TA told ds he had smelly breath

[thesmartestgiantintown]

ds in reception came home this afternoon and told me that his teaching assistant told him he had smelly breath and to go have a drink. how would you react? as i am pretty annoyed about it.
he is a sensitive boy and would take something like this to heart. if other kids had heard then it doesn't take long for them to start saying 'x has smelly breath etc'.
i unnderstand that he must have just had a dry mouth as i clean his teeth morning and night so is'nt that. i'm sure there are better ways of saying this to a 4 yr old though.
thanx

pixie - he is a pretty bright kid i'll have a chat in the morning and find out how it was worded etc.

no i understand that but why not just a 'why don't you go get a cup of water' comment to sort it. why the remark.

IF this 4 year old really was savvy enough to recognise the 'social disgrace' of having bad breath, he'd be smart enough to wonder why the TA was insisting he had a drink. He'd want to know why? And if an answer that didn't alert him to the fact it was to try and 'cure' an emerging social problem, he'd never learn the connection between having a drink and avoiding bad breath.

We really are all being rather precious about it.

but i feel like he was bothered as he mentioned it to me. for him to come home and say 'mrs x told me i had smelly breath' must have hit a nerve.

I think I would want to know more....simply because an insenitive TA is crap at this age!

'Get a drink. Your breath stinks'

'Sweetheart, I think you might need a drink. Your breath doesn't smell very nice at the moment. A drink will help sort it out'

Any TA worth their salt would say the latter

i am being rather precious yes erebus but if you don't stand up for your kids then who will?
surely if you don't agree with something then whats the problem with questioning it?
cyb - i hope it was the 2nd. i haven't had a problem with her before, she seems a very nice lady.

i understand that pixie.

Agree with pixie.

Is there really such distrust of every little thing that staff in a school might say to a child?

If a child of mine were upset by this, I would not be bringing it up with the school. I would be sorting it out with my child so they would cope better the next time they feel a little hurt by a comment that was a bit personal.

I think you are totally over reacting.

yes pointy unfortunately there is distrust of what some staff say to children or more usually HOW they have said it

A respected and experienced nursery teacher at my school was hauled over the coals because a parent felt picked on and embarressed when the teacher asked in mixed company if she would mind staying behind for a moment after a session. That was it.

That's ridiculous. I can't understand why the employer would haul a good member of staff over the coals anyway.

Because parents are seen as 'clients'

But that shouldn't mean you risk losing good staff by punishing them harshly for such a very minor difference of opinion.

Hmm Iknow. Sometimes things have to be 'seen to be dealt with' rather than say 'Actually Mrs XX you are talking tommyrot'

How would you feel if a member of staff pointed out to your child they had a runny nose and asked them to get a tissue and wipe it? Or that they still had some of their dinner round their mouth and sent them to wash it off? Would you be complaining that the TA was rude then? Or would you rather your child sat with a snotty nose or marmite smeared face all day?
Isn't it better that the TA dealt with it then and there rather than let a friend notice something later on when playing or working with your DS? That is more likely to start peer comments or name calling.

This is useful - DD says her 'friends' have been saying she has smelly breath, which she doesn't. Or so I have been saying. This has made me think that maybe she does at school because she isn't drinking enough water. Am going to ask her if they are still saying it and explain this tomorrow morning! Would actually be glad if a TA told her (discreetly).

OP, I wouldn't take this up with the teacher. I would tell your DS that breath can smell when you are thirsty - which is an interesting fact - and that he needs to make sure he is drinking more water in school.

As a teacher it drives me up the walls the amount of time I have to spend with parents who moan and complain about just about anything we say to a child. I just wish parents would trust that we are in this job because we like children and we like to see them do well. We aren't out to get your children, embarass them or make fun of them. It's getting to the point where you don't dare say anything that isnt strictly educational =(

I know there are some bad eggs in the profession, just as in any other job. But really, pointing out smelly breath and saying have some water. It's not an infringement of human rights or putting him down.

i never knew a drink could cure bad breath

Indeed, sassy, hence my remark about the OP being rather precious!

Actually it's very common for kids to get bad breath with sore throat - mouth dries up, not enough saliva to wash away bacteria = bad breath. Water should help a bit.