So I need to know more about this whole primary school thing...

[lucysnowe]

Hi all

So DD is going to reception in Sept and I am feeling pretty clueless about the whole thing. I know a bit about phonics but that's it. I know it varies from school to school but I really would like to get properly genned up
on what she will be learning, how I can prepare and help her at home, etc. Hope this doesn't sound too control-freaky. Can anyone recommend any books she and/or I can read, or does have anyone have any top tips?

Also (sneaky double question) once a school has been chosen, what happens next? Do we get to fill in a massive form about DD and does a teacher always come round?

Thanks guys :)

Settling in procedure depends very much on the school.

Once the school is allocated you will be sent info about uniform, start dates etc. Some have a new parents info day, some a home visit from a teacher.

Reception is the same play based curriculum as nursery.

There was a long thread on here last year with lots of tips for getting them school ready - hope someone can link it.

Basically in a nutshell don't stress about academics.

Work on practical things like can she recognise her name on her peg, put coat on and off and zip it, dress and undress after PE (remember the clothes will be inside out in a heap) If having packed lunches - can they open packaging, carry a plate/use knife and fork if on dinners. Can they use toilet independently.

I read a few starting school books with DD before she started - she liked the topsy and tim starting school one.

Also once you know which school keep an eye out for any concerts, school fairs you could go to with your DC.

Don't leave uniform too late especially if some stuff has to be ordered from the school itself before they break up. It seems madness to buy early but it is frustrating to leave it and then you can't find the correct size.

thankyou dixie, I'd like to see that other thread!

Dressing etc we are working on, still in early stages however!

I am in Oxfordshire and we didn't even get told that we had to fill in a form to apply for school places so I'm thinking school support will be fairly minimal...

What does she do now? Hopefully she's doing some sort of pre-school/nursery. I think getting used to being in groups of children, being told what to do and doing it, knowing behaviour boundaries and respecting them -these are the most important things.

Oh yes, it helps if they are in a class of 30 that they can write their name, just so their precious drawings can then go home with them . I had to teach my son to write his surname pretty quick as his first name is rather popular and there are 3 of them. THere was a crisis in the first week when one of his paintings went home with the wrong child .

Here you go

Agree with others - the settling in thing varies a lot from school to school. I do think it's fairly standard to invite you to meetings towards the end of June though, where they tell you all they think you need to know, and usually the children stay and play a while. It is very fashionable to go and visit children in their homes at the moment as well, but not every school does it.

Oh good I'm glad there's some kind of meeting where I can tell the teacher at great length all about DD's amazing specialness :)

Hmm tgger writing names... her name is rather long. But she could write her nickname I suppose. She likes to do it at pre-school (we do do pre-school) but not so much at home.

With regards to books etc, is there a book out there entitled 'everything you need to know about your child going into reception'. or something similar ? kind of like a curriculum thing? I'm not getting obsessed honest.... :)

It's definitely a bit of a shock to the system going all day everyday so if you can do any extended pre-school days then I would go for it- not all the time but helps.

You sound like me a year ago! What DixieChick said basically.

Getting dressed and undressed. Try on pinafore dresses and make sure she can get on and off, else stick to skirts. Turning clothes right way out again to get dressed. Tights on and off. Doing coat up.

Eating with knife and fork if they will have hot meals. Opening everything in lunch box.

Recognising full name when written down (for coat peg but also name tags in uniform). Being able to write at least first name and first letter of surname.

Confidence to speak to teacher, and to ask to go to toilet. Be able to wipe properly and wash hands in toilet.

Being able to put hair clips back in - my DD is still hopeless at this.

Not essential, but preschool taught some phonics so I also supported this at home and this has given her confidence at school. The BBC Phonics DVD pack is good. We didn't do much in way of writing apart from her name, but she learned all the single phonemes and some of the double-letter ones too. Didn't push her at all, she just loves books!

Oh, and definitely buy uniform when you can. We had problems getting some bits as they were sold out, but had enough to start with. If you buy M&S you can always exchange. Only just got school shoes on time as DD has very narrow feet and shops sold out of her size quickly.

Hope to help.

Hi

Just chill out, Dear, and let DD chill too!!

I agree all of above - I assume you were 'tongue in cheek' about her specialness! All children are special to their parents, even if to no one else!

I was a Teaching Assistant (male) for twelve years, ten yrs in Infant school, two in a tough Comprehensive. Since retiring I have done voluntary help in Primary, particularly supporting reading, (and I also try to reassure nervous parents on MN!) Whatever DD does or doesn't do I can pretty well guarantee the school staff will have seen it all before!

As a child I never enjoyed school, so now I make a point of helping nervous and/or less able kids gain confidence and skills.

Re name-writing: Yes, use nickname or even initials, as long as it identifies her work.

AND MARK ALL HER CLOTHES, etc with name. Nothing bugs teachers more at the end of a hectic day, than a box of identical jumpers with NO NAMES ON!!

As you said, schools vary - in the way they teach, how they reward and discipline, run clubs, etc. And I'm sorry to say, some are not as good as they ought to be. Just as shops vary in what they sell, presentation, how they treat customers etc, - think M&S; Tesco; Lidls. Of course, each child deserves the best: and I hope DD receives it.

Just relax and enjoy it - it goes quicker than you would ever imagine. (My DS is twenty-eight now.)

Usually from around April/May, once the school places are out, there'll be a 'mums-of-new reception-starters' support thread (and if not I'll start one!), where everyone can obsess to their heart's content. See you there!

Many schools will give info/have a meeting about how they are teaching phonics (DD's had a session for parents afterschool).

Also don't stress if your DC can't do all the dressing/zipping coats etc - willingness to have a go and practice is what they do in reception.

Glad someone could link the thread - lots of great tips. My favourites were label everthing and buying keyrings to go on the identical pe bag/reading folder for easy identification.

Also if you will need childcare don't leave it too late to sort.

I never got told about the forms etc. to apply for school, this information was expected to be picked up from: information in libraries, per-schools, doctors surgeries, the local paper etc. Or the council website. Visiting schools was also something for parents to arrange, although our local paper does advertise open days, the school I sent my kids to doesn't do open days or advertise, but let's you visit whenever and is over subscribed.
However all local schools here do an induction program. This typically involves a couple of meetings with parents, about 4 brief visits with parents, with a bit of play and borrowing a book to look at and some information about starting, then in the summer there are two visits without parents, one with lunch. You also get invited to the summer fair and other social events, as well as being given information on buying uniform.
Then in September the start is gradual, at DCs school for the first few days the reception kids start a little later, and tend to only do half days at first.
DCs school also asks you what you want your child to be called. Lots of kids start dropping one of their double barrelled names at first, and with their nickname (helps when there are 3 kids with the same first name, if one uses a nickname instead).

Ferguson whatever do you mean of course my DD is the most specialist amazingness in the history of DDs

mummytime that is good to know that despite the lack of help upfront (I stil think it's very peculiar in my county you don't get told to register for schools - if you don't go to pre-school or children's centres you are pretty much buggered) there are some meetings and introductions etc.

Thank you all for the other info. So I guess most important is: lunch stuff; write or recognise name (hmmmm); dressing; confidence etc. Very helpful!

lucysnowe:

My friends and I actually found it was harder on us than our DCs. Basically this is when your little baby becomes a proper child.

I agree with many posts (especially dixiechick1975 and fairypenguin) - and strongly agree that those first months in YR are really about settling into the social situation and school environment.

You can also look on the MN Education page (just click education on the blue menu line and have a look at various topics - starting school may be useful).

In terms of what you can do:

Before starting school:

Once you know where you are going talk about that school - talk about what you liked about school.

Possibly walk past it and show your DD where they will be going

If there is a summer fair and it is open to wider community - go along - so she can see the school.

Once you get the acceptance letter (usually late March) from the school - they usually have a series of visits (some just parents, some just child) in June/ July time. This is to start that process of getting to know the school for your DD and for the teachers gives them a chance to meet your DD and become a bit more familiar with her as an individual.

First Term

Allow your DD the entire first term to settle in. It can be a real shock starting school. Sometimes for the DC and sometimes from the Mum and Dad.

If you can in that first term - try to attend meetings, information sessions, reading mornings, etc... to get a feel for what they are doing and for the school. It also shows that you care and are interested in your DDs learning (to DD and school).

It's a very useful time to build reading routines. If you haven't already established one. We started reading books after bath in nursery but carried on with school.

Our experience was that YR/ Y1 really focus on reading skills and maths took a back seat. This may not be other schools - but if you are worried about maths skills - play counting games, card games, buy workbooks for YR level and try and encourage as much counting (up/ down, by 2, etc...) as you can over those first years.

Finally bear in mind that elsewhere in the world a 4/5 year old would still be in nursery. So try to relax about 'academic' work this year. It really is about learning through play.

I have had DSs start at 2 different schools (we moved areas when DS1 was in year 2).
With school 1, largish town school, they did a home visit to find out all about the child (I think DS had his when he started at the nursery attached to the school so he didn't get another one). They wanted to know the sort of things he did (e.g. go to park, toddler groups etc) any things he had problems with etc. There was a day in the summer term when he went into reception for the day, got all excited by the 'star of the week cup' that if you were really good you got to take home on a Friday (cue lots of upset all through the winter term when he didn't win it). Parents went to a meeting the day their child started about sort of things the children would be learning and what help we as parents could give.
With school 2 which is a fairly tiny village school, they don't do any home visits. DS2 went to the nursery attached. There was a meeting in the summer term one lunchtime where they showed us the sort of things DS would be doing and explained what help we needed to give with homework. i.e. writing the phonic of the day in their writing book and helping them with their reading book.
Most important things are as have been said above are basically being independent.
Can your child use the toilet by themselves.
Can they get in and out their PE kit (and not lose their school clothes)
Can they open their lunchbox and any tubs inside
Can they recognise their name on their lunchbox incase everybody has the same one
Can they tidy up a toy when they have finished playing with it

In terms of learning phonics - Jolly phonics are good - if your child is naturally inquisitive about letters anyway. DS1 went to school able to read as he learnt his phonics when he was 2. His school noticed he could read about 6 weeks before the end of reception as he was too scared to come out from under the table.
DS2 had no interest in letters until the summer term before he started school (fortunate he is an October birthday as he would have had problems starting school a year earlier!). The nursery gave him phonic reading books for the 6 weeks before he finished their. When he started school it all clicked completely and within weeks he was being taught literacy with the year 1/2 class.

We had a "sneaky special symbol" - my eldest, EVERY thing had a star on it next to her name (schoolbag, lunchbox, clothes, pe kit everything), youngest had a smiley face.

Oh (as I'm a mid day /lunch supervisor) write their name INSIDE the lunchbox too - that way as we go up and down we can say "Johnny, do you want some help with that..." etc. makes it easier for us to learn the names, and gives them a "friendly face" at lunchtime.

We are Oxfordshire too. You can look on the Council web site for info. Also I think all schools have a web site to look at too. You should find things about uniform and school times on there.
Oxfordshire is (Ime) pretty bad at passing on info, but will vary from school to school I suppose.
Will she be moving to school with a cohort, or joining new kids she won't know? If the first - great, if the latter, then look out for activities new the school in the hope of meeting a few of the kids she will be with at school.
She'll love it - it's just like nursery really!!!

Oh - I only know of 1 tiny school round here that does home visits, so don't bank on getting one!

I second sorting out the uniform in plenty of time. In particular anything that needs ordering or some unusual colours.

My DD's infant school the girl wore yellow summer dresses - absolute nightmare to get hold of - always sold out by end of April . After the first year I knew to buy them as soon as I saw them in Tesco!

Also I can recommend the appointment system if you are going to get Clarks shoes. Saves waiting 3 hours for an assistant to help you. Also preordering some shoes in your DD's size into the store. This especially helpful if you have a child with an H fitting like I do.

Thanks guys, much appreciated. I will try and get involved as much as I can (erm, without being too helicoptery) but I appreciate it's important not to stress DD out. :)

It's fun! I love the whole school thing, and Reception is so much fun. We did get a pack with lots of paperwork from the school, including a form to fill in with details about our child. Our reception teacher actually read it all too - at our first parent evening, she was chatting about how much DS2 had come on sith certain things I had mentioned in the form.

We're in oxon and have never had any trouble with the LA. I've always found the school place allocation thing was very smooth and simple.

My son is possibly starting in september and he hasnt been to any kind of nursery or pre school so i am slightly worried(only slightly)about him adjusting to things like lining up and sitting down when told,coming in at playtime etc.He has no concept of these things!Im not keen on pre schools etc as i think kids that age should be witht heir mum as much as possible but now we have chosen the school rout(previously we were planning on home ed)I think i may send my son who is 3 next month(and will be 3 and a half in september)to the pre school attatched to the school,as i think it will possibly help for when he starts next year.My 2 year old will still be with me though.I cant wait to get started preparing it sounds like fun!