I notice a similar thread on here already but did not want to hijack so.... DS is 7. He is in the top stream in all his subjects so not struggling academically. He finds it easy to make friends with both boys and girls. He is popular. However in his year group there is a core of about four or five individual boys, who are generally quite mean and nasty and aggressive sometimes, and I know this is not purely directed at DS. Their behaviour ranges from being generally rude and bad mannered, to name calling, shoving and fighting. None of these boys are friends with each other, which I think would be easier for DS to avoid them, they all have links with all the other children that DS might want to play with so it is hard for DS to form friendships with other groups of boys he might like to play with.
Other children have occassional problems with two of these boys in particular and some parents have complained. One of the boys thought it would be a nice idea to bring a pen knife into school and threaten to stab people! He does not appear to have been punished for this - all the children missed golden time that day, and the parents may or may not have been told. This boy used to be DS "friend" until recently (until I found out that DS was only friends with him because he was too scared not to be, and that the boy was controlling DS - who is normally quite independent) and we have recently made a complaint to the school about his behaviour towards DS, and his parents were spoken to also. In Reception and Yr1 one of the other boys was horrible to DS for a long time and for no apparent reason and this led to meetings between us and the Headteacher both of those years. Just recently when DS asked to play a game he was told by this boy "this game is about white dogs so only white people can play". We reported this and the boy was made to apologise to DS. He told DS in the playground that he couldn't play a game that he and other children were playing because he has been told to stay away from DS (and I have told DS to stay away from him). My view on this is why should DS be the one to go away when he has not done anything wrong? He also told DS "I am going to have to move schools because of you". When actually DS has done nothing to this boy at all - it is he that always seeks DS out all the time! SO how is that DS fault? TBH I would be glad if he left the school - he is a nasty boy who is horrible to a lot of other people, one parent is taking her son out because of him.
Anyway, the other thing is that DS is not being stretched enough academically - he finishes his work then has to help the other children, he says he is bored. I got him into Year 3 chess club, but that is always cancelled. His Year 1 teacher said he was set for the G&T register, but nothing more has been mentioned. His Reception teacher was a glamour puss who pranced around in stilittoes, shouted at the children and was dismissive and patronising to the parents. His current teacher is aloof and distant - she does not engage with the parents, makes no eye contact and is unapproachable. His current school does not seem to be a happy place, the don't celebrate anything and there does not seem to be any team spirit from either the parents, teachers or students. The more I talk to people the more problems I hear about. I am at a loss as to what to do. The school went from "outstanding" Ofsted prior to DS entry to "satisfactory" . The school round the corner is a regular school - "satisfactory" - but seems a more fun place, with a more caring attitude to primary school life. They appear to do more things with the children and there is more of a team spirit, they have in house school dinners! They have a Year 2 place available and we have a meeting on Monday with the Head Teacher. We also have a meeting on Monday with Deputy head of his current school. So should we make a fresh start and go there - or tough it out at this school. I can't honestly see things improving unless the horrible children leave and the "pool" of children with which DS can make friends with is limited. But whats the guarantee that things will be better at this school?
Sorry this is long. I am at the end of my tether. I cancelled all my clients today so that I could think this thing through.