No talking at lunchtime - is this the norm?

[Eggs]

My children have just started in primary school in London and my 9 year old is very upset about the fact that the children have to eat their lunch in silence. If they talk they are not allowed to go out for playtime. Also the children that eat a packed lunch have to wait until all the children that have school dinners are finished. I find this all very strange and think that the children should be allowed to chat while they are having lunch, it should be a social occasion. Is this the norm?

Rules like no talking in the canteen would be after a decision by the headteacher, I think. Although individual teachers have little to do with what happens in the canteen, I can't see lunch staff making a decision like that. Is the school an academy by any chance?

May be a generation thing? DS's great aunt (almost 80) assumed that they are not allowed to talk during their lunch at school. Whereas these days it is seen as very odd.

A friend's DS is in an 'outstanding' school, very academic and regimented in Reception already where they should be playing mostly. A teacher once said to my friend: 'we are a school, not a nursery'! That school would have not been suitable for my immature, young DS. Ours is rated 'good' and very learning through play orientated (at infant level).

Horrific!! It sounds like Dd3's old school where the children were given places to sit at lunchtime, it was boy girl boy girl, they were not allowed to talk and a whistle was blown if it started to get noisy.

Her new school allows packed lunch children to sit inside or outside in social areas and the cooked lunch children find a space with their friends and are encouraged to chat while they eat.

What a difference. I agree that rules for dinner time are set by the HT.

At DC's primary they were only allowed to talk to the children sat next to them. I used to help out as a dinner lady and it could get very noisy in the dining room and I usually came away with a headache. The rule was made by the HM.

I agree that the rule would be made by the Head Teacher and he/she is the one to see.. Teachers have nothing to do with dinners-unless they have one themselves.

Firstly, thanks so much for all the feed back. I will mention it to the head teacher at parents evening. I can in one way see why the noise levels need to be kept down and that chat should be kept to a minimum, but still I feel that silence is not necessary and unhealthy in this day and age. Secondly, I really did not mean to get anyone's back up in relation to the education levels between Ireland and here. I did not say it was 'loads' better and I would certainly not mention this to the teachers. In Maths and English the levels for year 5 here, which would be year 4 at home are are lower. However in other subjects such as IT and science etc they are higher. I would not want to offend.

Not at my school - taking is encouraged!

It seems a lot of parents are turning their backs on OFSTED graded 'Outstanding' schools and going to 'Good' or 'Satisfactory' schools.

We're a 'Satisfactory' school and we've seen our numbers shoot through the roof recently. Whereas we aim for every child to reach THEIR OWN potential rather than the bog-standard levels set down by a government - who have been advised by a team of advisors who clearly have not taught in recent years or not in 'real' schools - we never seem to reach 'national' targets.

We do a lot for our children in terms of pastoral care and social skills rather than focus too much on getting them to read, write and do arithmetic aged 5 in a formal setting! (Christ, they don't do it in countries where school starts at 6/7 and they have happier kids and get 'better' results!)

Parents prefer their child's Primary education to be about enjoyment for learning in an environment where they are happy, cared for and nurtured - something our parents believe we offer. In fact, the local Junior school (graded 'Good' but recently 'Satisfactory' and 'the place to go' in the town - or was) is losing children to other schools because they focus too heavily on targets, which is making kids unhappy, stressed and turned off - as well as display severe behavioural problems which WE then have to sort out. Also, the fact they've been in the national media recently and made a laughing stock doesn't help either.

Mum2be79 - I agree. What I find strange though is that 5 years ago and again recently (article in Sunday Telegraph, I think) the government has been advised (by teaching professionals) not to teach reading and writing before the age of 6 and that the curriculum should be entirely play based until that age. They were arguing that Britain had the unhappiest children and that there was no benefit in starting so early.

But what does the government do? They allowing even the youngest (just turned 4) to start full time in September, and now they are planning to test reading levels at the end of the first year. I don't know whether they mean reception or Y1? Why? I really don't get it?

Sorry Eggs, just an aside re the comment about the irish education system being better than the UK.Just interested if you find this really to be the case now after your children have been settled.next year.

We may be moving back to the UK
I visited recently a number of schools in Uxbridge and Ealing and was very impressed both with the level of resources and the teachers.
Having talked with 2 teachers from ireland they too prefer the UK system especially in regard to maths and sciences

It made me feel slightly happier about our move especially in respect of the schools

Unfortunately my dd is not allowed to talk during lunch either. She attends a Catholic school but this particular edict is nothing to do with faith. It's because the school dining room is small, there are lots of "sittings" and the powers that be have deemed this is the best way to manage the lunch queue and ensure each child has time to eat. They do have 1hr 30 mins for lunch time though, so lots of time afterwards to socialise.

Hope your dd settles in at her new school soon Eggs. It must be a trying situation for her.

Btw we live in continental Europe where formal education doesn't start until 6 yrs (although in reality virtually every child attends pre-school from 2.5 yrs onwards). And although I agree there are huge benefits in not starting formal reading and writing until 6, schools certainly make up for it from that point onwards. Loads of hwk, pressure, tests etc etc, so don't assume it is all tea and cakes over here either!!

Not defending it, but I think the UK's emphasis on "starting them young" is more to do with UK's social disparity isn't it? That is, it is intended to help the most underprivileged/disadvantaged keep pace from a very early age.

Agree with those of you who say social skills and pastoral issues are not given enough emphasis in primary schools nowadays.