Did you take DS/DD out of state education into Private education? If so what reasons?

[minipops1974]

Im sure this line of thread has been done lots of times - Its something at the back of our minds and just wondered if anyone has done it - and if it paid off..
Hope you dont mind me asking...

My DS(8) is at an outstanding state primary. It has a very laid back atmosphere and follows a "creative" curriculum. At DS's parent evening, his teacher told me he was very bright but often not engaged. Her opinion is that he is bored and "needs a school which moves at a faster pace and is more competitive". Realistically, that means private in this area. Unfortunately, we don't have £15k per year to spare so I will have to do what I can at home.

Yes. One was bored (similar to WoodRose), the other was unhappy.

I'm not sure why a teacher who recognises a child needs to move at a faster pace isn't able to provide for his needs

I did the reverse, moved them from a small independent school to an outstanding comprehensive.

Not all independents are good neither are all state schools.

Woodrose I would have asked the teacher what she was going to do to meat your dd needs.

A creative curriculum should give your bored ds lots of opportunities to extend himself, otherwise it is not doing its job.

I cannot believe that a teacher would advise someone to take their child out of a school to go a private setting. Apart from it being an admission of bad planning and management on the teacher's part, it would also take several thousand pounds from the school's budget.

I have done this with my 3 youngest DCs. Their primary school only focussed on core subjects and the curriculum was narrow and boring. They catered to the lowest common denominator.

When they moved into the independent sector, it was quite disturbing how much they had missed out on.

Woodrose prep is far cheaper than secondary, usually about half the cost. Ds is in yr 2 and I pay £7,200 pa. Some preps give scholarships/bursaries too.

Ds is at private school because he is the sort of child that would get lost in a class of 30. Does the bear minimum and doesn't make a fuss. Can't get away with it in a class of 15.

Why are you thinking of it?

Yes - but am deciding on giving it another term - from private nursery (very expensive hard to get into) Oh god I sound pompous.. Where DD came out at a very high standard - local school really isnt great (so far) Classroom busy - very dull - Parents are scary!!! Oh please dont hate me for that comment.. We live in a very poor area..

You find scary parents at private schools too - just a different type of scary!!!

Over the years lots of state schooled hcildren have joined DCs independent school.

Some parents always had it in mind to go private a bit later and took advantage of saving some cash during the early years.

Others moved because they became disenchanted with the school allocated to them. Class sizes,unsupported SEN,unsupportive parents etc are all regularly cited as the reasons.

Our dss' lovely local state primary also follows a creative curriculum. Both dss have been identified as exceptionally bright, and with respect to ds1, who is not remotely the self-motivated sort, this does currently result in a reasonable amount of 1-1 time being spent with him to cater for him (which I am aware not all state schools would be willing or able to provide). Ds2 is easier to keep motivated and interested, because with very little extra guidance, he's off and away, getting on with his own projects. A creative curriculum should be an advantage - a more interesting layer of learning above and beyond the core skills which are so easily acquired by the cognitively more able children. Also, the school has a lovely atmosphere - the children are friendly and confident, and albeit the level of achievement at the start of the school is apparently generally below the national average, achievement by the end of school is above the national average, so it would be difficult to be critical of the general quality of the teaching.

If I were unhappy with my children's school, I would consider private education, but I wouldn't on the sole basis that a private school might be more academic. There is so much more to primary school than ensuring your child is academically stretched. And fwiw, I was solely state educated, whereas my siblings were partly privately educated (to between the ages of 11 and 14). I was by far and away the most academically successful and also had the happiest school experience overall. So the choice between state and private is never going to be a simple one in my opinion.

I moved my DD earlier this year at the half way point in year three.

DD was in a very good infant school but the junior school was useless. She was transferred as a "cause for concern" child as whilst she easily got level 3 SATS in maths and reading she only just got level 1 in writing, had chaotic spelling and frequently reversed numbers.

On the fifth time of asking what the school's plan was for addressing her problems I was told that I needed to get my head around the fact that DD wasn't very bright. When I disputed this the teacher and the head said that middle class parents always found it harder to take having an unintelligent child. She was out of the school within two weeks. We found an independent selective girl's school which had a place and they noted on her entrance assessment that she was highly likely to be dyslexic. She was subsequently found to be intelligent but dyslexic, dyspraxic and dysgraphic by her Ed. Psych.

I shudder to think what might have happened if we'd left her in the other school. She's now in a class of 16 girls whereas before she was in a class of 36. She gets a bit of extra dyslexia help but the smaller quieter atmosphere of the school seems to be helping a lot.

There's also a much wider range of extra-curricular activities available at her school than at any of the local state schools - although I accept that may be different in other areas.

Another big advantage for us is that, although DD will have to pass the upper school exam, she will have a guaranteed place whatever her pass mark.

I also get far more frequent updates from her private school and better access to her teacher including feedback on strategies that are helping or not helping to deal with DD's problems.

DS is in an oustanding infant school but he'll be transferring to the private sector in year three also.

I'm vice-chair of governors at his infant school and can only see a downward spiral ahead for state education. Our school has just lost a lot of SEN funding because it is now being allocated on a per child basis rather than following needs. The result is that our school loses out (despite having a high benchmarked SEN level) and schools in nice areas get more money. We've just lost two teaching assistant posts.

stands back and awaits accusations of being two faced, hypocritical and generally the spawn of satan...

We moved the DSs from an 'Outstanding' primary at Yrs 3 and 1 respectively.

DS1 is uber academic and learnt nothing in Year 2, and was bullied my the football crowd for being 'geeky'. He used to get frustrated that 'the only awards are for football, 'trying hard' and good behaviour - why?'
He has flourished at his prep school - at music, drama, science, maths - and loves the fact that every child is valued for their skills, whatever they are.

DS2 was young in year and was completely 'lost' in a class of 30. Went through Reception without learning much. I used to help in the classroom and witnessed how it was more about 'crowd control' and behaviour management rather than education.
He is now in Year 4 and doing well. Most importantly, his confidence and self-esteem has grown.

So, different kids, different reasons, but definitely the right decision IMHO.

Also worth asking yourself, minipops1974, whether you are considering opting into the private sector for the rest of your child's education (and whether you can afford that), or whether you hope to opt back into the state sector again later on, as there are also potential issues involved with the switch back.

The choice you eventually make is not one of state versus private, it will depend on the schools in question, the personality of your child, how much money you actually have to spare and how you wish to spend what you have if private education is not something easily afforded, and what you want your child to get out of primary level education. It is not an objective decision - you have to accept that your choice is going to be very subjective and that you will therefore have as many critics of the choice you make as supporters.

We have been visiting all the local prep schools with a view to moving DS from state to private in the next few years. He is fairly bright and very happy at our very good (but vast) primary school in Year 3, but is not coping especially well with a class size of 31. State school was always a bit of an unknown for me (privately educated throughout, although DH went to his local comp) so I became as involved as possible and am a governor at his school. KS2 seems to be lacking, and children do not do as well as their KS1 SATS suggest they should.

So we are looking at a move for year 5, possibly, assuming we can save enough to make that possible. We already know we would ideally like him to move to independent school at 11 as our state secondaries are NOT good.

Yes. He was bored, miserable because being bullied (by one small psychopath and his class teacher) and got no support with writing or spelling (mild dyspraxia). It has made a huge difference to his happiness and his achievement levels and is worth every penny.

BUT you do need to be very clear why you are moving the child, and really grill the new head as to whether they can/will cope if needs be.

I was moved 28 years ago from state to private. My state school could no longer cope with me. I'd been moved up an academic year at age 5 or 6, and at 7 or 8 they wanted to move me up ANOTHER year. My parents weren't happy with that and moved me to a private prep school, where they put me back into my own age group. Within a term I had been moved back up a year, but no further. I went up with that cohort throughout the rest of my schooling.

My mum still says that she knew they'd made the right decision when I came home from school after a week at the prep school and said 'It's great, mum, I don't have to go round and teach the other children any more!'

Wow - thank you all so much for your thoughts and experiences.. Its good to hear the good the bad and the indifferent .. Galena - that really made me laugh.. Its a tough call - and yes you are right you have to make the decision and stick with it - you could have all sorts of complications ahead. Thanks so much

My three DCs have all gone to the same independent school that Halloweeseg moved hers from, and I would agree with her. It has suited two of minbe beautifully, but not the other one, and I have wrangled on and off for years about whether to take him out. If I was in catchment for decent state school place (like she is) then I would, but it is the least worst option for me!

I am not especially convinced by or committed to private education, only for doing the best with the options I have a available to me.

I guess I must be very lucky - my DDs are both in the state sector and we are completely happy. They are both very bright and are being catered for superbly - DD1 is in Yr 5 - middle school where we are - the school streams by academic ability and she has blossomed in confidence through being taught in a small group of 15 or 16 in her subject groups because she is no longer odd one out for doing well. DD2 is in Yr 3 - is doing maths in the 2nd set in Yr 4 and loving it, has been identified as highly able in writing and is being offered frequent 1:1 and excursions for specialist masterclasses at no cost to us. I think it might be because we are in a small town, not a large urban conglomeration???
Even if I won the lottery I'd never go private, but that's because I come from a country (Holland) where private education hardly exists - there are good schools and bad schools just like everywhere else but there isn't the big class/financial divide. I guess I'm just an old leftie at heart and I also feel confident that I'd be able to support my child academically, irrespective of what the school was doing (obviously if the school was rife with crime and drugs taht would be a reason for taking them out). Ihave a few concerns about our local secondary school, but they do seem to be making good progress, and there's a lot of choice in sixth form colleges around too.

MRZ - I must admit I was taken aback by the teacher's comments. IMHO, it was an admission of failure on their part. Unfortunately, it is not a school which extends their more able pupils. The HT's view is that "the bright ones can look after themselves".

I don't think the creative curriculum in itself is a problem. I think the problem for my son is the way it has been implemented in his school. There is a huge emphasis on art and creative writing, neither of which he enjoys particularly. Science seems to be little more than an add on and the maths teaching so far has been very poor. These are the subjects which engage DS, so he is finding school a bit dull.

By the way, this is not a state vs private thing. There are state schools in this area which are more academic and provide enriched learning for their more able pupils. However, these schools are so over-subscribed that DS doesn't have any realistic chance of getting in. Alas, we live in London so prep fees here are STILL around £15k.

Oh, forgot to mention - because my DS is on the top table for literacy, he gets no extra or 1 on 1 help. Teacher explains lesson to class and distributes works sheet/ assignment. Those who are struggling are taken out for extra help. Teacher spends time with middle tables. Top tables can ask for help if needed. Teacher collects their assignment/ worksheet at the end of lesson. DS isn't very self-motivated and I think he switches off with the lack of attention or feedback.

Doing the bare minimum to stay in the top sets is, unfortunately, a method of staying under the radar and avoiding attention. In a state school with large class sizes, it is better either to be well self-motivated, or to be noticeable - eg by failing to do anything whatsoever until the teacher comes over to prompt you, so that she is obliged to do something extra for you to inspire your effort and attention...