How involved do you get with Year 6 friendships? Surely they are too old to be 'micro-managed' by mums.

[sandyballs]

My two DDs are nearly 11 and are in year 6. They have been making their own way to school for several weeks now and knock for a couple of girls that they are particularly close to, on the way.

A friend of mine, whose daughter is in the same year but not particularly friendly with my girls, has noticed them cycling by and feels hurt that they don't bother to knock for her DD.

They must pass about 10 houses containing year 6 pupils on the way to school, they couldn't possibly knock and wait for all of them!!

Surely it isn't our job as mums at this stage/age to get so involved with these things. I think it's up to the girls to chat at school and decide what they want to do and who they want to see, as long as no nastiness is involved.

Do you agree or has my friend got a point?

I agree with you.

She's old enough to say - 'hey I know those and if I catch up, i can cycle with them'. Or actually speak to them in school and arrange it.

Perhaps this girl is v shy or just has an interfering mother.

If your friends daughter wants to tag along it is up to her (the daughter) to arrange something. Leave it to them. They've got bigger fish to fry in year 6.

Thanks for replies, I'm glad you both agree that they are too old for this type of interference from mummy .

This girls isn't shy at all, she does have some friendship issues but that is due to her anger and bossiness on the whole I think.

In that case Sandyballs I would keep you head right down - quite probably the last thing your daughter and friends want is a bossy angry person accompanying them to school each day - quite enough of that at school day!

It is hard and we all want to see our child in the centre of a bubbly group of chums but I agree that by year 6 mothers need to pull back a little, unless of course something v unpleasant is going on.

Thanks Michael, she is quite hard work so I can understand their recluctance. They'll all be in secondary in Sept so hopefully expanding their friendship groups. I was just a bit surprised that her mum mentioned it as though me and my DDs were at fault for not including half of year 6 en route to school.

If she was that bothered she needs to make sure she's waiting for them and just tag on after them.

Sounds like it's the mum that's bothered not the dd.

I think the larger a group of children cycling the more dangerous they can get-trying to cycle close together to talk, or going three abreast, or pushing past another to catch up with the person at the front etc.

My dd s walk to school together and they wouldn't call at someone's house unless they asked. If nothing else calling at each house slows them down, even more so if you're cycling.