Calling all Teachers - what is your idea of a perfect parent?

[thebelletolls]

I've been stuck at home for nearly 8 days with a sick ds and dh going mildly insane and would love some lighthearted feedback from the other side of the fence. Apart from all the dcs, it must be fascinating to see so many different types of parent passing through your doors every day/year. What is your idea of a perfect parent from a teacher's perspective?

Probably the same as the perfect teacher from my parent perspective

Friendly, approachable, supportive, with the child's interests at heart.

I would hazard a guess at

one who drops off child from a slight distance and picks up from a slight distance

one who asks for an appointment when they want to discuss something rather than come up and grab the teacher when s/he has all children to deal with

one who volunteers to help

one who gives alcohol at christmas

How about this:

Is pleasant and friendly, says hello and attempts to build a good relationship with me (the teacher).

Asks questions if they are worried or confused - doesn't leap to conclusions or sit on a worry for months.

Hears their child read, at least occasionally.

Speaks kindly to their child, comes to plays, parents evening etc.

Encourages and looks out for their child, but also has the insight to see that other children need a chance too (re parts in plays etc)

Volunteers to help, and is not too fussy about the job given, eg would be happy to wash up paint pots or take a display off the wall.

After volunteering, does not gossip to other parents about what they have seen / heard in the classroom. Respects confidences.

Does not think their child is an angel / blameless in every situation, but will back school up in disciplinary situations. Realises that teachers have no interest in 'picking on' your child

Says thank you to the teacher for things 'above and beyond' - if you want to be loved by your child's teacher this is the easiest one by far!

And yes, maybe gives alcohol at Christmas!

Ooh sounds like I'm the perfect parent.

Its been a big learning curve though to make sure I dont hassle the teachers and expect instant answers. I know in Reception/Year 1 I was probably a pain (hindsight is a wonderful thing.)

I now know what goes on inside the school and this has made me realise how much the teachers do and how parents behave.

If you work and are therefore unable to volunteer - do you get marked down?

Other than that I'm a perfect parent - but all of the DCs have had/got very good teachers, so it's very easy to be a good parent (oh, apart from one numpty 7 years ago, but we don't talk about her)

My friend is a teacher at one of the local primaries - she never names names, but some of the stories about the behaviour of some parents (in a 'nice' middle class, high achieving primary) are

Hears child read every night.
Trusts me that I have a handle on reading levels, etc
Asks whether it's convenient to see me - doesn't 'catch' me in the morning (always the same attention seekers...)
Aceepts that I am human and make the odd mistake.
Comes to me when they have a solvable problem, rather than bypass to the head.
Have a realistic view of their child, whilst
having as high expectations as me (i.e. it is not good enough to send me scribbled Christmas cards)
Don't sit there and tell me their child is a 'genius' (yes, I had that last parents' evening)
Teaches their child respect for belongings and other people, plus good manners
Does not believe their child instead of me.
Teaches the child basic life skills.

Is that enough?

Ha ha exactly what stoatsrevenge said

fascinated to read this... i just tell my dd's teacher that we LOVE her when i happen to bump into her - is this too much?

Supports the child and supports the teacher where possible. Don't care about the alcohol. Course you don't get marked down for not volunteering! Teachers can't volunteer at their child's school either..you are being a good role model of a working mum to your child.

Someone who doesn't email a week before reports are due to go home saying 'We were unable to attend the parents' meeting; please could you update us on X's progress.'

NO! Wait ONE week for the report!

Probably a bit of a bringdown, however: One that loves their child and does their best for them. That makes the child feel loved and wanted at home. That keeps them clean and looks after them, lets them be a child and not forced into a carer role before their time. Values the things they take home (pictures, books, reports even) and doesn't just throw them away without looking at them. As long as the child feels loved and secure, that's enough for me. :)

Thanks to you all for these ideas. Maybe I'm not doing too badly. Haven't sent ds up a chimney, or left him in the supermarket. I listen to him read, wash him daily even though he says he had a bath the previous week, feed him well, pin up and admire his a/w and have regular cuddles. I volunteer at school and attend plays, concerts and parent evenings, illness notwithstanding.

However, I have been guilty of 'having a quick word' in the morning eg. "he didn't sleep well last night so may be tired ..." etc. I'll try not to in future, though his teacher is always so welcoming, interested and seems pleased to see us. Mostly, I'll make an appointment though. I think she's lovely and trust her and the TAs to make appropriate decisions about my ds when he's in their care. While he's been ill, he's had 3 separate emails from her asking after him and sending love from his class. Good reading practise too!

Can I add:

makes sure their child gets to school on time and has everything he/she needs, and also arrives early or on time to collect their child from school.

It is too cold to be standing in the playground for ten minutes waiting for someone who's not going to be there for another five minutes after you've given up and taken the child in...it's always the same ones, too.