I've posted this in SN as well but thought someone here might know.
Where do I stand legally on this?
Background: My ds's needs are not being met at his ms school although the school think that they are meeting his needs. Things have been bad since he started (5 weeks ago), they refuse to communicate with us and just poo poo our concerns. He has got out of school once although this has been dealt with in a satisfactory manner so I don't think it would happen again. He has been hitting other children and I have only found out about it from my dd or other children. I have been in and spoken to the teacher on a number of occassions, the last one just over a week ago, saying that I knew he was hitting in school I was concerned by the reports I was hearing. The teacher categorically told me even then that there were no concerns even though she admitted that he hits on a regular basis but not everyday. I told her that I wanted to be informed of any hitting.
Fast forward to Thursday morning this week. I notice ds is only sitting next to someone on his left side. The girl next to him had been moved. I knew he'd been hitting her from my dd but thats it. Thursday 9:05 ds hit the girl on his left with a book. This was witnessed by the girls mother. She went in an complained after school.
Friday morning I have to leave my son sitting by himself with a table between himself and the rest of the group. The teacher did not make any attempt to talk to me. He was picked up by the after school club and he spent 3hrs telling the staff there how much he hated school and he's not allowed to sit next to anyone. I pick him up from there and he spent until he went to bed telling me and dh repeatedly how he hates school. Again this morning he's said he hates school, that he's the only one who isn't allowed to sit next to his friends, he can't hear his friends, he wants to sit next to dd so she can tell him what his friends are saying.
I don't want to have it out with the teacher in the classroom 1st thing monday morning, I don't trust her, I need witnesses to her conversation that aren't parents. We have a meeting set up for after half-term. We clearly can't wait that long.
I'm not prepared to take him back to an environment where he's excluded not included and where his needs are ignored and not met. I have promised ds that I won't let him be so unhappy and lonely at school as he was on Friday.
So I currently see that my only option in the immediate time is to remove him from school. Where do I stand legally on this? He's not 5 yet (5 at end of April). Can they have me hung drawn and quartered for refusing him an education? I am prepared to go and view other schools with a view to starting him after half term? I am also prepared to look seriously at HE for the next half term at least. I just don't know where I stand legally with it all. The last thing I need is a social worker on my doorstep over this.