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Primary education

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my 4 year old ds is so talkative in school and sometimes doesn't listen...

9 replies

pinayangel0912 · 28/09/2010 16:39

Ace has been doing quite well despite being the youngest (aug 20) but sometimes always isn't listening to his teacher and being disruptive at times... its like he is the class clown!!
but at least he is not fighting/agressive etc, teacher said he is hyperactive, my mum said to me to note down all things and there might be something wrong and take him doctor????????

i wasn't called in or anything, since last week, just been having a few words after i pick him up after school.... he is still finding it hard...

He is very talkative and doesn't know when to stop.... as his teacher said he is non -stop!

help please.....

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woahwoah · 28/09/2010 17:03

Well, first of all remember he is very young and things will probably improve any way as he matures.

But there are a few things you could do to help, and make his life at school happier in the long run. There is a big contrast between life at home, where he is given lots of attention, and probably choice, to life at school, which is necessarily constrained by routine, and where he has to share adult attention.

So, at school he has to sit and listen for a few minutes, even if he would rather be doing something else. At home, you could try calling him over to share a story or do a jigsaw, and gently insist if he does not want to just then. The idea is to get him used to doing something perfectly pleasant, that he would rather not do at that exact moment! just reducing his choice a tiny bit.

You could also talk to him about listening to the teacher - explain why he should very simply. Be firm that this is non-negotiable. Maybe offer a small treat if the teacher reports an improvement! Wink

Lots of children find it hard to accept that at school they cannot speak exactly when they want, but may have to wait for other children or adults to finish. So at home, don't let him interrupt your conversations; just say to wait a moment while you finish talking to granny or whoever (and then make sure you talk to her for a minute or so more!)Grin.

Hope you don't mind me making these suggestions. These are ideas lots of parents have tried with children who find paying attention hard - they are not being hard or uncaring; quite the opposite, they are trying to make sure their children have a happier time at school and get told off less! (I teach reception btw, and have 2 DCs of my own, one of whom was v young and lively in his first year at school!)

HTH

pinayangel0912 · 28/09/2010 17:10

wow! Thanks very much for the advice! I have been talking to him in the monring to listen to the teacher etc... and i will buy some nice stickers for him tommorow...

Do you think this is a case of adhd or add... or just ignore my sillyness!! I mean if its an activity like drawing/colouring/painting or something he enjoys looking at books/lego/building he will always enjoy and is normally playing nicely... im just quite confused.

Thanks once again.

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woahwoah · 28/09/2010 17:25

I wouldn't even start thinking about adhd or add just yet. He's only just 4, and as you say, he CAN concentrate if he wants to, so I think he probably just needs time / encouragement to settle down and listen etc.

Get the teacher on-side too - suggest that you check with her regularly on how he has been (just a thumbs up or a quick word) so you can reward and praise accordingly. If he hasn't had a good day, just explain again briefly why he should listen.

He sounds a lovely lively little chap, a child with spirit! I wouldn't worry unless things get much worse, or unless he hasn't improved at all by Y1. (You may gather I'm not fond of labelling children. They are individuals!)

pinayangel0912 · 28/09/2010 17:57

Thank you so much hun! You are a gem! Thanks for reassuring me... well if you did see him... you would actaully think so too that he is a lively lil lad and has too much spirit... lol. thanks once again... she did say to me, he might take a lil longer to settle down.
Have a good evening. x

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sarahfreck · 28/09/2010 18:13

If he is able to concentrate on a range of activities (eg books, lego, colouring) then I wouldn't worry about ADHD! Just help him to learn that he can't always say what he is thinking exactly at that moment. Suggestions by previous posters on how to do this sound good.

pinayangel0912 · 28/09/2010 18:19

Thanks sarahfreck! x

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pinayangel0912 · 28/09/2010 18:19

at the moment he is drawing/stamping so he is quite happy... thanks all

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woahwoah · 28/09/2010 18:19

You too, angel!

pinayangel0912 · 04/10/2010 17:01

hi all,

I asked his teacher how he has been today, its same as usual.. talking too much... she said he may not be ready for school just yet. im starting to worry, I know he is defo the youngest, but when he wants to he will concentrate. :(

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