Parents of children who went to prep school aged 3/4-7yrs

[sleepwhenidie]

Please can you tell me your reasons for choosing to send your DC's to private school from age 3/4? Did you feel there was no real choice between that and a poor state primary? If there had been a good state primary place available would you have taken it? Do you think it is/was worth paying the fees for that age children? If so, why? Any disadvantages, other than cost, eg too much homework/pressure or very narrow social/ethnic group?

Any particular reason why you're asking?

I had a very good village school that DD had a place for. Unfortunately it closed at 3.10 with no after school care, so it was pretty useless for me as a WM at the time.

I was happy to pay the fees, margionally more than nursery, class sizes are excellent, fantastic all round care

narrow social/ethnic group ?? not that I have noticed... there are all sorts there she has a wider exposure to these things than I do !!!

DS started at our local prep at age 3 because the fees where pretty much the same as those of the other nurseries. The prep school had much better resources than any of the nurseries we visited.

The only downside was that the nursery at the prep school would shut during the school holidays (playscheme available at a separate price) unlike the other nurseries who would open pretty much all year. This wasn't an issue for me as I work term time anyway.

OH forgot to add that we felt our son was very happy there such that he continued through to reception. He is in Y2 now.

Our prep school has a very wide 'ethnic group', much wider than the local state school actually.

The 'social' mix is also just as wide.

We'd have been happy for ds to attend local state primary. But there are no secondary schools we rated near us, so we wanted to get him into a private school by 11. It is easier to get them in at 7 than at 11 or 13. We wanted a pre-prep that would prepare him for the assessments ( entrance tests) , without having to burden him with the extra home tuition he'd have needed if he'd being trying to get in from state primary. Disadvatages? Oh my, yes: too much homework, too competetive which can lead to poor self esteem; work often simply too advanced for their age; narrow social mix -- few kids of ethnic background and (obviously) no poor ones. But unless you have a little genius who will stroll into a sought-after private school with no effot or preparation, what are you going to do? It's imperfect, but I'm glad we did it now.

both mine went to preprep. absolutely lovely school, lots of ethnic diversity not so much social for obvious reasons.

Small class sizes, lots of school trips, lovely food at lunchtime, great equipment for arts, sport, cooking, music and drama and loads of great staff. Good before and after school clubs. If you can afford it I can't see any drawbacks at all.

why do you want to know?

Local state primary isn't just poor educationally, it also has a serious and not managed bullying problem so absolutely no way would DD go there.

It was a choice between private and moving. The costs of private school for primary = nearly the stamp duty we would have to pay to get a house the same size in a catchment for a good primary without making DH's commute much more difficult (houses starting at 500k and not in London).

The private school feeds into an excellent secondary, there is a much wider ethnic mix and it is an easy cycle journey from home and then for me to get into work.

Thanks for replies. We have a good state primary (infants only) virtually on doorstep, very good lovely girls prep even closer. Trying to decide which to go for.

Expense notwithstanding, the easiest choice would be the prep as there would be no move to a new school at 8, no concerns about getting her into a prep at that point and it is a great school. We would definitely go for a private school at 8 because local state secondaries are poor, however I wonder whether academically there is such a huge difference between state/private academically at that stage and whether it is worth the cost, not just financial but in terms of time for kids to be kids rather than do homework and get academic pressure IYSWIM. Also instinctively I would prefer DD to be with more of a mixed group in terms of sex, background and financial position-which I realise is a bit hypocritical when we do intend to go private at some point, but as another poster said, no situation is perfect and we all want the best for our DC's......

We sent our DS to a private school from reception to part-way through year two. We believed that the small classes (9-10 children) would suit him as he seemed exceptionally bright. He taught himself to read aged three and had a real aptitude for maths.

We were thoroughly disappointed. No attempt was made to stretch him. They appeared to be waiting for the other children to catch up. The other children came from backgrounds where there was plenty of money but they weren't particularly bright. He was becoming bored and disruptive. We agonised over the decision to remove him and send him to a local state school but ultimately it was the only reasonable course of action.

He was actually educated at the state school and is now very happily at one of the most selective grammar schools in the country.

Moral of the story? Just make sure you know what it is that your money is actually buying. If you just want pretty manners and an unusual uniform then most private schools will fit the bill. If you want something else, be careful about which school you choose. We chose our DS's particular school on the basis of a friend's recommendation as we did not know the area. It was a mistake. Research all possible schools very carefully!

Our DD went to our local prep aged 3 and a half and is now in year 2. We chose it because it was much smaller than the local state school which suited her as she was very shy indeed.

It has been fabulous and as far as I ccan see their are some academic advantages...she's not particularly academic but they push her and nurture her.

She also has the opporunity to take part in extra crricular activities which are not offered in our state school. She speaks at a local drama festival and does ballet straight after school one day a week...no riving her to other venues. Drama club is during lunch hour one day.

We love it and so does she.

To be clear...academics were never a part of our choice. We figure that an academic chld will thrive in any decent setting with parental support. Our main concerns were that DD felt safe and the local school was/is masssive and has a very transient population...we wanted a secure and friendly environment.

Wimple is your dd's school girls only? I was reading a thread recently that seemed to paint quite a negative picture of single sex primary schools...

Also do you ever worry that there is too much academic pressure, given that you say she isn't particularly academic? How much homework does she have?

My experience of single sex primaries for girls is excellent. My DD's school is marvellous!

Mine have been in the private system from the start, and it has been fantastic. I can't say what the state alternative would have been like, though, as we didn't look at it.

No sleep...it is mixed and non selective. I wanted DD to bewith boys and also with a nice wide range of personalities and abilities.

When I talk to a friend who teaches at a local selective prep I know I made the right choice.

I did worry about the academic pressure at first...they get a LOT of homework from year 1 onwards...and they work hard too. But I see how she manages...just fine..she tends to lag slightly for a term then whizz ahead ..she loves it...is happy...so I don't think the academic thing is a bother.

In fact I know its good. I think they're capable of a lot more than we at first suspect when it comes to application.

She is very tired though...at the end of the week...you can see she's given a lot.

But in my opinion it's good...she's being stretched in all directions and having a lot of fun too. The have some wonderful activities and people coming in to talk to them and work with them.

dire local primary (which is now being shut down by 2013) :)
DD loves her school and i dont regret doing it even though its dreadfully expensive and she'll probably end up being the pitied poor kid

My DD is 8y and has been at her prep school since reception. so age 4. There was no preschool when she started although there is now.

We have a good state school locally and got a place there, but had already decided to send DD to the school she is at.

We visited several schools in the area in both sectors and chose the school that we felt best suited our DD and also our circumstances.

Is it worth the money? Yes, imo. DD adores er school, loves to go to school, has great fun, gets lots of attention, is developing so well both academically and emotionally. Nothing to dislike there.

Any problems? No. Yes, she gets homework but not a huge amount to be honest. Some of her friends in state schools get a fair bit more than her. Ethinic group is pretty wide, more so than the local state option would have been. She also mixes with children from different ethnic and social groups in her extra curricular activies outside of school.

DD's school is girls only (although there are boys in the preschool; they generally go onto the local boy's school.) DD's school has a number of events and activities with the local boys school throughout the year. Also DD socialises with boys at home (friends on our street who she plays with), with children of our friends and at her after school activiies.

Ds is at single sex pre-prep. Been there from reception and now in yr 2. My experience is a bit up and down (we had a difficult yr 1). Main reason ds is there is I work full time, am a single (unsupported) parent and it was the only way I could do my job and manage childcare. School offers excellent wraparound care and holiday club. Before that he was with a CM who was lovely but understandably inflexible. If ds wants to do an after school club he can and I don't have to worry about agreeing it with the CM in advance.

Cost is less than the CM charged.

Good point by Hulababy. The ethnic mix is far broader than at our local primaries. The social mix is also far broader than at two of our local primaries (one is more even). Mainly because those two primaries are in very wealthy areas (think £650,000 for a semi!).

Interesting stuff, thank you