birthday parties

[mal1234]

my boys started primary school this year. So far this year he has been to 8 birthday parties and im sure there are more to come.
We end up going to the local toy store every time to get a present to bring to the party. I usually spend in the region of £15 a party, plus a card. I am not bothered about the money it just that I am pretty sure that what we are buying is not what the kids wants.
Just want to know does anyone just give money to kids at birthdays. I was thinking of doing this in future: 1. it means the kid can put all its money together and the parent/s can go shopping and get what the kid really wants. 2. I dont have to go to toy shopping every week.

However I dont know the bad form on may part.

Any advice would be appreciated.

Personally I don't spend anywhere near that much for birthday parties and feel a bit shocked if people did for one of my DC's birthdays.

I wouldn't have a problem with being given money - I think it would be rude to ask for it, but if you are happy giving it, that's fine I think

15 quid sounds very high - round our way the middle class norm is 5 to 10 quid.
DD has recieved Mothercare gift vouchers in the past, but it's not usual.

£5 is the norm here.

Between 5 and 10 £s. My son makes the card. Everyone knows it gets very costly. And I think that kids' imagination etc can grow with stuff they're given but wouldn't automatically choose. If they really hate it/ have two of something, you can give it to someone else! No doubt I've shocked some M/netters with that admission !!

If i can find something worthwhile for £5 then great but usually £8 to £10. We have received book vouchers which my DD loved, and money in the card too which she also thought was quite grownup as she got to choose what she wanted.

Maybe just mention around the next party time that you haven't got a clue what to buy X and mention you may put money in and see what the general consenseus is - you may be surprised!

We often go and buy a load of books in one go as they are always useful and around the £5 mark.

Is it worth doing what my mum used to do and buy a few bits and bobs in the Jan sales of the relevant age range and then get your child to pick what they want to give each child as party time comes round? £15 a pop seems expensive as heck!

I wouldn't give money that young to be honest - it's the whole having lots of things to unwrap they're into, they become hard nosed financeers in a few years!

thanks for all your advice. The general consensus seems to be that I am paying too much. This discussion has sparked a thought with me: would any of you use a service whereby you can login to a child birthday site and give money (£5 or £10 or what ever it would be). A link to the website could be printed on there invitations. The child would then have a combined sum of money which they or the parents could then spend on something the child wants. This may be for a slightly older child, 8yrs +.
Less hassle for the parent and the kids get what they want.

What are your views - good idea or not. Useful or not.

I think children love the pile of wrapped presents, even if they are not expensive, so money wouldn't cut it for me.

I wish some of the toy shops would start a gift list service though - you know, you go in and get 'Freddies Smiths' list and choose and buy something you know he actually wants. If I know the parents quite well I usually ask them, otherwise I get an art/craft kit, a book, or small lego set.

I spend £7-9 - the main thing is that it looks like a nice gift - usually craft-related things that I go for (mainly girls parties we go to). If they are kids of longstanding friends of ours or particular friends I would spend a little more if I saw something they would really like.
I would not be amused to be told to give cash or donate. Sorry. I can see the rationale but to me it sort of says "we don't want your tat"...

At a push, I'd give an Amazon voucher, but probably for a 7 plus year old child.

Certainly not £15 - always under £10. I buy generic age 7/ age 4 or thereabouts presents in the sales or when I see a good deal.( my DC's ages )Also buy in bulk if you see something with mass appeal. eg I bought 6 of these. They have been very popular with DS's friends.

I always buy vouchers.

One of the fantastic things about having a party as a child is the pile of pressies to open afterwards. I remember this as a child myself; my dad peeling the cellotape off really carefully so we could reuse the paper! What the present is doesn't actually matter all that much to a young child.

I try to spend less than £10 on presents, more for best friends. I get my children to decorate large sticky labels to put on the presents rather than buying cards too.

No wouldn't use such a website. I usually buy some craft stuff for girls and lego for boys. Not a big thing, costs me about £8 and we make cards ourselves.

I would not like a site like that either...kids like presents...wrapped up with a bow on.

Argos 2 for £15 toys - jobs a good 'un

Or Boots / M&S 3 for 2s

[cheapskate where other peoples kids are concerned]

Thanks Taffetacat for your link - they look terrific and will def try some.

Beginning of term I went to Toys-R-Us and bought £100 of lego and Ben 10 gear . This should last most of the year for birthday prezzies. I have shopped on Amazon too when i know if one of the children is really keen on trains/cars/books - amazing what you can find for very little and the effort to find something special is REALLY appreciated.

have to sya I think particularly when small there is nothing like a present to unwrap so never give money or vouchers till 10 or older!

I stock up on books from thebookpeople.com They have great deals and you can get lovely books worth £15 for only £5. I figure you can't go wrong with books!

Definitely would not use a website like that. And would think it very , and a bit rude, to be asked to give a present/money in this way.

i put £5 in kids bday cards

In London it was £8-£10. Round here it is more like £10-£15. Depends really on your area.

But yes, stock up and bulk buy and put them in the cupboard. The same with cards, buy a pack of 10 for greatly reduced price. Then you just pop into the cupboard when a party comes along.

Also, I use Amazon a lot when I know what I want to buy. I have just bought 5 books which I will pop in with other presents. They were 50% off marked price - £2.30 each.

Vouchers - my stepson used to get a few when he was about 8-10years and he liked it.

A little planning saves you a lot of time.

£5.00-£10.00 plus a card made by your kids.
Buy something useful.
I like the idea of vouchers. I wonder whether parents use them for their shopping needs instead of their kid (s).

I spend up to about £5 but have a present box that gets stocked up in the sales. Monsoon/Accessorize do brilliant reductions on bags, funky gloves, hair clips, necklace sets etc., Red House and the Book People are brilliant for books and Amazon often have very good prices on things such as doodle books. This way the gift my DD gives may have an original cost of more than £5 but I won't have spent that.

DD makes a card or else I buy them from Phoenix Trading (90p each if you buy 10+).

I'm not keen on the idea of a money-based gift list website but do use this site for family (both sides are list fans, this saves having to co-ordinate/remember). It's not happened yet but I suppose if someone asks me what DD1 would like for her birthday I might tell them about that but I'm more likely to say, "pritt stick, sellotape, blutak and Sylvanian Families".