Siblings in different primaries - any experiences?

[PrettyCandles]

Our youngest did not get a place at the primary dcs1&2 attend. He's been assigned a place at a school in exactly the opposite direction from them.

Anyone have experience of this?

Logistically, I think we can work it, though it would mean that the older two have to walk to and from school without me. I don't mind their independence, but it cuts me off from the regular contact with other mums and the casual, unscheduled, contact with their teachers - both of which I really value.

Not only do we prefer the first school, but I feel a strong sense of loyalty to it. I have always been involved in it, helping in the school and at events. I don't know if I will be able to split myself between the schools, or muster the same kind of loyalty and personal investment, or develop such good relationships with the teachers.

Keep her name on the waiting list for the school you want. She'll have sibling priority so should be near the top of the list and may get a place really soon.

In the mean time you'll just have to do as you've said - get the other 2 to walk to school independently.

It is hard with kids in 2 schools. But it doesn't sound like you have any choice in the matter - so just make it work until she get's the place you want.

We have separate (and unrelated) infants and juniors here so having 2 children in 2 schools is very normal. The schools are a mile apart so taking/picking up both children from both schools every day is unfeasible (though just about possible).

Most parents do some sort of sharing of the school run so they get to both schools fairly equally - is this something you could consider? Also it is worth getting involved with PTA/volunteering for the extra contact - though I agree hard work (and diluted) to do this at 2 schools.

Yes me, I have DD in Year 1 at one school, and DS in Year 2 at another school. DD is on waiting list to join her brother and has been for 18 months.

Pick offs and drop offs are doable for me, but have used friends to help share school runs more. I do find it hard to always get fully involved at either school though, especially if things like fairs are on the same day! Also difficult as DD settled now and likes her friends so isn't as keen on moving!

I'd say it's doable but not preferable, and yes make sure he is on the waiting list for the school you want and hopefully a place will come up soon.

If you think there is a good chance of your youngest getting a place later on at your preferred school, you could keep him out of school while waiting. That might be simpler. If he's at preschool and happy there, he should be able to continue there until he reaches compulsory education age in the term after his fifth birthday. After that you could decide whether to send him to school or home educate.

Did it for the autumn term a couple of years ago until we eventually managed to get our youngest into the local primary (two appeals and two references to the Local Government Ombudsman). The schools were about 2 miles apart so I dropped our oldest off early at the local school then took our youngest to the other school. In the afternoon my wife picked up our oldest while I took half an hour off work to pick up our youngest. If I hadn't been able to do that we would have used the after school club at our local school.

We didn't really invest much in my youngest's school as we always wanted to get him in to the local school and knew that we should succeed because the rules were in our favour, although it took a lot longer to get there than we were expecting. If we had failed we might have invested more in our youngest's school but we would still have been looking to move him to the local school if a place came up. We still went to parents' evenings, the nativity play and so on but if there was a clash our loyalty was definitely to the local school.

We considered keeping ds at nursery, but there are three problems with that: firstly, he is autumn-born, so, come September, could be a year older than the rest of the children at nursery. Potentially not a good situation - boredom. Secondly, come January he might still not have a place at our prefered school, and he would have a mid-year transfer into the other school, after everyone else has settled down. Thirdly, if a place then came up at our preferred school, ds would have been subjected to two mid-year transfers.

Ds and our other dc all think he is going to school A, despite our best efforts never to say that he would go there. I really don't know how to prepare him. We haven't told any of them about the situation. We will have to tell them before the summer holidays, because the new starters have several half-day visits the term before they start at that school, to get to know teachers etc.

How can I tell him on the one hand what alovely school he's going to attend, and big it up for him, but on the other hand we'll pull him out aASAP - talk about mixed messages!

He's only 4. Don't tell him anything yet, it's 5 months away and that's an age for littlies.

We were in the same position last year with DS2. I was really upset and eventually went to appeal, which I lost.
The day after I recieved my letter saying I'd lost the appeal someone from admissions rang me to say she'd been looking at the lists and someone from the school wanted had appealed for a place at the school I'd been offered so she'd do a swap. No probs!
I'd been told that would never happen by someone else in the same department!

Also, when I was panicking, the administrator at the school DS1 was at told me that the children who turn up in September are never the same as those on the original list, and some always drop out (due to transfers, house moves, home edding, etc).