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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

mums reading

75 replies

popiuee · 09/11/2010 18:06

i live in the north and wonder if this policy is in place everywhere. Do mums read in ks1 classes and is just anyone allowed to do it? I am shocked that it seems to be a free for all where i am. My concerns are that some mums use to meddle and also these people are not qualified teachers and as such cannot teach the children to read. Also, on the issue of privacy - isn't it reasonable to expect that your child's academic progress should be private - access to information etc. Isn't this an accident waiting to happen? Do other mums think that this is a bit odd or is it just me??

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FreudianSlimmery · 09/11/2010 19:26

I just think if there wasn't such a big deal made of it, and everyone was open about it and not caring who was on what level, then it would no longer be something for parents to gossip about.

JoBettany · 09/11/2010 19:33

Everyone's different though Freudian. If a child is really struggling with reading then I believe a parent has a right to have that matter kept confidential.

I am not saying every parent who comes in to help is going to discuss groupings or ability levels - far from it.

But a school is opening itself up to this possibility when they invite parents in to help.

My son's school do not do this and as far as I know it is not allowed in the local authority his school is in. I am very glad of that.

MrsDinky · 09/11/2010 19:36

I read with both my DCs classes, we also have a code of conduct forbidding us to discuss anything we have seen in school with other parents. I might at the most say to someone that I read with their child that day (they can see my entry in the reading diary anyway) but would not say anything about the reading or about any conversation I had with the child. Or anything else I might have observed in the school. To be honest, you find out very little really, reading book level is such a small part of their overall attainments and this is another reason why parents should not comment, as they do not have all the information to have a proper opinion (even if they happened to be a qualified teacher).

Original poster

popiuee · 09/11/2010 19:37

I agree with Jo. I think all this talk of levels etc is inappropriate for children so young. It's not a question of being secretive, i just prefer to think about if they're having fun, are they happy etc {smile]

OP posts:

MrsDaffodill · 09/11/2010 19:42

As someone who has given hours and hours of voluntary time to our school I find it really sad to think my motives could be judged in this way.

And no, I am not a qualified teacher. But I do have a Linguistics degree and speak three languages so I don't think reading with me for ten minutes fortnightly will exactly harm a child's progress!!!!

In our school, any parents who are judged to be gossipy/there for the wrong reasons, etc, don't last long.

Some of the teachers have their own children in the school. Should that be banned too?

Original poster

popiuee · 09/11/2010 19:50

I think that the majority of mums who volunteer are doing great job and am reassured that the others don't last very long. I don't think it should be banned because hopefully the pro's outweigh the con's. I just wanted to know what the general consensus was. I am interested to know why unsuitable people don't last.

OP posts:

domesticsluttery · 09/11/2010 19:51

I volunteer in my DC's school too, not listening to reading but teaching craft and road safety.

I am really at your attitude OP. If people didn't volunteer at our school then the children wouldn't have their reading listened to as often, they wouldn't be able to take part in as many sporting activities, they wouldn't do as much craft, they wouldn't learn to cross the road safely, they wouldn't have a school garden etc etc.

I sincerely hope that your attitude isn't shared by many parents.

As for gossiping about reading levels, does anyone really care? DS2 is on a very high reading level for his age but can't put his shoes on the right feet. It is an indicator that he is good at reading and not that he is an all round child genius.

domesticsluttery · 09/11/2010 19:52

Cross posted.

I would imagine that unsuitable people don't last long as the teachers aren't all that keen on having gossiping and meddling parents in school either!

MrsDaffodill · 09/11/2010 19:55

What domesticsluttery said - teachers don't want gossiping spies in their classroom.

Such parents soon find their services not required....

abr1de · 09/11/2010 20:01

'As someone who has given hours and hours of voluntary time to our school I find it really sad to think my motives could be judged in this way.'

Me too. I have been helping in a primary for the last six years.

IndigoBell · 09/11/2010 20:01

I am always totally embarassed when parents read with my DD and find out that she can't read at all. All of my friends know that, but I'm not friends with all the Mums....

Nor are the parents able to help her. She's not failing to learn to read because of lack of practice.....

So, while a brilliant idea in theory, in practice there are some kinks to be worked out.....

I've also found the same when I've read with kids. There are kids who are on totally the wrong level (books are too hard and they can't read them) - yet I don't have an opportunity to tell the teacher that, so it's been an awful frustrating exercise for me and the child.

So, yes, done badly it is a bad idea. But I'm sure most schools handle it better :)

Curiousmama · 09/11/2010 20:02

I'm waiting for my crb to come back so that I can help at ds2's school. The teachers are pretty keen for parents to help. I wouldn't dream of discussing any child's progress or lack of and would be disgusted if I heard anyone doing so.

There are some awful teachers though. Ds1 had a couple and ds2 had 1 at his old school. She was so dreadful it's unreal.

Thankfully he's at a small very good school now and has come on leaps and bounds

mrz · 09/11/2010 20:05

IndigoBell I always make sure I am the one working with the children who find reading a bit of a struggle because these children need to be taught not just "heard" I would hope other teachers would do the same.

JoBettany · 09/11/2010 20:08

IndigoBell, that is exactly what my concern is too!

It's not about secrecy - there are just some things about your DC you don't want other parents knowing.

domesticsluttery · 09/11/2010 20:10

What mrz said definitely happens in my DC's school. The more able readers are usually the ones who read with the parent volunteers, the ones who need more help read to the teacher.

Original poster

popiuee · 09/11/2010 20:10

Aaah, so the system is regulated. I am sorry if I have offended any well meaning and valuable volunteers but my op was directed at the few unsuitable ones.

OP posts:

ChineseGinger · 09/11/2010 20:16

Top tip for nosey parents if you want to know which level each child in your dc's class are reading at - just ask your dc, they all know what level their peers are on - that way you can gossip all the like without breeching confidentiality & you can save yourself some time and effort from volunteering. Only the idiots take the time to volunteer to find out reading levels.

I volunteer roughly 10 hours a week. I help out in my dc's classes and I help out in other years too. The teachers plan to do more creative and challenging work when I'm there to support. I spend a lot of time helping kids in class and out - I get a lot from it - I'm not interested in what level children are at, I love to help them understand problems...think things through and get that lightbulbs moment, it's hugely rewarding. I spend over an hour a week with several children throughout the school who are really struggling with reading comprehension or maths, the children really appreciate the one to one time and it really makes a difference - if their parents felt the way the OP did then I'd suggest they let the teacher know so the child can be removed from the list and people like me can spend their valuable time helping the children whose parents are grateful for their help.

spanieleyes · 09/11/2010 20:27

I started as an unpaid volunteer in my son's class some 12 years ago, no, I wasn't a trained teacher, but I am now

MrsDinky · 09/11/2010 20:35

I'm not offended Popiuee - I can sort of see where you are coming from. There was one mum who used to read with my DS's class and I wasn't massively happy with her being privy to his reading level/contents of bookbag for similar reasons (it was before the code of conduct came in), she no longer helps in school at all, as others have said, the schools are pretty wise to people who have the wrong motives. I get a lot of satisfaction out of helping at school, and I am pretty sure the children benefit and enjoy it too. The teachers are extremely grateful too.

THK · 10/11/2010 04:15

Its really common where we are and not odd at all.
There will be the odd parent doing it for the wrong reasons and who will gossip but thats life, people do compare and do talk.
Most Mums dont do it for self serving purposes.
Perhaps you over thinking it because you are a teacher??

FreudianSlimmery · 10/11/2010 07:04

I'm hoping not just to help with reading but also to help with any maths-related things, I'm hoping to be a primary teacher specialising in maths so I figured it would be a good start! The head teacher seemed like they'd be grateful for any help they can get tbh!

Can't deny it'd be good to see inside the school, but only because my kids will be there in the future.

miffyjane · 10/11/2010 07:49

I find it really annoying when people moan about mums giving up their time to help the children out.

The more children read aloud the better their reading will be so having parents helping out is very beneficial. Having helped with reading for several years I know my phonics pretty well now. If the teacher stopped to hear the class of 30 read each day they would not have time to do much teaching.

I like to help out in my children's own classes as I like to get to know the children in the class and want to feel the time I am giving will result in my children being listened to more with reading. At our school parents do not sit in the classroom but a seperate room. However it can be reassuring to have a glimpse of what is going on in the classroom as you pick up the next reader. How many of our children tell us what they have done at school each day?

The idea of helping out in a different class is like asking people to raise money for another school PTA. If people are giving up their time on a voluntary basis they should be free to choose where they spend their time. If a particular parent is indiscreet they should be spoken to by the school. There is no need for all parents to be banned from helping in their child's class because one parent can't keep their mouth shut.

Reading levels are no secret. The children know who is on what level.

gorionine · 10/11/2010 08:00

Sorry, only had time to read OP.

The "mother helpers" are not there to teach your child to read, they are there to listen to him read as it is hard for the teacher to hear every single child on a 1 to 1 basis regularely.

Do you really think that some parents would offer their time just so that they can have "insider knowledge" of other children's reading level?

Sorry but I think it is really silly!

Goblinchild · 10/11/2010 08:10

I love parent helpers in school, they help level the playing field for so many children who don't get enough quality parenting at home, or who need someone to be interested and enthusiastic about being with them. I use parents for all sorts of activities, maths and literacy, science, art and DT, ICT support.
They are not teachers, or TAs but it's wonderful seeing what a bit of adult support can do for any child.
Yes, I am fussy about which parents, and yes, the children who read to parent helpers are selected with thought.
OP, why not say to the teacher that you don't want your child working with a parent helper? She will have more than two dozen other children who could benefit instead.

So thank you to everyone on this thread who helps out in schools, your contribution to the general wellbeing of the children is considerable.

IndigoBell · 10/11/2010 08:20

Slightly off topic here - but goblin child how do you know children aren't getting quality parenting at home. Pretty big claim to make......

If I listened to what my children told me about school I'd believe they did no work :) and if I listened to my daughter read I'd believe no one had tried to teach her to read :)

so how on earth do you know these kids are being neglectd??????

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