8 yr old girls and parties

[mumto2lovelygals]

My DD1 never gets invited to birthday parties. She enjoys school and seems to have a good set of friends,there are 5 she mentions in a group who she talks about. She had her birthday a couple of weeks ago and we had the 5 here for a party. They all seemed to enjoy it.

DD1 then said it was one of the other girls birthday and took her a card and small present to school. She then said that evening that the other 4 were going to her party but she wasn't invited. She was upset but no tears. There have been other instances. There was also an instance in the same group where she was invited to the party but excluded from the sleepover that the rest of the group went to
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I know noone has to invite her but I am worried she is being excluded.

Around here though parties tend to get much smaller once the children turn 8.

DD has been to parties with sleepovers after. Sometimes she is invited sometimes she isn't. Depends.

I would only be upset if it was one of 'best' friends that didn't invite her.

Thanks, yes the two instances are who she sees as her best friends. I am probably reading too much into it, just seems strange that 2 weeks after her party not to get invited to this other girls yet the others in the same group are. Hey ho, she has one of them round to play tonight and all seems fine.

Perhaps she was invited but the invite got lost?

Fraid not, she asked and was told she was not invited. The mum came and collected the other girl tonight and said she was off to party shop to get Hawaiian outfit as her DD was off to a hawaiian party on saturday. It is just not the first time and I am worried she is being excluded by these girls.

I would hate this for my dd and totally over react and demand she does nt play with these "friends" again. Seriously I am a bit black and white like that. Poor dd.

Sounds like she is on the very edge of the group. I would encorage a club outside school, Brownies or something, to give her a wider group to interact with and help with confidence, and also encorage her to widen her group at school. Maybe there are other girls who would love to play with her but she hasnt considered it as she thinks of herself as part of a set group. It might be worth a word with the teacher about it. A few carefully chosen invites to tea and she might have a new set of friends by Easter. Teach her not to think of herself as second best or lucky to be in the group but last. Good luck, its horrid for you and her.