moving from private Prep to local state

[tryingtobemarypoppins2]

Any positive stories?

Had an emotional day as DS is so happy at prep nursery and we could 'just about' keep him there but we have a second DS and although I could work more hours, the financial pressure with 2 at prep school and no holidays, days out etc etc feels too much...... does that sounds shallow? We know we would be better to save for later on. DS hates change, has made so many friends, school is fab, state local is good but not as amazing :(

bump

You don't need other peoples' positive stories, you need to make your own. Plenty of children are perfectly happy at local state schools, so there's no reason why your child should be any different.

When I look back at my time at primary school, I remember a few highlights, but I remember the family holidays, bedtime stories, shared interests, days out, love and time spent with my parents and siblings much better, so if you have more time and more money for that, then that's a good thing, isn't it? Better that than remembering a school with fantastic facilities and a mum and dad too tired, time and money poor after paying the school fees to provide anything much else of note.

I feel for you!

We just moved from State to Private, however, the thinking about it was so much harder than doing it.

I am sure it will be the same the other way, I can't believe how easy our dd, who is 7 made the change. Children really are so adaptable and of course your ds will be starting a new school with all the others who are starting having come from nursery, whether private or not.

In my experience most of the children won't know each other anyway, unless the school has its own nursery, but there will still be others coming in.

The school and routines etc., will no doubt be different from what you are used to, but that doesn't mean in a bad way!

You are not shallow atall, if we had two children and not the one, private wouldn't be an option for us.

Better doing it sooner, at his juncture, than later.

Best of luck.

Does your prep offer bursaries? We have a 50% bursary for Y3 DC - fingers crossed we get the same for DC2. Then it's two for the price of one

Don't look on the negative, stress the positive about the State school to your son. Spend a long time getting him used to the idea of moving on to a new school, and he may surprise you how adaptable he is.
Good reasons to go for a State school: you can now afford extra tuition if he needs it (either to stretch or catch up), if he ever has any form of SEN they will probably be much better prepared to help him, you can afford to enrich his education, you can save to help him later/through Uni, and as a family you are not over stretching your finances.
You may find things you really really like about the local State school later.

It's only nursery. In the long run, your child won't remember very much about it at all - he's too young. Lots of children change setting between nursery and school. Rabbitstew is absolutely right.

We moved our daughter from Swanbourne House at the end of Y2 to a state school in Milton Keynes - St Thomas Aquinas. In so doing, she moved from a class of around twelve to a class of thirty plus and she absolutely loved it.
The reason we moved her was because the private school children were all pretty much from the same socio-economic level and, frankly, it was very boring. On the other hand, the state school had a a very broad mix of children, some of whose parents came from many different parts of the world. Culturally, our daughter enjoyed every minute and was very sad to leave it behind a couple of years ago.
That's our very positive story, but the thing about most children is that they are very adaptable and resilient. Good luck!

kerrygrey is the 50% bursary means tested or given for ability?

Thank you all. I just feel that I am letting him down :( If we had planned better financially, invested more wisely etc we would have been able to with out struggling. He has had a fab start there so I hope he will remember it! I guess if things dont work out at the state school we can always look again at him returning, but we need to try or we will never know.

Has anyone ever done a buy to let to fund schooling??

Where we are it seems to be the norm to do nursery at the local private schools and then move state school for reception onwards. No trauma amongst friends who have done this. Ds went the other way - from a montessori nursery to reception at a pre-prep. Half the children in the year had been at nursery together but ds soon made friends.

I had a conversation with my 9yo DD recently. She has a very good friend who goes to a rather expensive prep school. DD is at the local state primary.

DD has just (only just, mind you) become aware that there are some schools you have to pay for. She wondered why we have chosen the free one, when she can see that her friend's school has much more space, a lovely swimming pool and various rather exciting school trips that her friend has told her about.

I explained that we could possibly afford to pay for that school, but Mummy would have to work much longer hours (currently PT but don't work after school), there wouldn't be many holidays and she and her sister would have to share a room forever because we wouldn't be able to pay for the extension we are about to build.

DD is now absolutely positive that she would prefer us to use our money for those family things, rather than paying for school. (And in terms of academic stuff, she's being catered for very well!)

Tryingtobemarypoppins2 Oh FFS, you are not letting him down, the vast majority of children in England go to state schools and, yes, do have a fair amount of brain cells to go round.

If you want your child to be happy with your choices, then don't spend the next 13 years (or however long he's in the state sector) wondering out loud whether you are letting your child down not sending him to a private school. Spend your time giving him the experiences you want him to have yourself, instead of wasting your money on other people doing it all for you so that you can go out and work full time in a job you don't enjoy as much as you enjoy spending time with your children. And count yourself lucky you don't need to work full time to fund your children through state school and that you have a perfectly good state school on your doorstep.

OP I know one girl from DCs state school who went to Cambridge this year, having got 4 A* (not the only one in her year) she has also represented GB in international competitions and sung at a high level. Her one privately educated brother will not be topping that.
A friend of mine's SIL gets annoyed at the opportunities her daughter gets at State school, as she feels you should have to pay for that. Don't listen to journalists or certain London crowds. At DCs state school there are the children of Surgeons, Lawyers etc. and at least one millionaire (as well as bus drivers etc.)

Moved my DD between schools at last year when she was 7. (from state to another state school). She settled within a week and the other children were hugely welcoming and fighting to be her new friends. She's kept up with some of the old frineds, so now has twice as many friends! Agonised over the decision, leaving friends, etc (new school is nearer, but old one wasn't impossible) but haven't looked back and nor has she.

At my kids school, between 5 and ten kids a year (every year, even in the boom years) arrive from the local private schools.
Some kids move in and out depending on parents finances.

Look at the threads about results at state schools
the single strongest determining factor is the level of support from home

if you put your kids into state school and hence free up time for activities, trips, and all the good things in life, their accent may well be a bit rougher (but the jokes will be equally bad) but their long term prospects will be unchanged and your home life may improve

my kids state comp has facilities that make what I had at GDST look dire