My DS hates Year 1

[CharlieBoo]

Hi, I know its only week 2 f the term but my ds is really struggling in year 1! Every morning he moans he hates it, he says its boring, it's too hard, there's no playing! This morning he cried going in, so it is obvious he's not enjoying it. He LOVED reception, and seemed to really enjoy himself, his confidence grew so much, was really popular, but now has reverted back to the DS of old, clingy and quiet. It makes me sad, I know he'll get used to it again in time. Is this common for year 1, he is my first through school so all is still new.

What makes it harder is all the other children seem to be really enjoying it!

My DS certainly found the start of year 1 a shock. He loved reception and was very enthusiastic about school. This disapeared at the start of year 1 in part because he hated writing which he was required to do in year 1. After a couple of months he got used to what was required and now he's started year 2 with the same levels of enthusiasm he had in reception. I don't think its uncommon for children to find the start of year 1 rather different to reception. I hope your DS gets used to it soon.

I came on here to post with EXACTLY the same issue.

My DS loved Reception too and was so excited about being in year 1 but he says he hates school now.

He says he has to do writing all day (not quite true but they do do a lot and it's his least favourite thing) and that there is nothing to play with at playtime; Reception has fantastic outdoor area with lots of activities and he is a real outdoors adventure loving boy.

There are other children complaining too but he is in a class of 20 girls and 10 boys and the girls are generally better at sitting and writing and more ready for it.
I am emphasising the positive and hoping that he will get used to it without it denting his self-esteem too much - most of the parents seem pleased that things are getting more formal but I'd be happy for a more foundation stage type curriculum for a while - a progression rather than this big shock (they do call it a 'transition' to Key stage 1 but it doesn't feel like it).

I can't help you but your son is not the only one feeling this way. I hope things improve for him once he gets used to it. I find the whole thing painful for my DS.

Mine was the same too. He is now in Year 3 and only ever complained about going to school in the first month of year 1. He used to say "it takes to long to learn and we dont play anymore" but he soon settled.

He is born in July so was one of the younger ones but not really sure if this had an impact on him wanting to play more!

Yes this is very common - I notice more children crying/making a fuss at the start of year 1 than in Reception.

The curriculum has changed recently afaik to make the transition easier - there should be more toys & opportunities for play in Y1 than in the past. If that doesn't seem to be the case, I would ask the teacher about it - if the school is short of toys perhaps you could get involved in getting parents to donate good quality second-hand ones?

And schools so often give NQTs year 1 as the 'easy option' It is a really hard year to teach. The first half term is a nightmare when the children keep asking 'when can we play?'

The best schools try and incorporate elements of play based learning into y1, role play area etc but this is becoming increasingly rare.

Year 1 children generally cheer when it's wet play because they get to 'play with stuff'

So, sorry no real advice but perfectly normal

Ds2 going through exactly the same..moaning about working all the time and it is "boring". He was happy today though as he got a sticker for being quiet during reading time! Bless him! Tomorrow we go to a meeting about homework and what is expected of them...expect he will moan about that as well!

Hello, I hope that your DCs settle really soon I know they will and it is not at all uncommon.

Im a mummy that worries so much about my child and also have been teaching year 1 for many years now and boys do find it so much harder than girls when 'transition' seems only to happen in year 1. That is a wee gripe on my part as I would love to offer my pupils the same facilities to aid in the cross over but they are exclusive to year r. It is my hope that those in reception whose foundation stage scores are developing well would receive some whole class teaching prior to the change over in combination with the excellent level of independent learning the foundation stage offers.

Anyhoo, speak to the year 1 teacher about how your DS is feeling. Sometimes it is obvious to the teacher... sometimes it is not. Simple things can really help. I allow activity time everyday, and initial short literacy and maths session allow for activities to follow too - I find sharing a visual timetable with boys to let them know just how much activity time they will get, the fun equipment they will now be able to use in PE, the plans for construction in D&T, the ICT tasks, the sculptures we will create in art, the trips they will go on etc.usually gets them really fired up, positive and excited about what is to come in year 1.

Just to add that my DS also seems to be finding yr 1 a bit of a shock. He hasn't really complained about going, but doesn't seem to be bounding into the room like he did before. He seems very tired and just a little glum

I've also found the transition difficult, as his reception teachers were lovely - really enthusiastic and caring, and very gentle with the parents! His year 1 teacher is not nearly as friendly with the parents, although I think she is quite good with the kids.

Reception just seemed so fun, and I can't help feeling that it's all downhill from here

"I find sharing a visual timetable with boys to let them know just how much activity time they will get, the fun equipment they will now be able to use in PE, the plans for construction in D&T, the ICT tasks, the sculptures we will create in art, the trips they will go on etc.usually gets them really fired up, positive and excited about what is to come in year 1."

Sorry to sound picky but as the mother of a ds I would not actually be that happy about how much you are stereotyping boys! I think what you're saying is a great idea for those struggling with transition but not all boys do/ all girls don't.

Of course it might well be that in your experience more boys are like that but I'm sure plenty aren't.

mychatnickname I was responding primarily to the concerns of the mummies whose DSs were finding the changes difficult. In my experience, yes, it is boys that find it the trickiest and while my post may have been stereotypical in your opinion, rest assured my teaching is not. I take the hours needed to create personalised visual timetables for those boys who do show difficulties with the transition either at home or in school and do not assume that is it the same for every boy. If I was to be told of a little girl in the same situation, I would of course do the same for her. At present there are some girls who find the change in seating arrangements a little difficult as they are not with their peers of choice. Again, systems are in place to support and comfort them. I would have no objection to reversing or completely re-thinking the whole system daily to adapt to any the need of any child! Very Picky!

I think it must be quite common to find Y1 less fun than Reception. Whether a particular child will come to enjoy it is hard to predict.

Quite a lot of the children who arrive into our home education group enjoyed Reception and then never liked school after that. Some parents take them out after a few months, some after a year or two or longer when it becomes obvious that the environment just doesn't suit their children.

If your son doesn't perk up soon, would it be an option to take him out of school for a year or two and then try school again when he is a bit older? Five is very young for him to be spending most of his day doing things other than playing.

This time last year I could have written this post myself about my dd!

She also loved reception and found it a big jump going into year 1. Reception is quite informal and play-based so there's little wonder it's such a shock for some children when they are suddenly expected to sit at a desk and work. It took my dd a good half a term to settle in and even now we have to use reinforcement systems sometimes if she won't apply herself in class.

I'm sure he'll settle in time.

Mammak - you sound like a fantastic teacher. I know I seemed picky and it is a minor point in some ways but this stereotyping of ALL boys as being boisterous and unable to concentrate for a nano-second is something which can be harmful.
It is a minor point as I say and I do understand that you were responding to the OP and very helpfully with ideas. I just get fed up of the stereotyping on here and in RL.

Thank you for all your replies. Mammak, can you come to my ds' school pleeeeaase?? lol. More tears this morning, had a chat with teacher, who agrees its not uncommon and its also a shock after such a long holiday. She is going to keep an eye on him. He is a bright boy, and seems to pick things up easily but he just wants to play. Oh if only he applied himself......he has spellings today for first time and has mastered the ones he has, so said he can have some football stickers after school if he had tried hard. It took him till half term to settle in reception, so we will see, thanks agian....

DS hated Y1 for all the reasons mentioned above (and not helped by him having a very strict teacher). The school even said that they had made Y1 MORE play based because so many children had struggled with the the transition. It took him until summer term (sorry) to be reconciled to going to school - we had daily moans and complaints till then. However (touch wood) he is loving Year 2 so far!!

Ok, I have relaxed a little now and thank you mychatnickname and CharlieBoo for being so sweet after my rant!
I hope CharlieBoo that your DS's teacher takes on board your concerns. I understand the worry that you must feel when you put your child in the care of someone else and they seem so unhappy. I think of my child every minute and feel the most incredible guilt if I find out she has been unhappy and I haven't been with her (working mummy of a toddler guilt). I hope I was empathic before but now it is being a mummy that drives nearly all my decisions at school. Hence the tenderness mychatnickname . I really hope that your DS is allowed to flourish in an environment that best suits him. xxx

I think I'll add you to my list of 'teachers I'd like to clone' along with mrz . You sounds wonderful.

My DD is hating it too.I would happily HE until she is seven,or feels ready for school,but we have a problem in that our school is Welsh speaking but we are not a Welsh-speaking family.I speak a bit,but not enough,and DH none as his family don't speak any Welsh.If I take DD out of school now she will find it much harder to integrate later,when the others are all fluent.The decent secondary here is a Welsh language school and so she would really need good welsh to go there.I am agonising over it,I can see the pros and cons of HE,and the pros and cons of school.It is very hard seeing her so unhappy.I really don't know what to do.

sound not sounds -

charlieboo, my ds1 is exactly the same!

it doesn't help that the yr1 teacher isn't that nice either. i think it's a real jump from reception where they basically played all day to yr 1 where it's so much more structured

am now going to read all the other responses to see if there are any good tips!

I came on here to post exactly this problem and I'm really relieved to see that we're not the only ones.

We've got a couple of added problems in that there are tensions between the boys because one little lad is quite dominating and ostracizes all boys who do not want to play 'his' game. We've also got a new discipline system where the children start on green every morning and if they mis-behave go down to yellow, orange and then red which involves a trip to the head. The boys are all complaining that it's too easy to be really naughty when, in reality, it's only 3 small steps from green to red.

I've spoken to the teacher 7 times in the last 2 weeks and we think that he's beginning to cope with the change to Year 1 but the other problems are still causing tears most evenings :-(

I would say, above all, stay calm and communicate with the teacher. When my PFB DS had these difficulties at the start of Year 1 I whipped him out within a couple of weeks and sent him to an 'alternative' school, which solved the immediate problem because there was no academic work at all but left us with lots of other problems in the long run. Moving into Year 1 is a difficult transition, particularly for boys - I have a DD now in Year 1 and she loves it.