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Original poster

Are children growing up too quickly?

13 replies

ldavs · 28/04/2011 12:06

Do you think childhood is different today than it was in the past?

In your opinion do children have a long enough childhood?

What is the quality of childhood today?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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mrz · 28/04/2011 13:01

Yes

No

Controlled

BoysAreLikeDogs · 28/04/2011 13:17

why are you asking?

are you doing some research?

PoppetUK · 28/04/2011 14:06

Agree with mrz.

Having lived in WA for 3.5 years I'd say I agree with the "controlled" answer from mrz.

My answers would be.

yes it's different

no - you would easily see children in Western Australia playing together on rip sticks, scooters, bikes at the beach no matter what age. 14 year olds playing with much younger children and that's ok. Here that would be something see as weird by some! I would also point out though that WA children do not have the same competition for jobs, houses etc that our children face here so can afford to take longer to develop and of course parents don't have the same anxieties.

The quality of childhood still depends on what you do as a parent. I am thankful that I got to experience Western Australia (very different to Eastern States) so rather than just following the cultural norm of today I can try to make different choices. I think I am a controlling person but am still struck how controlled it has become here, rules, rules and more rules. People are very uptight (and I thought I was really uptight!) I believe I will feel more balanced in a few months as the move / experience is still being digested and processed (along with experience many UK firsts with my now school age children)

ragged · 28/04/2011 14:23

Do you think childhood is different today than it was in the past?
Yes, many have far less freedom to make mistakes, less responsibility but more pressure. Ditto for their parents, I suspect.

In your opinion do children have a long enough childhood?
Usually.

What is the quality of childhood today?
Some better, some worse than my own.

cory · 28/04/2011 19:38

Yes, dd is taller than me, hadn't ought to be allowed Hmm

Saracen · 29/04/2011 00:43

I agree with previous posters, but I don't think I'd call this "growing up too quickly". Children simultaneously have more pressure on them, and less true responsibility. In some ways they are trying to look grown-up precisely because they aren't being given the opportunity to behave as adults when they feel ready. They are excluded from adult society.

Strangers now show concern for a young child out running errands on her own. Parents are criticised for leaving an eight year old home alone, or hiring a twelve year old babysitter. Many businesses, leisure facilities and public buildings ban unaccompanied children. Young people will soon be required to continue in education beyond 16 even if they feel capable of turning their full attention to working.

So I would say, children no longer have the opportunity to develop at their natural rate, by moving from childhood towards adulthood as they feel ready.

Original poster
ldavs · 01/05/2011 17:20

Thanks for your comments. I'm at uni training to be a Primary teacher and your comments are great inspiration for a presentation I am doing this week.

I agree with Saracen, childhood is an adult construct and there never used to be a divide due to age, children contributed to income of the household and shared the burdens of their parents. I do feel children should not bear these burdens until they are ready but often adults underestimate what children can handle. Take for example the question of where babies come from. Every parent hates that question but they wouldn't ask if they weren't ready to know. I'm not saying explicitly explain it entirely but give them information in small amounts, if it's not enough they will ask more questions. If they accept what you've told them they'll be satisfied until they're are ready to know more.

I am interested in the general concerns of parents today and would like to hear some of your concerns for your own children? These could relate to any aspect of life but this would be incredibly helpful to support some of the ideas I am presenting. Thanks again in advance!

OP posts:
Jezabelle · 02/05/2011 15:30

Take for example the question of where babies come from. Every parent hates that question. . .

Careful not to make sweeping statements. I did not hate that question. I completely agree with your thoughts that they would not ask if they were not ready for the answer, (in age appropriate language). This is also the philosophy my own mum went by. Although I was surprised to have so many of these questions at the age of 3!

As a mum of 2 DDs, one of my concerns is the world's obsession with womens' body image. I would never discuss my own body, (ie - would like to lose a little weight, need to tone up tummy before holiday etc) in front of my DDs, but plenty of women I know constantly talk about their own "big bums" or even their child's "chubby legs" in front of their and my DCs.

Not sure it this is at all relevent to your studies!

Good luck.

Saracen · 03/05/2011 00:12

Far and away my biggest concern is the indication that in Western societies, girls' self-esteem plummets during adolescence. This is related in part to the body image issue which Jezabelle mentions.

Bonsoir · 03/05/2011 00:18

Actually, I tend to think that childhood goes on for far too long these days. The teens I know are a lot less mature than I and my peers were at the same age, in part because they have been pampered by their parents who have far more money than our parents' generation did. Parents don't seem to want their children to grow up and learn the skills that will make them into independent, thinking people.

The other really hindrance to children is the plethora of rules and regulations to safeguard them - which actually just prevent them from learning how to do anything useful.

lljkk · 04/05/2011 10:21

well said, Bonsoir.

Bonsoir · 04/05/2011 20:33

DD had a friend (6.5) for a playdate today. I was supposed to pick the friend up at 12pm straight from her ballet class and went to get her as she emerged from the ballet studio. But her nanny was there, having waited right through the lesson, because the little girl couldn't manage to change herself Shock

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