I am stuck between two school options.
My dd is currently in a small Kindergarten class where she is a minority. I had hoped that she would not suffer because of this but it turns out that she is. At the beginning of the school year a Mum invited everyone over to her home and pointed and unashamedly made it clear that we were not welcome. Other Mums were embarrassed by this gesture. Also, a girl who my daughter is friendly with and who is kind and sweet with my DD insisting on holding hands when they leave the school gates explained to me today that she is not allowed to come play with my dd at our house. Her Mum will not allow her. Generaly the rest of the Mums are a tight knit crowd who smile and make occassionaly small talk but it stops there. Invites are ignored and not forthcomming. I have checked with the teachers about my dd's behaviour and they have said that she is well behaved and is liked by most of the class. I have seen the affection some of the girls have for my DD.
A few Mum's who I have been friendly with and arranged play dates with are switching schools. So my DD faces the prospect of continuing social isolation with regards play dates and after school events. I do notice that generaly Mum's of 4 year olds have a direct influence on who their children befriend. Playdates often lead to firm friendships in school.
Do you think this is reason enough to switch her school? Her current school is well run with high standards and good teachers.
Naturaly her young age makes switching schools easier. However, with my recent last minute enquiries the only school that has a place for her is struggling and less established. She will not be a minority there. The main concern is that it will be a mainly boys class with perhaps 3 girls. So that in itself will limit her friend pool. From my own observations at age 4 boys tend to play with boys and girls seek out the girls.
Race and religion does not play a part in who I befriend. However, not all people see things that way and my DD's self esteem seems to be at stake here. I am British so this is an unusual situation I find myself in.
This is a sensitive topic so please respond sensitively. Thanks