lots of parents were coming up to me asking if it was correct. Is DS impatient to tell his friends? If so, can't see any reason to keep it secret, but we only had half a term's notice and that seemed about right really for DD and her friends - time enough to get used to the impending change, but not too long to worry about it. Whilst your DS may well be excited about the new school, his friends will of course see it as a purely negative thing that he's leaving.

We moved DS for P2 (so he was 5 going on 6). We told the school quite early on that we were thinking if moving him because we were asking questions about how P2 and future years would be structured (school was incredibly over crowded and operating above class size limits because of that). The school wouldn't / couldn't answer so we accepted the place at the other school.

Confirmed it to the school towards end of the final term because we had had people make negative comments and I didn't want DD to have to hear those discussions. I found it didn't make a difference in terms of DS's transition to the new school. He knew he was moving, his school were aware we were thinking of it. They were already way over capacity so I knew they were not waiting on us leaving in order to offer the place to someone else. In fact they'd been quite honest that they were hoping a certain number would leave as it would make it easier for forming the P2 classes.

So my answer is to tell them when it works for your child.

Agree with chrysanth.

Told school teacher and Head verbally in Feb.

Told a few close friends but kept it informal at same time as DD was sort of telling her friends.

Finally confirmed in writing to school office at end of Aug via email. Was going indie BUT if anything had happened to DH or I in the meantime DD would have stayed at state. Couldn't have afforded it as a single parent.

So, I would say inform but don't give up your current school place until everything is final.

When I handed in notice at my school they told me that she wouldn't actually have her place "taken" off her until she acutally left - you might want to check if this is correct/the same in your school. If so, if anything went wrong and you wanted to keep him at the same school, then you could still do that. But the school will probably appreciate knowing for planning reasons.

have done this many times (moved quite a lot) and have always just informed the school via the teacher/head verbally. Have never put it in writing, the schools have never asked for it. They can't give your place to anyone else until you actually leave. DS2 left state for private last year (going into yr3) and there was another DC waiting for his place but even at appeal it didn't make any difference until my DS actually didn't show on Sept 1 and was on the new schools register the LA wouldn't give the new DC the place !!

Thanks everyone. I am very nervous about informing the school and his friends, I do not know why but will probably inform them after the easter holiday as they have been wonderful to my DS1.