LSA grabbed my Y4 son by the neck

[jill1971]

When I waiting with the other mums at school today, I was told that on Tuesday my son was told off by a female LSA. When he tried to explain his side of the events, the LSA grabbed him roughly by the neck and told him not to answer back. When I asked my son about it he said it was true. I phoned the school straight away to complain but was told that the Head had gone home. I am furious about it. How do I complain?

I would ask to come in and discuss the situation, and find out both sides of the story but this is not OK.

I would take things slowly and establish the full facts. I would request a meeting with the head teacher to discuss the incident and ask for the school's side of the incident. You will either get a very different story about what allegedly went on or the school will listen carefully to your concerns.
You need to check that your son has no bruising etc and if so take photos.
School staff are allowed to restrain pupils where necessary but this does not on the basis of your post seem to be a situation where this was necessary, so the LSA may be in the wrong or there may be a whole lot more to the story that you son has missed out, such as his explaining his side of the events involved some physical contact.
Either way it is quite clear that you and the school need to get to the facts behind the incident. When you think that you have the facts as the schools sees it then you can decide whether a formal complaint is necessary, which should be in writing and to the head teacher in the first instance, given the circumstances

Thank you for your post. I will speak to the Head tomorrow, but I always feel intimidated when I have spoken to him in the past. I want to make an official complaint and I want to know what to say so that I can feel confident before I go in.

if you want to be confident when you go in could you put your concerns down in an email, cc it to the governors and then ask for the meeting to address the points. Print it out and then take it with you, try your hardest to not get emotional and keep your cool in the meeting or it will not go well. I saw a LSA grab a child by the scruff of his neck last year, he was walking away from her crying and grabbing him made it worse. The other parent and I intervened and then the situation calmed down. We didn't know the child as he was 4 years older than ours so couldn't tell his mum and felt awful. The school need to take this seriously and they will if you remain calm and collected, if you go in all guns blazing they will think you are a trouble maker. I think we helped last year as we were removed from the situation as it was not one of our DCs but I don't think I could have remained so cool if it had been one of mine. Maybe take a friend with you and any photos of any bruises.