Advice needed - inappropriate behaviour

[EileenE]

Hi...have had an awful day. Was called by my DD's school today to be told that she had been seen asking a boy if she could see his willy and she then showed him her private parts. This is the 4th time it has happened and I'm at my wits end. She is very sorry every time but doesn't seem to remember/learn. I am so worried, scared stiff that something else will happen and can't trust that it won't happen at various summer clubs she has been booked into. Any advice??

Is she an only child? How old is she? She might just be very curious. My DD and DS are only 18 months apart - so they have seen and still do see each naked, so it's just matter of fact to them.

Has the school given advice?
It is probably just a phase, the she will grow out of. My DS is (still) in the middle of a horrible nose picking phase - including eating it. YUCK!!

Maybe you should tell her what she wants to know, ie what boys' bits actually look like! I know my boys want to see their girl friends' bits because they just want to know what they look like and how they work. They see me naked all the time but they just want to know how little girls are. They think that girls' wee comes out of their belly button... Anyway, I did explain things to them clearly and they asked 'can we see your wee whole then mummy!' errr... out of the question!

yep, she is an only child but she has lots of cousins male & female and spends lots of time with them. She has baths etc with them, sees me and DH in all our glory and we have had lots of chats about what is appropriate both gently and firmly. She knows what girls and boys bits look like. I feel so awful because it is the 4th time it has happened at school.

yes sorry...school have talked to her and the other children involved and discussed apprpriate behaviour and, whilst they nod and agree and apologise...it happens again and again. There is only so much talking you can do! The teacher sounded as if I was weird!

My guess would be that she might be copying some other child who has asked to see her bits - I think this is "contagious" behaviour. You could ask your DD why she is asking other children - and gently probe where she got the idea from.