Talk to me about girls friendships in Year 3 please.

[Pernickety]

Or in the Juniors as a whole.

DD1 changed schools in the middle of Year 2. At her previous school she had one best friend. At the time I'd have preferred her to play with more people, but her best friend was a lovely little girl.

When DD1 moved to her new school, she made new friends. She seemed to play with lots of people but again developed one closer friend. As bad luck would have it, this girl moved during the summer and so left the school.

Now, in Year 3, she seems a bit lost and reports playing with some of the boys who are her friends, but not so often any of the girls. She doesn't play with anyone consistently. There are only 8 girls in her class (2 of which aren't very nice).

I'm sure I am being an over sensitive mother. I don't remember having a specific friend at that age, but 3 or 4 friends I played with consistently.

Is she still just too new? The other girls will have had 2.5 years of history before DD turned up. Do friendships start to develop better the further up the school they go?

I've always found that Y2/3 girls can drive me crackers falling in and out with each other. By Y4 it's the boys turn to drive me crackers and by Y5/6 the girls and the boys are falling in and out of lurrrve with each other and there's so much drama it's like an episode of Hollyoaks/Corrie/Eastenders/24 all rolled into one!

Maybe she's like me and my mum both are - we've both got naff all time for girlie drippy politics and have very very dear close male friends, but not many female friends.

Yes, maybe. The boys she is friends with are lovely sweet boys. And DD is super sweet also. She has always played well with boys as all our antenatal class had boys and she is close to her male cousin.

Following my dd having one special friend and feeling she couldn't play with anybody else, we encouraged play with others boys and girls. She is now year 4 and very settled in her self, will play with anybody and will not exclude others. The original special friend has moved on to another and they appear to be one of the few couples in the play ground.
Your daughter will be fine and find her own way, encourage others to come a play for short while after school.....always interesting.

My niece had a phase of this lostness and she had not even moved schools...she got over it though and mde a new close friend. It's normal as they develop their personalities more...in myown DD's school there are only 5 girls and they tend to play all together or in 2 groups..but they are only in year 2.

I suggestyou tell DD she can have a girl to play if she likes....the shared bond of out of school play helps to forge friendships.

If she's happy playing with just boys I'd leave it at that and not make a big deal about who her friends are. In Year 3 my dd had a steady group of 3-4 girls who she played with and sometimes two boys used to join them, but even then there were phases where they seemed to go off each other and played with other people occasionally.

Thank you, your responses are reassuring.

We've moved house a few times (we're settled now and she won't be changing schools again)and cannot shake the feeling that I have messed things up for DD1 with regards to her being able to form solid friendships.

However, she is happy at school and maybe, having had to cope with change so many times has served her well. I think she sometimes prefers the company of older (kind) girls or younger children, and naturally takes herself away from children not playing fairly. DD1 doesn't have a mean streak in her body (not even towards her more hectic younger sister, who manages to annoy me and DH quite frequently!)