little ones so tired, help please.

[twinmummy24]

my twin DD's started in reception this september and have settled well into school, they turn 5 in a couple of weeks so are two of the oldest in their class, but both of them are seriously suffering with tiredness.

I have always had a good routine with them, up stairs at quarter past 6 into bath and asleep for 7 then sleep through until half 6 the next morning but over the last few weeks asleep time has moved forward to 6 with them needing to be woken at half 7 the next morning.

I have had to bring tea time forward to 4pm or they are to tired to eat and just cry through tea.

I had hoped a rest at half term would help but it has made no difference.
they are both ok during the school day, are progressing well but home life is really suffering, they hardly see DH during the week as they are in bed before he gets home, (he normally does the bed time routine so he gets to spend time with them), i just about manage to get them through reading books and homework before bundling them off to bed

Is anyone else having a similar problem or can anyone offer any advice on the best way to deal with it, my mum thinks i should give them an extra day off school tomorow but i am not sure??

TIA

This term is a real slog for reception children (and yr 1 I'm discovering!). Last year I did what your Mum suggests to a certain extent. What I found the best though was to not wake them, let them lie in and then take them in at lunchtime. I did that 2 or 3 times a week (with the blessing of the school). Some schools might not allow this though. I would speak with the teacher. The other thing I did was ditch homework, just did reading. They were just too tired. I also made sure weekends were relaxing, no running from pillar to post or weekends away.

Yes, forget any "homework". We get one sheet a day max, and I don't do it if DS tired. He doesn't have reading books yet... (phew..!)

Other than that yes, I would let them lie in, but I know this feels "wrong" somehow. My son is similar age, just turned 5 and Reception. He's really tired and has had 2 ear infections in a row, partly I think due to being run down-
hasn't had any for 2 years previously .

Yes, like pp we have also calmed down weekends and stuff during the week (less playdates etc). It's a bit boring- I always like to go out and do stuff but having a more chilled out weekend pays dividends. DS went to a birthday party this morning and I quite wanted to go out this pm, but we ditched that idea as he was too tired. Had quite a nice chilled out time in the house. He still moaned he was "Soooo tired" at bedtime....

After DS was ill he went to bed at 6.15 a couple of nights and also had a nap one Sunday (first in about 1.5 years....!). Roll on the holidays I say... sorry not that helpful but think a lot are in the same boat.

My dd started reception in September and she's coping at the moment, but I'd be of the let her have a day off here and there school of thought if she wasn't. Also, either ditch homework or do it in the morning.

A governor at another school told me that reception attendance doesn't count towards the overall schools stats, but I certainly know of parents who have had stern letters home about their child's 'unsatisfactory' attendance when they've had a few days off sick in the autumn term of reception.

I had a similar thing with ds and now dd so I take her out of school for the occassional afternoon. I collect her after lunch and it means that she gets a reasonable amount of time at home before collecting ds.

We may have next Friday off to go Christmas shopping.

Yes, you don't have to attend school until the term after you are 5, so even for our older children there is no legal requirement to attend.

I have been thinking that if my son is tired and not coping completely with it then perhaps it is actually over-demanding for children of this age as he is October birthday and good with other children, bright, independent etc etc. They are all individuals though and perhaps he is quite sensitive and finds the stimulation more tiring than some children. . It does seem a real change between nursery and Reception though, even with a fantastic Reception teacher and lots of child initiated play etc. Think it's the 5 days a week 8.30-3.15 thing!

My DS was much the same in yr r and I ended up spoon feeding him tea and him literally falling asleep at the table at about 4:45pm most week days. He would need to be woken around 7:15 the next morning. Like others we did very little except school that year, or in yr 1 either and it meant fewer days out even in the holidays. I found it annoying and restrictive. Fortunately things improved by yr 2 and now he is in yr 4 and we have even started making his bed time a bit later (7:30pm now) as he is more than coping with the school day plus lots of tiring sports which he loves. DD is now yr 1 but gets no where near so tired as DS did.

I didn't keep DS out of school, but looking back I wish I had. It would have been kinder to the whole family to do so.

thank you all for your replies it's reassuring to know i am not the only one in this situation
think my plan of action is going to be move homework to a weekend and only do it if they are up to it,
i have re worked my morning routine so i can let them sleep until 8 if need be to see if that makes a difference and will definately consider letting them have some time off if it all gets a bit much, its their birthday party this weekend coming so might look a bit iffy if i take them out this week

We've just had a discussion on how we're going to have to get dd ready for bed earlier as she is really stroppy, whiney, miserable and tired at the moment.
I'm not sure how it's going to go though as also have to deal with younger ds and dh doesn't get in until around 6 pm.

DS is now in yr2 but I remember in reception he would just come home and scream with tiredness every evening.

It was tough tbh but the only thing that worked was bringing everything forward ie tea,bath etc and some nights he was in bed by 6.15

It does pass though and unfortunately I have to go through it all again with DD next yr when she starts reception

I always used to get the kids to wait until DH was home at 6.30 for stories and bed, but recently I just put them to bed myself and if he's lucky he gets to say a quick good night. It's a bummer as it means less quality time with DH for them, but if it means less/no meltdown at the end of the day then it's worth the earlier bedtime.

My dd1 was quiet tierd in her first term, so she had days off for the slightest snuffle! I had a much lower threshold when I knew she was v tierd. So far dd2 doing ok. She did have melt down yesterday, but she refused to sleep and pushed her bedtime from 8 to 10 on sat pm! The schools can be sympathetic, they don't want grumpy children on their hands. I think at our school they prefer a half day approach, whereas I personnaly think a day off is more effective. If anyone wants to send some sleep this way, dd2 still wakes at 6:30, though lie in compared to her little brother who never sleeps beyond 6!

I think your mum's right. Give them a day off, but maybe tell them they've got a low temperature or something so they don't think school's optional. I used to do that with ds when he was in reception as his exhaustion started to translate into not liking school. Worked well for us/

DS1 had a couple of days off due to exhaustion in the first term of reception. They;re not going to miss that much anyway.