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Original poster

Girls wearing trousers at primary...

101 replies

tiredandbusy · 06/10/2011 22:07

Hi!
DD transferred schools to one that's nearer (we can walk), smaller etc this term (yr4). She's always worn mostly trousers to school as well as skirts and summer dress. She was told by the girls at her new school that trousers weren't allowed but I dismissed it as absurd.... no teacher mentioned it...

Today, I asked the head and and was told that yes indeed the governors set the uniform policy and girls are not to wear trousers. Her reasons included not finding a style that suited all girls....? (boys are clearly all of identical build), no other girls minded, and we all have rules we have to live by...

I tried to reason with her politely that my daughter was more comfortable in trousers when that was what she decided to wear, warmer, quicker to change after swimming, less scraping of knees, no knickers showing when playing and cartwheeling.... She just dismissed these like I was being overdramatic and said that the kids can't just decide for themselves what to wear - I suppose it isn't really life or death but grey trousers ARE a part of the uniform - just restricted to those children with penises - and it is this I feel is unfair. She just wants a choice.

I was invited to write to the governors to request a review of the policy - I might suggest to DD that she do this??

Am i making a mountain out of a molehill?

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piprabbit · 06/10/2011 22:36

But Hazel, tis well know that only hulking great clod-hoppers can get trousers to fit.

Original poster
tiredandbusy · 06/10/2011 22:36

I am not a skirt person and whilst DD likes a summer floaty dress on occasion, she is very much a jeans girl and definitely not a follower of fashion in any way at all. Just don't get why the boys have a trousers or shorts option but girls only have skirts or dresses - plus I don't want to keep buying tights (and trying to find them in her room!).

But - she is also new and wants to make friends so an alternative view might be to encourage her to fit in - not one that sits well with me however - but I'm trying to remember it's not my battle but hers!

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Original poster
tiredandbusy · 06/10/2011 22:39

Was a governor yrs ago at DSs school! Maybe...!

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ChippyMinton · 06/10/2011 22:45

My DC school is skirts/summer dresses for the girls. It's a non-issue. There are far more important things to worry about, like the quality of education they are receiving.

CustardCake · 06/10/2011 22:49

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netherlee · 06/10/2011 22:56

Not worth fighting tbh. Life is full of rules we don't agree with but will live abiding by.

Echo what others say, uniform is not enforcable in a state primary so what can they do if you send her in grey trousers?

Welcome to MN btw I see this is your first post.

netherlee · 06/10/2011 22:57

Just to add if you are worried about the cold - wear thick tights and a knee length skirt. Modesty - if thick tights arent enough wear cycle shorts. Movement - wear a pleated skirt instead of pencil. The private school girls survive in skirts all year round.

Original poster
tiredandbusy · 06/10/2011 22:58

usually more of a lurker! thanks!

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TheFidgetySheep · 06/10/2011 23:00

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Original poster
tiredandbusy · 06/10/2011 23:01

netherlee - that's kinda why I asked really - I'm not really that worried about the actual reasons - more the fact that a choice she had previously she now doesn't and I think it's a stupid rule!

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Beamur · 06/10/2011 23:02

I'd not be happy with that either. My DD is at a school with uniform, but they can wear skirts, trousers, pinafores or summer dresses so there is a lot of flexibility.

TheFidgetySheep · 06/10/2011 23:04

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Original poster
tiredandbusy · 06/10/2011 23:04

...and! if she had been at this school from the beginning then I probably wouldn't have said anything but now she wants to wear trousers and I can't give her a good reason why she can't but the boys can kinda pisses me off! Maybe I am just a troublemaker.

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Original poster
tiredandbusy · 06/10/2011 23:05

TFS - precisely!

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sweetkitty · 06/10/2011 23:08

My DD2 would have a fit if she was made to wear a skirt or pinafore to school, she's 5 and thinks she's a boy! She wears a good quality pair of trousers and looks very smart. Would rather see girls in trousers that mega shirt skirts!

TheFidgetySheep · 06/10/2011 23:13

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PanelMember · 06/10/2011 23:19

By all means challenge the policy on girls not wearing trousers but don't buy into the MN myth that primary schools can't enforce school uniform. They can - see all the guidance linked to on the current thread about changing a primary school uniform - but there is a fundamental question here of whether a policy that forbids trousers for girls is fair and reasonable in the 21st century.

netherlee · 06/10/2011 23:20

Whether this is genuine or not, I think there are better ways of standing up to authority than school uniforms. If a school says skirts for girls then go with it. If they say navy not grey or black, wear navy. etc.

Making boys wear shorts is worse as they can't wear tights when its cold, which are just as warm as trousers.

startail · 06/10/2011 23:32

Send her I'm trousers and let the sexist 'male' I assume head steam quietly.
Tell daughter to politely tell him to ring you if he has any problem . I leave it up to you whether you choose to leave your phone on voicemail.
Or send your DD in a skirt and tights and at the end of term send the head the bill for the expense of buying new ones every time she falls over. Somehow trousers seem to survive school life, but tights don't
At one point I banded skirts because DD seemed to wreck tights so often.

startail · 06/10/2011 23:34

Sorry female head, well that's just too silly for words. Do all the female teachers and TAs wear skirts??

zipzap · 07/10/2011 00:55

How about saying that as they are obviously concerned about finding styles that suit children, you will send your dd in a skirt once you have found a style that suits her because you haven't currently... And until somebody makes a skirt that is warmer, quicker to change into, protects knees, hides knickers etc etc then just carry on wearing trousers Grin

I'd also look at other kids in the playground and see how many are wearing uniform that differs from what they are supposed to be wearing - eg if skirts are really short or polo shirts unlogoed etc etc just so you can say well she is not the only one that doesn't conform to your uniform policy.

It would be a good opening gambit to talk to other parents - it may be that they would love to have their dd's wear trousers but because they have been there from the start haven't realised that some schools do let them or bought the uniform from the list so didn't get what wasn't on it. If you could find other parents that would support you that would be great.

Also on the news earlier this year was a boy at school was was annoyed that he wasn't allowed to wear shorts in the summer when it was hot but realised that there wasn't anything in the rules about not wearing skirts so he wore a skirt to school. Got lots of media interest bbc article about boy wearing skirt to school so if your dd is up for it maybe she could get the local press involved and see if that helps her case...

SamMiguel · 07/10/2011 01:39

Way back in the mid 80's, when I was at primary school, we had aChristmas party where we were allowed to wear own clothes but the head specified girls were not allowed to wear trousers. My friend and I (aged about 10) were up in arms and organised a petition around the playground which we then presented to the head. I think he was impressed with our stance and I got to wear my black cords and Betty Boop top after all! Grin

WinnieMac · 07/10/2011 07:46

Hazel, you're putting words into my mouth. I do think that tight polyester trews make girls more prone to thrush, and I certainly wouldn't wish that one on my DD.

I also think school trousers for girls look rubbish. But that's just my opinion.

ripstheirthroatoutliveupstairs · 07/10/2011 08:41

But of course you are dainty and fragrant Winnie.
My DD has just started at a school with a uniform policy. When we were sent the list of what she had to wear, there was no mention of trousers.
I phoned to find out (the booklet had also artfully omitted any photos of girls wearing trousers) and was told they are allowed to wear them, but it isn't encouraged.
DD has just trotted off happily in a pair of Asda trousers. She has never had thrush I am glad to say. Possibly in the summer I'd be writing a different thing.

sugartongue · 07/10/2011 09:32

It's certainly old-fashioned but I'm not convinced it's discrimatory - the boys aren't allowed to wear skirts. Frankly I think life's too short to worry about such things. That said, it's always wort inspiring a bit of activism in girls as youngsters to make sure they're not push-overs as adults, so if your daughter herself wants to challenge it, then I'd let her