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Primary education

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my ds hates bullying - I need to help him

4 replies

cinnamonswirls · 28/01/2011 18:08

but am not sure what to do

It isn't ds being bullied. He is getting more and more frustrated and upset as two kids in his class one girl and one boy are getting teased called names and excluded.

Today he was very worried and wanted me to call the girls mum after school as she was very upset at lunchtime after something happened with some of the boys. I don't have their number but will pop into her work tomorrow

He says he does what he can, he refuses to get involved, he stands up for them when he can, he makes sure that teachers/"lunch misses" know if they are upset, he partners the boy in pe when necessary and partners the girl in class. But he says that he can't do much more without being very picked on himself.

He finds the feeling in the class all wrong and wants it fixed but doesn't think he can on his own as he has been trying and it isn't working - he isn't really friends with the boy or the girl he just thinks what is happening is wrong. (The boy and he are friendly to a point but the boy finds my ds a bit annoying) He says he cannot see what the girl does to be treated so badly. My ds gets on with all the class but isn't a "leader" in class where there are many very dominant personalities.

I have been aware for a while there is an issue. Am just not sure to approach the teacher, the head or to use the gossip network to pass the word back that there is an issue.

I really want to keep my DS out of it may be selfish but.... - I also think it needs to be fixed now before they go to secondary school (Yr6 now) am just not sure of the best way to approach the school without it seeming like a complaint or my ds being over dramatic or getting involved in something that doesn't concern him

What would you do?

OP posts:
IngridBergmann · 28/01/2011 18:12

I would say something.

Can you have a quiet word with a family liaison person, maybe, who should be aware of any bullying issues going on already - maybe she can reassure you - don't just leave it though. You might be the only grown up who is aware of it.

Don't feel silly. Just say it is worrying your son and you are concerned and want to make sure they know about it.

IngridBergmann · 28/01/2011 18:13

Or a class teacher or friendly TA if you can approach them.

It doesn't have to be official and scary.

CockneySparra · 28/01/2011 18:15

I think you should go and say soemthing to the teacher, and ask to speak to the Head if it isn't rsolved. The bullying is obviously bad enough that your DS is affected by it - so imagine how the children being bullied must feel? Sad

I remember being in this situation in junior school. I was a very sensitive child and hated seeing one child being singled out or picked on. I used to get anxiety stomach aches about it Sad. You should definitely say something. Well done to your DS for speaking up, too.

cinnamonswirls · 28/01/2011 18:26

I sound like a coward don't i?

One of the problems is that it is very much an Outstanding school! pretty much perfect in every way with lots of pmpinew children and nothing like that can happen

I think i'll use triple check concerns this weekend ...then go in to see teacher next week

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